Chapter 4 THE KISS I WASN'T EXPECTING

It was a joke. I had teased him about giving me a kiss and i never expected him to take me seriously. We were walking to the after lecture hall and was just strolling around. The usual lazy stroll as we were not prepared to sit down in another classroom as of yet. The sun was setting and it casted everything in a golden glaze. and that was when the words came out of my mouth. ''you should kiss me.'' i said half laughing expecting him to throw a witty response or at least roll his eyes and walk away but he did not.

He stopped to look at me for a few second before his lips came to meet mine and i froze. my heart racing, and i was shocked. I wanted to smile and say something but before i could react a voice interrupted us. Lisa. she had seen everything and just like that it was no longer our moment. even though he did not say anything i knew for sure this was everything.

After classes I killed time by rearranging my wardrobe. At some point I knew I would have to go out to meet with the study group, but for the time being I was hoping to catch one person in particular, which was Nath. I am not sure how obvious I was being by always trying to be close to him but i did not care especially anytime i heard his voice.

I knew it was in a way that did not make sense. It was nothing logical and it was something i could not explain but i had a feeling.

I started getting nervous around him, i paid attention to my outfits, I did not think twice before responding to his texts but i read them twice and i smiled whenever his name pops up on my screen.

Our first "date," if it could even be called that, was nothing spontaneous. He just texted me to ask if i wanted to grab a late night snack because he was hungry and i said yes. We came back to my place and talked for hours. sleep did not matter at that time for me. Although we had lectures by 7:30 am it did not stop us from sitting in his car till 3am talking and making out most of the time. We drove on the empty streets of campus. Just the two of us with the night as our companion. The car was filled with music, conversations that never really ended and kisses which left me thinking if he knew what he was doing to me.

This became a ritual and it made me believe he felt something too because he showed up. He would leave his place and come to mine to come spend some time with me no mater what time it was. H e always texted first and he always texted more. when ever we were together he always founds was to tell me ''you are very pretty.'' I knew i was falling for him but i had no clue if he will catch me. i loved the way he always said it, effortlessly without thinking and no matter how many times he said it always got to me.

We never talked about what happened that night. It was just like a normal day. we talked and pretended like nothing happened the previous night stretching to this morning. If someone had been watching from that night they would not see the difference because everything seemed casual. Yet it was not. maybe it was not for me. something felt off and i was not sure what it was. Maybe it was the way my heart beat faster when i was around him or maybe it was how i stared at him when he spoke. Maybe it was when i became self aware anytime he was around me or how i dressed to impress. it was not my usual. Maybe it was the fact that i could not get the image of us kissing out of my head, how he bent down to my height because he was more taller than me. or was it the way his lips met mine without hesitation?

If our first kiss had been a Suprise and our second was a spore of the moment the third was not. We were in class with our friends. having conversations and laughing which should have been like any other time but it was different because he did it again, without warning this time and right in front of everyone. he did not hesitate and he did not keep it as a secret. i froze immediately his lips met mine. my face flushed with heat and embarrassment as i was sure our friends had seen it. he was not hiding this time and my heart pounded and mind raced and all i could think of was what he just did. and it meant something, it had to mean something.

Before i could react i heard Laughters, whistles and shouts coming from our friends with Lisa saying ''Eiii, so it is like this? is this what you people have been doing instead of studying? her voice ringing in my ears.

I almost prayed for the ground to open and swallow me. I wanted to disappear or at least hide my red face but there was no where to run to but Nath stood there with no regret on his face, as though he wanted this to happen. I glanced at his brother who just smiled at me as though he knew it will happen. I should have known too because the truth is that even though Nath and i have known each other for a short time he treated me differently. He was more attentive and thoughtful towards me. Brings me snacks even though i said it was not necessary, complimented me in ways that never felt like empty words, went out of his way to make sure i was fine. . I never knew it was more than kindness but now i know and there is no denying it. He was not hiding it and i would not hide it too.