Chapter 5 PREGNANT

"Well? Check it out already so that we can join the rest. We are about to be called to serve the guests." Julie pleads with me because I have been reticent to check the damn thing for a couple of minutes now.

My heart is throbbing like a marathon inside its cage. I am growing weaker with every single second that passes by. I can't breathe properly. The anxiety and uncertainty of what lies ahead if this turns positive are killing me.

I swear I have never felt this worried and skeptical in my whole twenty-one years of age. I am a nervous wreck, but as Julie said, we have no time. We just sneaked out as the Mazurs engaged in welcoming their guests, and I am sure they are done with the formalities and salutations by now.

With a throbbing heart and feeble legs, I stroll a few centimeters into the bathroom where the kit is lying-the kit that holds the fate of my life from this moment on. My life from now on depends on what the results are. I would like to make a brief prayer, but aside from racing against time, I think this is something that doesn't involve God. It doesn't. It's all about me and Ray and our blind love.

With an oscillating sweaty hand, I grab the kit and clench it as I lift my head to the skies. I dare not murmur a word. I just needed to feel God's presence in my life right now; that will be an assurance that, despite the outcome, nothing will go wrong. All will be well.

"Come on, Irma!" Julie fondles my shoulder, urging me to end this anxiety once and for all.

And I heeded her plea.

I open my palm, both our eyes rushing to the kit.

At first glance, I flinch, fighting hard against the cold chills that threaten to immobilize my body. The ozone layers must have closed up a bit, limiting the air. I hold my breath.

I blink a few times, and then I sprint my eyes to the kit again. It's still crystal clear.

I would love to discharge the breath I am holding, but I suddenly forgot how to breathe. My head spins to a complete degree, reality sinking in savagely.

"Oh. My. God! Irma!" Julie clamors in disbelief.

"I...am pregnant!" I whimper with an assortment of feelings and notions. Suddenly I feel something close to fear, and my uncertainty skyrockets again.

I am pregnant!

"But he loves you, right? You are sure of his love, right?" Julie queries.

She is in the same shocked state as me.

"I am." I respond faintly, concealing any doubts I may have about this. He loves me, but he is not ready to profess our love to his family. That complicates everything. Everything.

"I hope you are right and that Mr. Rayson will handle this well. Otherwise, I do not want to imagine what will happen, Irma." Julie says, and that stings like hell.

I understand where she is coming from. If Ray doesn't take the mantle and take full responsibility, I am doomed. Perhaps for good! Worse will be his family's learning about this pregnancy. It will be a total disaster.

"I don't know what you are planning, but you need to tell him asap. You both need to sort this out before it blows out of proportion." Julie adds.

I know, and that's if it hasn't already. I should talk to him as soon as possible. Maybe the baby will give him the courage he needs to face his family.

"I will. I will talk to Ray tonight after dinner. But just a pinky, please, Julie, don't make the mistake of telling this to anyone. No one should know about this, okay?"

"Know about what?"

Shit! Double shit!!

We both snap at the door where Ray stands, tall and bold, calm and cold, exuding glamour, dominance, and sovereignty like always. This look can leave any woman drooling over him even without him making an effort. He is pure enchantment. A total charm for any straight woman.

And his strides, when he moves like now, echo with glueing sparks, glueing you to the spot, waiting to be devoured.

"What is that that no one is supposed to know?" He queries me as he seals me beneath his adorable tall frame, his eyes scanning through mine, his sweet pheromones threatening to lure me into committing another sin right here.

"Excuse me, Sir Rayson. I will leave you two alone." Julie says, throwing me a look that says, "This is the right time," before she strides out of my room.

Is it?

"Babe? What do you want to talk about after dinner?" He queries me again while I am battling with my inner self.

Hug? How much did he hear?

"Did you hear anything else?" I implore, earning a cocked eyebrow from him.

He watches me for a while, studying my face like he is studying for a final exam. I swallow hard, averting my gaze from his eyes a little.

"Yes!" That summoned my gaze back to him. We lock our eyes. "Why? Is there anything you didn't want me to hear?" He implores, locking the gap between us.

I shake my head in a bold move, as if I am not lying. So he heard?

I fall into his arms, per his invitation. He embodies me in his loving arms, tightening his hold on me as if he will never let me go. Which I hope he will never do.

After a long moment of intimate hugging, he pulls away but keeps me in his embrace, and I savor this moment with all that I have. It feels so sweet. It's pure heaven to be in his arms like this.

"Why did you come here?" I ask, snuggling closer to him, jerking my head a little from his comfortable chest, and peering up to meet his eyes.

"It's getting intense out there. I just needed this." He responds, pulling me a little closer as he searches for my lips.

I don't demur. I am still wondering why he is not saying anything if he indeed heard it all, but I will push that thought aside and just do this for now. His kisses always blow my mind. They calm me in every situation. They always work like magic, and today is no exception. I get lost in it. We both do until we can no longer breathe.

We break away, sloping our heads against each other as we gasp for air, trying to steady our breathing.

"You've always handled such meetings and events well. What's different today?" I implore between rocky breaths, caressing his jaws with my thumbs.

"Everything is different today." He responds faintly, searching my eyes.

That sparked masses of curiosity in me.

"Everything? What's bringing about this difference?" I implore.

He takes a long blink and heaves out a very heavy sigh that worries me more. This seems so heavy. But what could it be?

"It's not like anything I have handled before. This is different. It's...complicated." The heavy weight of his tone explains just how heavy this load is.

I don't know anything about striking and closing deals, but I know he is good at what he does. If this is a deal, no matter how complicated it is, he will find a way around it.