Chapter 5 Being Bored Is Wrong, But Showing Your Ass Is Too

I thought we would land and I would have to go through the cumbersome procession of entering another country, but I was wrong. I was taken off the plane at a private airport directly connected to a huge building that I later learned was the lab. And the whole complex belonged to a military base. As far as I know, they didn´t even stamp my passport.

If I had known the things they were involved in, I would never have allowed what they did to me. But, as someone told me once, everything is got its good side. Seeing how things turned out, I guess I have no regrets.

After another talk even more boring than the one we had on the plane and in which they didn´t specify much about what they´d do to me, I ended up in a room with all kinds of machines I had never seen; and right in the front, dominating everything and as if it were the observation point of the place, some kind of transparent capsule with a reflective background to which some video cameras and some strange devices seemed to point.

From all the technical talk they used, I only understood that I would go inside the chamber, they would inject me with some things and those devices would emit a type of energy that was supposed to help me heal.

For some reason, the success of the therapy depended in a big way on me thinking positive thoughts during the sessions.

Instead of scientists and qualified doctors, they seemed like a bunch of yoga teachers or a group of Wiccans talking to me about the power of evocation, since they insisted that I had to memorize certain phrases and positive ideas, in order to repeat them to myself once the process had begun.

"I know you´ve told me, but... could you explain it to me so... I understand it? What are all these gadgets? Do I really have to be inside there...? That long?" I worriedly asked the man to whom I had entrusted my fate.

"Okay, I´ll tell you," he answered with a smile on his lips. "Many, many years ago, a scientist discovered that all living things emanate a particular kind of energy... energy that, if properly channeled, can make many things possible... like healing."

"Are you a Jedi?" I thought to myself, trying to contain my laughter.

"At the time he was..."

"Ridiculed... I know the story. He spent his last days in prison."

"For fraud, yes. Well, it turns out he was right, and now we have recreated and improved his experiments."

"And you think that I´m... than I´m going to bite that?"

"It´s not..."

"What?! The power of imagination?!"

"We will also put you under a therapy of rays..."

"Now I will be the Incredible Hulk!" I exclaimed sarcastically.

"Hey, I´m serious."

"Excuse me, I´m just being a funny gir..."

He looked at me surprised at the same time that I realized my mistake.

"A funny guy. I´m just doing... just go on."

At the moment I was surprised, because there was no syntax error; but only a gender error in my choice of words.

"The electromagnetic waves to which you´ll be subjected will increase, we hope, the healing effect of the therapy and..."

"Hey, wait... wait... Those waves... aren´t those the kind of wave that cause cancer?"

"That depends on the vibration. The kind of wave we... I can´t explain it to you any easier than this: Imagine an equation where you have to figure out X. Everything else in the equation is power, multiplication, okay? If X is positive, the result is positive. If X is negative, the result will be negative. It all depends on X. And X will be your state of mind."

"And I thought it would be genetic therapy."

"Did you think an injection would transform you? That we would use stem cells? That you would regenerate yourself by altering your genes?"

I would have shrugged, but I could only look at him sternly.

"Unfortunately, that area is not perfected."

"And this other one is? Isn´t this experimental?"

A moment of silence.

"This is what we can offer you. Unless you want to risk malformations or spinal overgrowth. If you want that, you can go to another site like..."

"I get it, okay? Don´t act offended. It´s just... it seems like I am with a mad scientist."

The guy adjusted his glasses.

"Well, we are all... at least that´s what they say... a little crazy."

I looked into the chamber where I would be all those hours, and I looked rigid.

"Don´t worry. We´ll make sure you´re comfortable. Nurse..."

I was pushed from behind by a woman I couldn´t see in the direction to the elevator that would take me to the preparation and resting room.

"Just one thing, please..." I said before leaving, "at least, put some music on it. You know... something soft: Jazz, maybe."

"I´ll take care."

Something I didn´t mention my father, but surely those who really know me will understand, is the other reason why I agreed to go; and it wasn´t because maybe they could help me:

I spent years watching videos about conspiracy theories. Suddenly, after being hit by a car and left paraplegic, a mad scientist offers me a cure using technology I wasn´t even allowed to talk about. I was in the middle of a conspiracy right there! How could I not accept?!

Besides, if they could change me... whatever that meant at the time... it might be worth it.

At first, being inside the chamber was somewhat embarrassing. They made me stay there from time to time. Something like two or three hours in each session, five or six times a day. Little by little, the sessions turned each time longer. It was quite annoying to see the doctors watching me all the time, walking in front of me or through the monitors. I guess it´s the same thing patients have felt for as long as doctors have existed. But that idiot didn´t mention that I´d have to be naked. Sometimes in front of them and sometimes with my backs to them.

"Clothes... is a problem. We have to make sure we cover your entire body."

That´s great... My private parts in full view of a dozen strangers. Just what I always wanted...