Chapter 6 In Person

It had been several days since that weird dream that had made her like him more. The fact that he was still full of respect even in her dream was something that she had not anticipated. She had thought of him to be a little bit on the extra side of the line. She was surprised when he had treated her with kindness and had continued to play her songs for her over and over again. She knew somehow by the time she met this man she would find herself throwing herself onto him wanting to jump his bones. She felt as though she already knew him even though she had barely spent a second with him.

The little fantasies she had of him made school pass easier and easier each time. She found herself looking forward to being in school even though she had not known it would happen at some point. It was not different that Thursday morning as she cheerily prepared for school. She had noticed he was never there in the mornings but afternoons were something to look forward to. She made her way through her classes and whenever she got bored she'd think of how good his voice felt whenever he spoke hence she was brought back to class.

She had been keen with anticipation waiting for the three hour lecture to end. She knew that it had to end soon since she wanted to go hear the beautiful sound of his voice and his piano, two things that were now keeping her sane. Her plan was cut short when the lecturer called for groups to be formed. She for one had other ideas in mind like sitting alone up until the end of the class on the specific corner that had been designated for her. She had wanted nothing more than for the ground to swallow her when she heard the lecturer being keen on forming groups and even paired her with a group of seemingly rich kids. She hated rich kids, she detested them with every inch of her body that had flesh and nerves on it because of how they had treated her before. It still traumatized her till that day of the things they had done. She had promised herself to never associate with the rich kids that were in that town since there was only one thing to it, hurt. She smiled sarcastically as she made her way to where the group had been situated.

She sat through the assignment distribution wanting nothing more than a small break from it. She was already feeling suffocated from the feeling of sitting sandwiched between people and she wished she had just waited a little longer before making her way there since she would have had maybe a more comfortable place to sit. The group then started introducing themselves and she kept silent her eyes avoiding everyone else with the hope that if she did not look at them then they would not notice who she really was. Maybe if she pretended just long enough she would fit in and not even a soul would know her for who she really was. When it was her turn, she smiled before she responded, wanting to seem as hospitable as the next person would. Her smile was one thing she was proud of. The small lifting of the corner of her lips had a way of winning people over. She looked a t the rest of the troupe, two boys and three girls who she was meant to work hand in hand with. Deciding they were not all bad, she decided to give it a go.

"Hey I'm Peris." She spoke rather timidly for her liking but when one of the boys smiled she knew that it was alright. She had always wanted approval, as a matter of fact. craved for it so when the young man smiled she knew she had won. She smiled back at him and fell quite as she usually did whenever the situation warranted it, for her ever situation did give that warrant. She listened as everyone introduced up before she waited to hear from their group leader what her assignment was. She wanted to handle it alone and just submit it to the group and she was lucky that she was given her own topic to handle. Nothing could have made her happier than she was at that moment, finding out that she had that opportunity. She kept glancing at the clock and the leader waiting for them to just end the discussion already but it didn't seem to happen. Her breath was slowly starting to get caught in her throat and she was finding it hard to breath yet she made the effort to appear as normal as possible to everyone around her. Finally she couldn't take it any more and she decided to just walk out. She was a good girl but it was campus after all. She could do as she pleased.

She took huge gulps of air almost gluttonously as she was hit by the cold from outside of the room that they had been coped up in. That felt like relief even to her and she could only imagine what others were feeling in there. She glanced up at the building behind her before sighing and walking away towards the other end of campus where the smoking zone was. She needed to calm her breathing as well as her soul and nothing helped her to that regard more than her cigarette and its sweet scent. She found an empty bench under a huge tree and sat down sighing while she did. She took out a cigarette and her lighter, popping it into her mouth and lighting it up. She leaned back taking time to look around the compound while she felt her racing heart slowly stop racing. She was calming down. The lord knew how much she hated people yet the one thing she had been required to do was face people, so much for having freedom in campus. If she had to be with people them she was not free.

She smoked her cigarette letting her mind wander away to the devious dream that she had had that night. Oh the sweet voice, and his touch. It had felt so real that she was certain he had been with her that night. She did not have any explanation as to how things had gone into that direction but she knew that she had wanted more than just what she had had. She had wanted to crawl inside his hood and feel his warm skin against hers. She sighed before taking a puff. That boy would be the death of her. She knew with certainty that she was falling slowly in love with him even without knowing him or what he looked like. All she had to go on was his voice and name. That sweet baritone that had her writhing at night whenever she heard him. The sweet melody of the piano that had her thinking about all the moments she had lost without singing but just imagining how fast his fingers were gliding over the keys. Utter shame in a tint of red came over her cheeks as she realized all the things she had been thinking of were unholy and unbecoming.

"Mind if I sit with you?" She looked up to see a familiar face. She immediately knew who it was. She was the only other girl in their class that did not have a group and sat on her own most of the time. How could she not have noticed one of her kind. She nodded pulling her bag closer and creating room on the small bench for them both to sit. She looked at the girl in question from the side of her eye before taking a puff from her cigarette and blowing off the air that had accumulated in her lungs together with the smoke. She stole a glance at the girl finding her busy on her phone with air pods on her ears. she sighed with relief while she looked at the girl realizing she did not have to make conversations and small talk with her. She kept smoking and at one point she offered the girl some but she politely declined. They sat in silence and before she could even fathom it she found herself just sitting there enjoying the company that the woman was providing.

"My grandma is here. I'll see you tomorrow?" She did not wait for a response before she walked away leaving Peris conflicted by the nature of their situation ship. On one side they, or rather she, had enjoyed the company but she did not know if the girl had. She found herself walking down the steps towards the girl as she got into the car. Lucky for her the car had not moved hence she found herself once again in a position she had not expected as she was forced to face the older woman. She was lucky that the woman was kind and had already taken a liking at her even without knowing her. She waited until the back window rolled down to reveal her. She took a moment just looking at the girl and taking in her smooth face before she requested with a timid voice that she did not know she had the ability to use with a girl.

"Text me?" Peris knew that the girl would find a way. She had been sitting with her for a while and therefore she wouldn't lack a way to work out how to text her anyway. She waited until the girl nodded before she let herself step away from the car and smile before giving a small wave. Finally someone had treated her like the human she was. Even though they had barely spoke there was some kind of understanding that passed between them. She made her way towards the exit of the university feeling the heaviness in her heart slowly lifting. That together with the fact that she was looking forward to hearing AJ play, was enough to get her all psyched up. She passed by the small convenient store near campus.

She took her time making her ramen with eggs. She always ate that whenever she was feeling happy about something. She filled her bowl and decided to sit outside on her usual spot outside next to the stone wall that was separating her and her newly found 'love'. She heard the clicking of a door and she immediately knew that he had made it home. Suddenly she felt some kind of desire surge through her. She wanted to see him, to meet him and maybe spend sometime with him. He was the only other friend that she had. Not that he knew it but she was satisfied with the one sided affection that she held towards him. She heard him whistling to a tune that she did not know but either way she liked. She however heard the ringtone of a phone interrupt him and he cussed a little. Peris chuckled slightly at that. She had known him for a while and that was the first time he had ever cussed with her hearing. She found herself invested and waiting to hear what he was going to say.

"Yeah man. I'm going to call you later. I'm doing something right now." He spoke. She could feel the agitation through his voice as he spoke and she could tell that he had not been happy about the call. She had however not expected the next thing he said. She knew she had been silent and discrete therefore he did not know she was sitting there but the words he said led her to think otherwise. Peris had thought that maybe their situation ship was of a one sided thing but as it seemed it wasn't. His words had her freezing mid chewing as she took in his words.

"I want to spend sometime with some girl who sings next door so you just have to wait." She felt a warm glow come over her face and she knew that her heated cheeks were turning red. A goofy smile creeped onto her face and for another time she wished she had met him face to face. She was wishing she had let herself wait a few more seconds that day so that she could see him, but that is all what it was. A wish.