Chapter 7 7

SHANE (2017)

I got into the pickup truck and slammed the door a little too hard. But instead of driving away from the school and Mel, I stared at the steering wheel.

Seven years have passed since our last meeting. That's a hell of a lot. During this time, I buried my mother, took care of my brother, said goodbye to a dream, and did a thousand other less significant things.

I had women. There were even relationships. There were shitty days when I looked for solace at the bottom of a bottle. But more often than not, I simply had no time to grieve and cherish self-pity.

I made plans, I grew up, I learned to be someone my brother wouldn't have to be embarrassed for.

But today, when I looked at her, when I talked to her, all this time suddenly disappeared somewhere. She was still the same Mel. She was still "my Wallace."

I know that she made the right decision then. I didn't agree with it, but, hell, I understood. We hurt each other, others. We violated all norms of morality and behavior.

I didn't give a crap about it. I really was ready to give up everyone and renounce everyone for Wallace. But she couldn't.

She has always been better than me.

Mel suffered with me. I let her go even though my heart was burned and turned into a pile of ashes.

I was young. It turned out that you can live with a burned heart.

I would be lying if I said that every day without her was a torment. There were days when I didn't think about her at all. Especially in college. I drank, I hung out, and I did my best with the girls. I had football and a bunch of new friends whose faces I can't even remember now.

I left Wallace behind. That was the only way I could move on.

Of course, I never completely lost sight of her. Is this possible in the age of the Internet?

I knew she married Ryan. Knew he accepted the Colorado Rapids offer and moved to Denver.

I hoped she was happy. I always wanted Mel's happiness. Of course, with me, but she decided otherwise.

A couple of months ago I read that they were getting a divorce. About Ryan's drug addiction and constant cheating. Several times I even tried to call her. But what would I say?

"Hi, this is Shane. Heard about your divorce. Do you want me to console you?"

And sometimes I wanted to send her a letter and tell her that she made a mistake and that I would never, ever trade her for another.

When she was around, I didn't notice anyone else. Others simply did not exist.

MEL (2009)

Our gang is big. Basically, these are girls from the cheerleading team and football players. We always hang out togethers, but these rules have been established long before us - a school hierarchy that is never violated.

Athletes with cheerleaders, theater-geeks, goths, environmentalists, dancers.

Two large tables are moved to the center of the school cafeteria, which are taken by all of us - popular kids. And every day, Shane and I are forced to sit at the same table, because whether we like it or not, we are in the same party.

His presence greatly spoils my appetite. With great pleasure I would flip the contents of my tray on his head!

The guys at our table are discussing the upcoming game and the line of defense that Coach Malkin has suggested. And also an after party at CJ - our receiver.

Only Keller wasn't not taking a part in this conversation, and was staring gloomily at his plate and around. He did not look at me, although yesterday he was ready to strangle me with his bare hands.

The girls, as always, were gossiping about something: who is sleeping with whom, who is cheating on whom, who got drunk at the last party and vomited all around. Details were savored with special predilection.

Erin Lichfield, who always knows everything, didn't not stop for a second. Told about a sophomore from the choir group who has an affair with a teacher from college.

I barely listened to this while unenthusiastically poking around in my lasagna. In fact, this was more of the overcooked dough, sour sauce and half-burned cheese.

"Will you come tonight?" Ryan whispered in my ear and stroked my back with a warm hand.

I smiled: it felt nice - his touches, kisses. He knows how to please me and always makes sure I feel comfortable.

"Of course."

He ran his hand up my spine and I laughed as I leaned forward. He rubbed his nose against my cheek, then caught my mouth with his lips.

Everything inside me kept on melting and melting.

The sharp sound of a chair being pushed across the linoleum drew our attention.

Keller grabbed his tray of almost untouched food, said "I'm off" and left. I noticed Ray was giving him a thoughtful, long look.

"And what will we do when I come over to your place?" I tried to get my boyfriend's attention back.

Ryan smirked defiantly.

"We will be bad. Very very bad."

***

The news spreaded around the school with the speed of light. When I was in a socialization class, Sky sent me a message:

"Fun: Shane and Trish were caught hooking up in the library. Poor Miss Marsh, it's such a trauma for her!"

The students in the class began to whisper, and I realized that soon the whole school is gonna be buzzing like a disturbed beehive from an exciting incident.

I hid my phone without answering Skyler.

It seemed that for the sake of Trish Keller betrayed his principles, they had sex twice (that I know of).

Mrs. Norris, our teacher, made a notice to the noisiest guys - everyone was interested in the details and what will happen to the loving couple now.

I tried to focus on the lesson, but kept getting distracted.

Why am I even thinking about Keller and Trish? What do I care what they do when they're alone?

I don't like my feelings at all. I don't find it funny or amusing.

It's disgusting. Everything Shane Keller does is gross.

I squeezed the pen as hard as I could, I was annoyed. Even if he fucked every citizen of this city, what would I care?

And the fact that he was attracted to Trish has its advantages: he will have less time to pester me. Ryan and I will be able to spend more time alone together.

No, that's definitely good.

But for some reason my stomach still shrinked from that thought.

Why is this happening? I don't even want to think.

***

"Erin said they were called to the principal. Carpenter was furious, but what could she really do? It's Keller - she can't suspend him because he's needed at the game, and Trish... Well, Shane will get her out of trouble as well," Skye was talking non-stop as I drove her home after school. Her parents punished her for catching her smoking and took her car away for a month, forcing her to use the school bus.

But it just so happens that you can be counted as a loser if they notice that you use public transport, so the girls and I take turns driving Skyler.

Unfortunately, it was my turn today, and I had to listen to Sky ramble nonstop about the biggest incident of the month.

"Did it happen during a lunch break?" I asked when my friend paused for a second to take a puff.

"Yes, when we were all in the canteen. Shane took off before everyone else. Most likely, he and Trish planned this out in advance."

"And what, Carpenter won't even call their parents to school?" I tried to make my voice sound indifferent, but I gloatingly kept the hopes to myself that they won't get away with it like that.

It wouldn't hurt to put Keller in his place, and it would be useful to bring down a little arrogance with Trish.

"I don't know, I think Carpenter will do something, otherwise everyone will lose their fear and start using the school as a love motel."

"Give it to me." I took the cigarette away from Skye and took a puff. Actually, I don't smoke, but ... now everything infuriates me!

Skyler surprisingly stared at me.

"What is wrong with you"

"I just wanted to," I shrugged my shoulders with an indifferent look. "I'm on my period, maybe that's the reason."

The excuse was lame, but my friend decided not to ask for clarifications, and I calmed down. I hated to admit it's because of Shane.

Well, really, what the hell is going on?

I'm in love with Ryan. We haven't confessed it to each other yet, but I don't think we'll have to wait long. Although he is a friend of Keller, they are different. Ryan is cheerful, kind and gentle with me. And Shane... is a surly, cynical bastard.

He treats me so badly! Hates me, even though I didn't deserve it.

He himself declared war on me. So why am I...thinking about him more than I need to? And these thoughts confuse me.

I dropped Skye off, and headed home. I had a few hours before I had to head to Ryan's. I planned on doing my homework, studying for the algebra test, and putting any thoughts of Keller out of my head.

"Hello, honey!" Mom appeared from the kitchen when I ran up the stairs. "How are things at school?"

I turned around, holding on to the railing, my fingers squeezed the varnished wood a little too tight.

"Good. As always." I forced myself to put a smile on my face so that my mother does not suspect something and does not arrange "heart-to-heart talks".

"Do you want to eat?"

"Nah, school had great lasagna for lunch, I'm full."

Mom nodded.

"OK then."

She returned to the kitchen, and I hid in my room in the hope that no one would disturb me for the next couple of hours.

I arranged my textbooks around me and tried to solve the problems that Mr. Lebowski has given (the students call him - Spit, because he spits while talking and it is better not to come close), but I was so confused that I quickly gave up futile attempts.

I pushed my books and notebooks onto the edge of the bed and lay on my back, staring up at the ceiling until it started to get dark outside.

***

At seven o'clock I pulled up in Ryan's driveway and swore loudly cause I saw Shane's Chevrolet Camaro. So he was here, even though Ryan and I were supposed to spend the evening alone. I was hoping there would be just the two of us.

The fact that his parents are away most of the year, is, of course, convenient. But it also gives a certain discomfort, because there is always someone else hanging out and disturbing us. Especially Keller, who generally feels at home there.

I was disappointed, but there's nothing to do. I got out of the car and walked towards the house with a heavy heart.

I hoped he gets out of here and Ray and I could have a nice evening.

I dressed up nicely, counting on the fact that I will be alone with my boyfriend. I put on a black short skirt and a top without a bra. Hair - absolutely smooth and shiny - lies on the back. I was even wearing make-up brighter than usual.

I wanted to be beautiful for Ryan and I was going with such enthusiasm. After being in a bad mood all day, only a meeting with Ray could fix it.

For some time now, I had the key to the house, and Ryan asked me to come in without knocking. It took me a while to get used to it, but now I feel much more confident.

Yet this time, I hesitated before entering. Because I knew I'll see Shane there, which I really didn't want.

I took a few deep breaths and only then turned the knob.

Ryan's family is rich. His father is a politician and although he spends most of the year in the capital, they decided not to sell the house in Utah - one day his service will end, and the parents plan to return to Payson, that's what at least Ryan says.

They have a big house with a swimming pool and a guest house. This is another reason why guys like to hang out here.

The house was quiet, but I could hear conversations from the backyard. I went to the living room, from which there is access to the pool. There is a blue glow from the water, but there is no one in the pool itself. Shane and Trish were having a good time in the jacuzzi.

- Hey, hi, Mel! - Trish waved cheerfully at me. Keller didn't say anything, just gave me an indifferent look before pulling the girl back to him.

A wave of indignation rose in me, my cheeks turned crimson.

What the hell are they doing here?!

I was bursting when I went looking for Ryan. My boyfriend was in his room, getting dressed after taking a shower. He was still half naked, wearing only jeans, and I could see his perfect torso. However, I was not in the mood to appreciate it.

"Hi, babe!"

Ryan was smiling. He took a T-shirt out of the dresser and pulled it on.

I was gloomily silent.

"What happened?"

He noticed that something was wrong and approached me.

"We were supposed to spend this evening together." I didn't even try to hide the displeasure in my voice.

Ray sighed.

"We'll do it. The house is big, Mel, we won't interfere with each other." He raised his hand and caressed my cheek gently. "I couldn't kick them out - they can't go to Shane or Trish."

I wanted to say that Keller takes advantage of his kindness too often, but I kept my mouth shut.

"You are so beautiful today," He whispered, moving closer and touching my temple with his lips.

I closed my eyes and, enjoying the sensations, thawed.

Maybe I was worried for nothing. We didn't have to spend time with these two.

"I want you so much, baby," Ryan mumbled in a hollow voice, slipping his hand up my skirt.

I felt my body respond, and warmth ran down my spine, gathering between my thighs.

My eyes were closed, a quiet, agitated breath escaped through my lips.

Ryan got down on his knees, pulled up my skirt and slid my panties down my legs. Then his mouth caressed me, and I bit my lips to keep from making loud noises.

Holding on to his shoulders because I needed support. My legs got weak as I approached an orgasm. I tilted my head back and bit my lip until it hurt, pushing my hips towards him.

At the moment of the brightest and sharpest pleasure, when pleasure pierced me, I saw what I should not be seeing; I thought about things I shouldn't be thinking about.

Not at this moment!

No!

"Fucking bastard! I hate it! Hate you!"