Chapter 3

Finn lay on the cold floor, shivering.

He reached up a small, trembling hand and touched my arm on the bed.

"Daddy, are you still mad at Mom?" he whispered.

His voice was hoarse.

"She... she said she wished you would disappear."

Tears welled in his eyes again.

"But I don't want you to disappear, Daddy. I need you."

I yearned to answer him, to hold him, to tell him I was right there.

But I was just a whisper of air, a cold spot in the room.

He stayed there for a long time, talking to my lifeless body.

Telling me about his fall, about Laura's anger.

He didn't understand. He just knew something was terribly wrong.

After a while, his shivering became more intense.

He had to get help. For me.

He got up, his movements slow and pained.

His head must have been throbbing.

He crept out of the house again, into the pre-dawn gloom.

This time, he headed towards the main road, in the direction of the small, 24-hour clinic a few blocks further than the bookstore.

He was a small, determined figure, limping down the empty street.

I followed, a silent, anxious guardian.

A pair of headlights appeared, coming fast.

Too fast.

"Finn! Look out!" I screamed in my mind.

It was Julian's car. I recognized the dent in the fender.

And Julian was behind the wheel.

He saw Finn.

His face, illuminated by the dashboard lights, was a mask of cold fury.

He swerved, aiming directly for my son.

Finn froze, a deer in the headlights.

He was too small, too slow.

The car bore down on him.

I threw myself in front of Finn, a useless, spectral shield.

The car passed right through me.

Julian wrenched the wheel at the last second, the tires screaming.

He missed Finn by inches.

The wind of its passage buffeted Finn, knocking him off his feet.

He landed hard on the gravel shoulder of the road.

He lay there, stunned, gasping for breath.

The car screeched to a halt a little way down the road.

Julian got out.

He walked back towards Finn, his expression unreadable in the dim light.

I hovered over Finn, trying to will him to get up, to run.

But he was too terrified.

Julian stopped a few feet away.

"Well, well. What have we here?" Julian said, his voice dripping with false concern.

"Little Finn O'Connell, out for an early morning stroll?"

Finn scrambled backwards, crab-like, trying to get away.

His eyes were wide with terror. He knew. He knew Julian was not a friend.

He remembered the burn on his hand, "accidental" on the stove.

He remembered being locked in the garage.

Julian had done those things when Laura wasn't looking.

"What's wrong, Finn? Cat got your tongue?" Julian taunted.

He took a step closer.

"Are you hurt? Did you fall down?"

Finn shook his head, unable to speak.

"Tell you what," Julian said, a cruel smile playing on his lips. "If you tell me where your daddy keeps his good tools, the expensive ones, I'll take you to get some breakfast."

He was trying to get Finn to betray me, even now.

Finn just stared at him, his small face pale.

"No? Not hungry?" Julian sighed dramatically. "Okay, new deal. If you tell me that your daddy is a no-good, cheating liar, I'll... I'll think about not telling your mommy you were out wandering the streets alone again."

He wanted Finn to insult me. To break his spirit.

Finn's lower lip trembled, but he set his small jaw.

"My daddy is a good man," he whispered, his voice fierce. "He's the best daddy."

A flicker of something dark crossed Julian's face.

Rage.

He lunged forward and grabbed Finn by the arm, hauling him to his feet.

"You little brat!" Julian snarled, his charming facade gone. "You're just like him! Stubborn and stupid!"

He shook Finn hard. Finn's head snapped back and forth.

"No! Stop it!" I yelled, trying to push Julian away, but my hands passed through him.

Useless. I was so utterly useless.

Julian backhanded Finn across the face.

The sound was sickeningly loud in the quiet morning.

Finn cried out, a sharp, terrified sound.

He stumbled, but Julian held him up by his arm, his fingers digging in like claws.

"You think your daddy can protect you now?" Julian sneered, his face close to Finn's. "He's gone, you little whelp. And you're next."

He was going to kill him. He was going to kill my son.

"Please," I begged, my spectral voice unheard. "Leave him alone! Take me! Do whatever you want to me, just leave my son!"

I would have made any bargain, suffered any torment, to save Finn.

Julian dragged Finn towards the car.

Finn struggled, kicking and twisting, but he was no match for Julian's strength.

"Let me go!" Finn screamed. "You're a bad man! A very bad man!"

Julian laughed, a harsh, ugly sound.

"Bad? Oh, you have no idea, kid."

He opened the passenger door and shoved Finn inside.

Finn landed awkwardly, hitting his head on the dashboard.

He lay still for a moment, dazed.

Julian got into the driver's seat and started the engine.

He looked over at Finn, who was now trying to open the door.

Child lock. Of course.

"Don't even think about it," Julian said, his voice cold.

He pulled out onto the road, driving fast.

Not towards the clinic. Not towards home.

He was heading out of town, towards the old quarry road.

A deserted place.

My fear was a living thing, coiling in my non-existent stomach.

He was going to kill Finn. And no one would ever know.