Chapter 7 •7•The Shock

I was shocked. "What! Day after tomorrow?" I almost shouted which caught everyone's attention.

"Mom whatsoever happens I'm not marrying day after tomorrow and that's it." Radhs continued shouting.

"You can't do that Radhs. The Invites are sent, guests have arrived, the media from all over the country is called, Ranbir's family is ready, he loves you and they are accepting you despite your despicable choice of profession, what else do you want?"

"Freedom!" She yelled again. "Freedom from all this. Freedom to pursue my dreams. Freedom from your disgusting mentality that I've fallen prey to." She almost choked on her tears and I rushed to give her water.

"Radhs, please calm down don't-"

"No, I won't Jivi. I am not getting married tomorrow. That's it."

"You will Radhika. Cause if you don't, I'll kill myself." Chachi said, shocking all of us.

"Preet. What are you-?" Chachu tried to intervene but Chachi was adamant.

"No Ji. I better die than cancel this marriage. From the day this girl was born, I had only one dream, to see her becoming a bride, settling down and securing her future. But today, if my dream breaks, I don't think I will be able to face the society, the relatives, and Ranbir's family. Ever since childhood,, she did everything against my wishes. Now when for the first time, I asked her something, why can't she give it to me." Chachi was on the verge of breaking down herself. She had been strong for too long. "This is my last decision."

"Radhika... Now you decide. Tomorrow, it is either your 'Doli' (palanquin in which bride is carried to her in-laws home after marriage) or my 'Arthi' (palanquin in which a dead person is carried to the cremation ground)"

With those words, she walked away. Maybe because she didn't want to break down in front of us.

And Chachu followed trying to pacify Chachi.

Abhi went to his room and I was about to do the same when Radhs caught my hand. "Jivi please." She pleaded crying but Chachi's words rang in my ears.

I gently removed my hands from hers and she was shocked. I had tears of helplessness in my eyes. "I'm sorry Radhs. I've lost my parents once and I don't have the courage to face that pain twice." With those words, I ran to my room cause if I stayed, I knew Radhs' tears would break me.

That was a night filled with pain for all of us. I was crying for my sister, Radhs for her dreams and Chachu and Chachi broke to see their upbringing being on the wrong path.

God knows what will happen next. Whom should I favor?

-Next evening-

We were all doing preparations half-heartedly. Today is the wedding, in a few hours.

I went to Radhs' room to see if she was ready. I went to the room and saw that she was on the bed with a comforter covering her completely. She has this weird habit. Whenever she is tense, she'll just curl up herself in the fetal position and go inside the bedsheets and stay there for hours. I sat beside her on the bed.

"Radhs, I know you're upset but trust me there is nothing to worry so much about. Ranbir loves you and he can do anything for your happiness. All you have to do is ask, tell him. That's all. Now come on. Get up and get ready. The Baraat will be on their way. Your Prince Charming is coming for you." My heart broke again. Her Prince Charming. Her Ranbir.

Saying this, I removed the sheets and to my shock Radhs wasn't there.

"Radhs!" I said in shock. I checked the washroom, and balcony but she wasn't there. Have mercy God! Don't let it be what I'm thinking.

My eyes moved to the dressing table where I saw a neatly folded letter. I opened it with shivering hands. It read,

'Jivi,

I know you will be the one getting this. Look, I'm really not the sacrifice-everything-for-family or suffer-in-silence type. I love Ranbir a lot and I promise I will come back and marry him, just like mom wants but not now. Now, he is not my love, but a barrier standing in between me and my dreams. That's why I am leaving. My dreams are waiting for me and I can't disappoint them. I can't disappoint the girl I promised myself to become one day.'

With that, my knees lost it and I fell on the floor in shock.

What have you done Radhs! How could you!

I looked at the letter and it sent tremors through my body. What now? I shuddered at the thought of anybody coming to know about this. Everything will be finished. Everyone will be so devastated. Down there people are calling for the bride. What do I do now? What have you done Radhs?

I placed the heavy bridal lehenga on the bed and rushed outside to call for Chachi. Only she can help me with all this now. I can't even imagine the agony she will feel when she'll come to know. I put the sheets back like before and locked the door of Radhs' bedroom properly so that even if anyone comes here they don't see Radhs missing.

What to do first? I thought, wiping the beads of sweat on my forehead. Ok, first, I go and inform Chachi about this and we'll together see what to do. I rushed down the fully decorated stairs where everyone was waiting. The grand Mandap (aisle) was set in the middle of the hall, fully decorated with flowers and Panditji waiting for the groom and bride to arrive.

My eyes searched for Chachi and then, to my relief, I found her, scolding a waiter near the pillar. She is looking so beautiful, graceful and most of all... happy. She wore a beautiful off-white saree with a golden border, her beautiful hairs falling off her shoulder.

I don't even remember the last time I saw her wearing a saree. She prefers Punjabi suits and wears saree only on special occasions. And today is the biggest occasion of her life–her most beloved daughter's wedding. I walked to her carefully. I shouldn't panic. I shouldn't let anyone doubt that something is fishy.

"Where the hell were you? And why is everybody so slow today huh? Jaldi jaldi haath chalao! (Get your hands working faster?) It's my daughter's wedding. Nobody's hands should be empty and-"

"Chachi?" I said in a hushed whisper.

"Yes Jivi? Is Radhika ready or does she again have issues?" Chachi asked, creases forming on her forehead.

"Ya. She is insulting everyone. The makeup artist, the hair stylist, the designer and all. Up there." I said pointing to her room.

Chachi face palmed herself angrily. "Haaye rabba! Ye bewakoof ladki! (This silly girl) come." Saying this, she started striding towards Radhs' room. I wiped the tear that escaped. My poor Chachi. Within seconds, the castle of her dreams and expectations was going to collapse leaving nothing behind.

She reached Radhs' room and saw it latched from outside. "Is she getting ready in your room?" Chachi asked me, smiling.

I slowly opened the room, guided her inside, locked the door and handed the letter Radhs had written. I was crying by now. "I'm sorry Chachi. I should have taken care of her." But Chachi's face was blank. She let the letter slip and held the chair of the dressing table for support. God. I can't see her like this.

"Chachi Please... don't-"

"Jivi... when in the newspapers and news channels I used to read the news of parents committing suicide because of children running away, I used to get angry at them for being so weak. Now I realize how they must have felt." She said in a monotonous, her face dull, tears still flowing from her eyes.

I hugged her tight from behind, "You did nothing wrong Chachi. You wanted the best for Radhs but she-"

"No Jivi. It's my fault. It's all my fault." Chachi said loudly. "I didn't give her a good upbringing. I didn't inculcate good values in her. How will I face everyone now?" She said and burst out crying while hugging me. "Why didn't I die before seeing this day?" She sobbed. My Chachi was crying. I've never seen her crying before today. I've been with her for 12 years .i.e. 144 months, 4360 days, 104640 hours. Never. I hate you for doing this Radhs.

I wiped my tears and said, "Chachi, you please wait here and I'll go and get Chachu. He can get us out of this mess." I said and was about to leave when Chachi held my hand with both hands, "no Jivi." She said totally panicked. "He won't be able to handle it. We can't do this. Vo toot jayenge. (He'll get shattered.)" Fear evident in her teary eyes.

'Stay strong Jivi. You're all they have got now.' I told myself.

I held her hands and said, "Chachi, this is inevitable. Imagine the pain he would feel if he came to know this truth from someone else. We don't want that to happen right. Please." Saying this, I freed my hands and rushed outside to find Chachu. Where is he now? I searched the whole mansion but didn't find him. And with every passing moment my panic increased. Finally, I found him at the entrance arranging everything for the Baraat's (groom's family procession) welcome. I walked to him but he was busy.

"Chachu I-"

"Wait a minute Jivi." He told me to wait and walked to a lady in a black dress with her face completely covered. He took out a 2000 rupee note from his pocket and called her, "listen miss." She didn't even turn around so Chachu himself walked to her. "Here take this. I have heard that God listens to the poor people's prayers very soon. No one should go empty handed from here. Today is my beloved daughter's wedding. Take this and give blessings to my princess for a wonderful life."

The lady just nodded and took out her fingers from the black dupatta to take the money and I noticed her fingers were decorated with beautiful, fresh Mehendi which looked like it was recently applied.

Chachu turned to the wedding planner and handed him a Cheque, "this money is to be donated to the poor and needy people who come here. You'll get your money after the ceremony." He said and turned to me, "yes Jivi, you wanna say something."

I couldn't muster the courage now. He is so happy. He saw my tensed expression and held my face in his hands, "beta, is everything alright?"

I held his hands and said, "Come with me Chachu", my voice betraying me.

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