Chapter 3 3:In Pain

Waking up I feel like I was pinned, I stared up the circular pattern in the ceiling,the feeling of hungry, drained and exhausted.

I was looking forward to a new day, one where I could either hide in my room or face the public and describe what everyone had witnessed the previous day as Jacob and I held hands in the boat in plain view of the rest of the pack. Although it was completely innocent, other people probably wouldn't agree.

My heart was devastated by what happened yesterday. Without realizing it, the canoe had drifted right up to the Pack House and was now exactly in front of the rear yard, where everyone was looking at us.

He was giving us and me such an intense look that it made me shudder.

Thankfully, no one could see my face up close, red-rimmed, puffy eyes on display.

Then Jacob managed to snap me out of it, forcing me to help paddle us back to the dock, trees obstructing our view of the other wolves once we got far enough down the bank.

I think I'm just going to lie in bed today. I didn't want to have to face anyone. The embarrassment of not only being caught in an intimate position with my best friend but also having my mate taken from me by a one-night stand with another female was too much to bare.

I was mortified to have to deal with my friend being taken away from me, despite the fact that the pack was giving them ugly glances as I observed the celebrations through my bedroom window that day.

If only he had waited for his mate,and that's me. I would not have to suffer.

Everyone felt sorry for me now that they were aware of the specifics. The seventeen-year-old, Beta-blooded juvenile, who had just switched, was unfortunate for meeting the Alpha's first-born son so quickly. It was difficult to watch the wolf he brought back to the pack as she gave birth to their wolf-pup in her womb. I would get the pitying looks from everyone. I simply know it.

I'm confident that eventually the wolf the Moon Goddess created for me will leave his mark on another female because she became pregnant while under the influence of heat. One day, she'll be the Luna, the role that was only for me.

However, none of that was important to me; all I wanted was my mate. In school, we learned about the importance of the mate bond and how it sensitive all other types of emotions. We also learned that your mate is a gift from the moon who enhances your personality. They were the one you were always drawn to since they were your other half.

The attraction of the mate bond cannot be defeated. Our parents have to keep us under watch because when a female is in heat, her mate will smash through walls to get to her. Every female's favorite perfume, it is every man's fluid.

When my turn came, I'd have to hide myself, from any other man,from my mate.

I'm unsure of what transpired with my mate's relationship to that female, but I do know that I'm grateful that the Alpha and Luna and their family live on a different section of the property so that I wouldn't have to scent my mate and the other wolf.

I would die from it.

I froze in place when I heard a knock on my door because I was terrified of who it might be. I was so preoccupied with my thoughts that I didn't even hear or smell him coming.

"Hey Bella,"

"Are you there? "

"Here is Jacob"

My legs buckled a little under my weight as I pushed the covers off of my body and headed toward the door while rolling my eyes. I had yet to be able to eat. He quickly entered after unlocking the door, his hands covered in dried blood and his arms covered in slashes.

"What took place to you?" As my brows rose in my hairline, I gaped, gazing him up and down while covering my mouth with my palm. I could tell he was in bad shape because I knew it had to have happened in the previous ten minutes, which is just enough time for the blood to avoid clotting.

With a proud smirk on his scarcely scarred face, he shut the door and leaned against it. "I will talk to my brother,he's to much! "

Although my mouth opened, I kept quiet. I was unwilling to learn. He did exhibit signs of self-confidence. I felt the urge to support his ego in some way.

Jacob said, "You didn't have to do that." I shook my head as I noticed his expression waning slightly. I couldn't help but smile as my lips tipped higher. But I'm grateful. For advocating on my behalf. You are truly the greatest.

In the blink of an eye, his grin returned as he quickly walked to my closet and started throwing clothing at me.

Just before my hands could catch it, a frock flew towards me and hit me in the face." What the hell, Jacob! "

"Dress yourself. We will descend to eat breakfast. He emerged from my closet and grinned. Despite having just engaged in a fight, he appeared decent. If he was that joyful, he must have triumphed.

I shook my head as I began to get anxiety. I was reluctant to meet everyone. I was merely unprepared.

"Yes." I looked at him in horror as he gave the command while standing in front of me. "And after my workout, we're going for a run. You require it. Your wolf needs it."

Jacob had a point there. Since my initial shift, I have not transformed, and I was unaware of how my wolf felt. I was aware of her superior strength. My feelings were consistent, and every now and then, I would sense her rage and hostility mixed with a yearning sadness, but I couldn't sense what she was thinking exactly. I had no idea what she could be able to do. Especially considering that she currently outpaces me in strength. She might take charge. I knew it was a possibility, but the first time I made sure to spend hours in wolf form so I could test my restraint with my wolf.

However, there is always a chance.

How would my wolf react to rivals?

"Jacob, I don't believe that's a good idea." He averted his blue eyes from me as I cautiously glanced up at him. He slightly bowed down and put his hands on my shoulders.

"You'll be alright. You are strong, Bella."

I simply shook my head, uncertain of both his words and of myself.

His eyes narrowed and his features abruptly hardened as he stood upright. "Dress yourself. No point in debating it. At some point, you have to deal with them. You need to pretend as though you're not ready even though I know you are. If you hide your face, they will merely continue to speak for longer. I have you with me. I'll divert anyone's attention. Use me as a shield. Now go. "

I fixed my gaze on the tall man who had been my boyhood best buddy. He was my protector as a boy growing into a man, but he didn't get what it was like to have your heart torn out.

He was interested in what other people thought of me.

I adored him for wanting me to have courage.

I nodded while holding the dress close to my body and turned into the bathroom to change with tears in my eyes. The only person who genuinely cared for me was Jacob. My parents would probably be concerned as well, but I was too ashamed to approach them. Jacob protected me as if he were my own brother.

When I imagined that everyone was looking at me, discussing my sorry fate among themselves, and feeling his scorching gaze on my flesh, my breathing got heavier and I felt the familiar tightness in my stomach.

How am I going to handle this humiliation? Observing him with who ought to be me? Observing them like a family?

Yet Jacob was accurate.

This had to be done. Two weeks have passed since then; if not now, then when? I would eventually have to confront them.

Both of them. Them.

Their names made me feel horrible; I can't even utter them.

Jacob whistled softly as I emerged from the restroom wearing my favorite yellow-green dress and loose curls in my hair.

"Look at you, you're dressed. That's what I like, Bella. ". He cocked his head to the side and wrinkled his nose. "You know," I think it might be too short and your legs are,you know,noticeable! " He was thoughtfully evaluating me. His big brother ego was in charge.

I put on my sandals while rolling my eyes. "Shifting out of a dress is quicker, and I'm not changing. Let's go." I was secretly relieved that he thought this garment was "too short." That indicated to my friend that it would be far too brief. Even if it meant embarrassing myself in the process, I just wanted to show him what he was missing.

He took my hand and led the way out of my room and down the hallway to the dining room. With their razor-edged wings beating inside my abdomen as they swarmed up from the shallows, the steel butterflies gave me a panicky sensation as each blade sliced into my flesh.

Unknowingly, I squeezed Jacob's hand. He gave it back while casting a wary glance my way.

"Just concentrate; I've got you.I'm in your back. Breathe deeply. If you come near to him, hold your emotions."

And I don't think I could cry right now.

I was cold. I felt incredibly numb and deathly afraid.

Even though I was still depressed, I was also enraged. He had made me hate the moon, and I was furious with him. She had invaded my zone, and I was upset with her for it.

I'm upset with the moon for handing me this situation.

Forks were clinking on ceramic plates as we entered the dining hall discreetly amid the constant talk. He emitted a strong perfume that blocked out the other smells from my senses. His aroma tickled my nose and gave me a calm yet achingly wanting sensation that nearly brought me to my knees.

Fortunately, no one stopped chatting as recognizable individuals looked over at us after smelling us. I would be paralyzed with fear and fixate on the ground. Submissively

Many eyes focused on the way our hands were entwined. Jacob was being burned by a particular pair that was watching for any sign of my body. I stayed close to Jacob because I didn't want to feel his eyes on me all the time. I'm sure I would respond to it.

Jacob gave a low warning growl, which caused the lingering eyes to return to their work. We moved closer to his line of sight as we encroached deeper inside the dining hall. Although I didn't look past his shielding form, I could smell my mate twice as strongly.

The notion of his eyes on me made my skin shiver with excitement. He turned to look at me, but I concentrated, held my breath, and kept an eye on what Jacob was doing.

My throat tightened. We moved toward the breakfast buffet, which was set up on the kitchen island, tightening our hold on Jacob's hand.

Jacob released my hand, grabbed a plate while maintaining his attention solely on me. "What do you want? I was speechless and wanted to turn into a puddle and vanish as soon as he bent his head toward me and peered down at me with a critical gaze.

It was considered a symbolic act when a man of greater position would cook a supper for a woman.

Making my food had significance. People would converse out of generosity or affection. His brother would detest it as well.

I always thanks Jacob for comfort; I wasn't the one to play games. I exhaled quickly through my mouth and met his gaze while grinning slightly.

"Just the same old," I said.

From behind me, I could hear a deep rumbling. My partner disapproved of his younger brother taking care of me. Even though I no longer believe I should refer to him as "my mate," I am unable to say his name. It makes me shiver.

His eyes were once more fixed on me, moving up and down my body. Anxiety's skillful fingers tightened around my abdomen like an invisible tendril of his soul reaching out to grasp every glimpse of my skin that was available to him. I encircled myself with my arms in an effort to contain my internal bleeding. My body was aching for his touch. My head tipped in the direction of the wolf inside of me as she nudged me, urging me to approach her mate. I managed to go through and recover control, albeit it was challenging. As he prepared both my and his plates, Jacob was unaware of my predicament.

I straightened my back and ignored the heated sensation, controlling my emotions.

"Come with me." I walked with Jacob and sat down at the other end of the table after receiving an elbow from him. Thankfully, the other people seated at the table blocked my view of him, so I didn't have to feel his eyes on me while I sat there.

I appreciate it, Jacob. His blue eyes were just a little bit darker than his siblings' as we locked eyes as he grinned warmly at me from below. The two men might have made good underwear models. The perfection of their DNA was breath taking.

I know I wouldn't be in pain if only he had been my mate. I was able to get past how strange it felt to be his. It would have been simple with the connection. It lures you into doing things.

We dined in silence, occasionally making remarks about the food. Jacob always ate so quickly, taking in his entire meal as if someone were about to take it away.

Males...

I jerked away from a hand on my shoulder and glanced to my left to see who it was.

"Tallulah..."

"Bella, hello. All I wanted to say was... I really apologize for anything. And I'm always here for you if you need someone to talk. "Her words were nice, considerate, and charming. She spoke with sincerity, and most of all, there was no trace of sympathy in her eyes.

Tallulah was a calm she-wolf who was a year older than I was. She already knew who her mate was. He just happened to be the closest friend of my friend. Well, one of them.

"I'm fine, Tallulah. Thank you."My lips began to form a comforting grin, but it was artificial. People knew I never flashed my teeth when wearing a false smile.

She gave me that "bullshiiit" expression with a knowing grin. She was aware.

Even though I appeared to be in good shape, I was anything but nothing .

After breakfast, Jacob led me out of the dining room through the back door. Everyone was watching us, and one particular pair of eyes sent chills down my spine.

When I can hardly handle it, how is he able to? It has a very strong connection towards your mate. Mate relationship It had to be eating him alive, right? He is four years older than I am.

Jacob and I continued our hike through the woodland next to the Packhouse, rounding the hill to the clover-covered cliffs that overlooked our home territory. Once I was at a secure location where we had a meeting, he hugged me tightly. I breathed in his aroma and let it calm me.

We sat there for a while in quiet, staring out over the vast pack lands. Our secret location was high up on the cliffs where the stream descended the rocks into a stunning waterfall from the top. The packhouse was directly below us, across the lake from us. Up until the lake curved to the right into no man's land, miles of the lake were visible from this vantage point.

You could reach our secret location by continuing uphill through the woods to the right of the packhouse and crossing the wide stream.

As time passed, I observed the packhouse getting busier. Males who had finished breakfast began to gather outside as they prepared to warm up for training. No matter what rank they held, every male was taught to be a warrior. More training is associated with higher titles.

Jacob sighed and turned to face me while straightening his posture. I'll be done in two hours, but I have to go to the train. If you want, you can wait here, but you must not return to your room. He smiled softly and rose from the clovers beside me, "Shift, explore; we can run together later."

He gave me one last look before backing away and running through the clearing and down the mountainside, and I smiled tightly in return. Everything around me was muffled by the waterfall's roaring water below. I was alone with my thoughts at this point.

Here, in our hidden place, no one would bother me. No one came here unless they were planning on cliff diving into the vast, azure lake below. Long, long ago, it was a rock quarry. Some people have visited this location, but few have made the effort to travel all the way to the top of the cliffs. I was seated in a small, quaint opening between two stands of trees. Thank goodness nobody would discover me here.

I observed the stream's water as it descended from the high grassy mountain behind me, descended over the cliff, travelled over smooth stones, and then plunged down a 30-foot waterfall before splashing into the lake. It was a lovely and tranquil place. The clearing by the small stream was adorned with meadow flowers.

I searched about and found the pebble that contained my fragrance. My pillar. I stepped down from the ledge onto the soft stone by the stream, removed my sandals, and dipped my toes into the refreshingly cool spring water.

My feet were submerged in the peaceful moving water, and I was lying on my back with my head resting in the clovers. My internal kinks, which had been twisting for so long, were now releasing. I sighed as I experienced a sense of serenity that had been so unfamiliar to me. Not having to worry about anything here was different. It felt secure here, where I could let my thoughts go and just feel.

The only sound I could hear was the river trickling by my feet as I closed my eyes and let the sun glide over my eyelids in between the swaying trees.

I inhaled the aromas that were all around me: fresh pine, a few deer, meadow grass, clover, wildflowers, and the moist earth of the creek.

Peaceful.

My skin began to experience an urge and a persuading sensation that seemed like the sun was shining on me. Before landing on my face, where I felt a current gently buzz through my body, tiny goose bumps crowded up my legs, across my thighs, and slowly caressed the remainder of my body.

I understood what it meant.

I quickly opened my eyes and sat up, which made my head spin. I took a quick look around the little, confined clearing, but I didn't notice anything unusual.

Yet he was present.

By concentrating on the sensations I was experiencing, I discovered a pair of silver eyes staring back at me from the shadowy bushes behind me, where Jacob had previously vanished.

My gaze fixed on his. His wolf, which is dark gray and white, crept out of the woods, pawing at me as he whimpered, his tail down and the front of his body slipping onto the ground. He was requesting this brief moment from me as he awaited my consent. Only when they are acting badly or for their female can male wolves assume the surrender attitude.

This wolf I knew.

I turned slowly in his direction while keeping my feet under me and signalled for him to come closer by waving.

My heart was racing, and those steel butterflies sprang forth once again as I tightened my hands. It would be challenging to do this.

Despite how much it hurt my heart, I had to ask him. I had to understand.

"Why are you in this place?"My voice was trembling from fear.

I continued to hold my hand out as the wolf drew nearer. He slowly made his way back into the woods, hiding from my view as he whined and then broke bones with his teeth.

I had to close my eyes in order to concentrate on taming my wolf when he emerged from the woods, standing tall with just a pair of trousers hanging from his waist, so low that the v-line of his hips was apparent.

In the wilderness, we always kept our clothing a secret.

He was standing so close to me. His soul's pull toward mine was too strong for me to resist. I gently opened my eyes and kept staring at his figure.

So powerful.

His abs, which were exactly a six pack, stretched his tanned skin as his muscles glared at me with gritted teeth. Under his skin, steel pecks moved in response to movement.

His arms were incredibly strong, with muscle cords that moved when his fists clenched and his shoulders were broad. Unintentionally, I raised my gaze to his attractive face, seeing his prominent cheekbones, strong jaw, and sky-blue eyes that were staring back at me.

He exuded the power, alpha spirit. An Alpha warrior The Cresent Moon pack's incoming alpha.

I was unable to look away from him. We were by ourselves. Simply the two of us, frozen in time. Those blue eyes were clouded with yearning, mirroring my own sorrow.

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes as a tremor passed through him. I followed suit. My body was going into overdrive due to the buzzing sensation coming from my veins, yet his aroma helped my mind to unwind.

When he cautiously approached me, I sensed him in the distance, and I opened my eyes, widening them as my heart pounded in my chest.

I sat still, staring up at him as he towered over my trembling figure.

I could only characterize our eye contact as looking up into a clear sky.

I uttered his name, watching as he trembled as soon as I said it. His attraction to me was overpowering.

His voice, "Bella," had the same impact. To maintain my balance and keep the wolf at bay, my fingers pressed into the ground. When he spoke, his voice was like liquid joy.

"I believe we need to talk,"