Chapter 5

Amirah Holland POV:

His question hung in the air, sharp and accusatory, making my heart leap into my throat. Panic flared, hot and quick. He had seen something. Or suspected. My mind raced, trying to conjure a plausible lie, but my thoughts were a jumbled mess. I tightened my grip on the glass of tea, the warmth a strange contrast to the sudden chill that enveloped me.

"Just... school stuff," I mumbled, my voice barely a whisper, trying to keep my expression neutral. The lie tasted like ash in my mouth.

He took another step closer, his dark eyes intense, pinning me in place. He wasn't fooled. His gaze flickered to the pillow, then back to my face, a silent demand for the truth. He had always been able to read me, to see through my flimsy defenses, but I refused to let him control this last, fragile shred of my privacy. "It's nothing, Kendrick. Just a photo of one of the professors I might be working with." The partial truth was a small victory, a tiny act of rebellion.

He scrutinized me for a long moment, his gaze unwavering, as if searching for a hidden defect. The air grew thick with unspoken tension. I braced myself for his disapproval, his dismissal, his inevitable attempt to control.

Then, his voice, low and dangerous, finally broke the silence. "I don't want you making new 'friends,' Amirah. Especially not academic colleagues. Focus on your studies, on the work. Keep your distance from others." It wasn't a suggestion. It was a cold, unequivocal command, delivered with all the authority of a judge handing down a sentence.

I stared at him, a fresh wave of anger rising within me. My life. My choices. He had rejected my love, orchestrated my humiliation, and now he wanted to dictate my friendships? The audacity of it burned. He wanted me to be a solitary, emotionless automaton, solely focused on his expectations.

But I simply nodded, a tight, forced smile plastered on my face. "Of course, Kendrick. Understood." My voice was as flat as his. There was no point in arguing, no point in fighting. Not yet.

He seemed satisfied with my compliant response. He turned to leave, pausing at the door. "Make sure you drink that tea. And get some rest. You look tired." The words were almost solicitous, a strange echo of concern, but they rang hollow.

As soon as the door clicked shut, I set the glass of 'Chrissy's special brew' on the bedside table, untouched. Its cloying sweetness, still warm, seemed to mock me. I couldn't bring myself to drink it. The idea of him trying to control even my choice of beverage, through his fiancée no less, was infuriating.

The next morning, the penthouse was eerily quiet. I woke up with a dull ache behind my eyes, a lingering sense of exhaustion. I dressed quickly, determined to finalize my application for Boston, to escape this gilded cage.

Kendrick and Chrissy were nowhere to be found. A faint sense of relief washed over me. At least I wouldn't have to endure their saccharine domesticity over breakfast. I busied myself, gathering my paperwork for Professor Vance, a small but significant step towards my freedom.

Out of sheer, morbid curiosity, I pulled out my phone and checked Chrissy's social media. My fingers trembled slightly as I navigated to her profile. A fresh wave of images flooded the screen. Chrissy, radiant and laughing, on a sun-drenched beach. Kendrick beside her, his arm around her waist, a genuine, joyful smile on his face. The caption read: "Spontaneous romantic getaway! So glad my darling Kendrick swept me away for a few days before the wedding prep gets too intense! #EngagedLife #LoveMyKendrick."

My breath hitched. They were on a trip. While I was struggling to put my life back together, while I was dealing with the aftermath of his cruel charade, they were off on a romantic retreat. His tenderness, that rare, soft expression I'd glimpsed on his face, was on full display for Chrissy, for the world. It was a painful echo of the dreams I once had, of the romantic gestures I secretly longed for from him.

He had promised me a celebration once, a special trip for my graduation. A trip that never materialized. Now, he was spontaneously whisking Chrissy away, showering her with the very experiences I had once fantasized about. The realization hit me anew, a fresh wave of grief. I was nothing. She was everything.

I scrolled past the smiling faces, the idyllic scenery, a cold detachment settling over me. The images, once capable of tearing my heart to shreds, now barely registered. There was nothing left to break. My heart felt like a barren landscape, stripped bare of all emotion.

I made my way to school, my steps light, fueled by a renewed sense of purpose. Professor Vance met me with a warm smile. "Amirah, the MIT department head just confirmed your acceptance! You start next month." Her words were a balm, a lifeline, a promise of a future untainted by Kendrick's shadow.

"Thank you, Professor," I said, a genuine smile finally touching my lips. "Thank you so much." I had made it. I was finally free. I told her I would leave in two weeks, giving myself just enough time to tie up loose ends. I knew I needed to make a clean break, to leave New York with nothing holding me back. I told myself it was for a better education, a new challenge, a fresh start. But deep down, I knew it was an escape. An escape from him, from Chrissy, from the phantom pain of a love that never was.

On my way back to the penthouse, the sky opened up. Rain lashed down, cold and relentless, mirroring the storm inside me. I pulled my thin jacket tighter, huddling against the sudden chill. I remembered a similar downpour years ago, when I was sixteen. I'd been caught in a sudden storm, ill-prepared, and Kendrick had rushed to my rescue, his large umbrella shielding me, his warm hand on my back. He had laughed, his eyes crinkling at the corners, and I had felt safe, cherished, loved.

Now, I was alone. The memory, once comforting, now felt like a cruel taunt. The rain soaked through my clothes, chilling me to the bone. My head spun, a dull ache intensifying behind my eyes. My legs felt weak, my body trembling with more than just the cold.

Suddenly, the world tilted. My vision blurred, and the ground rushed up to meet me. I tried to catch myself, but my legs gave out completely. I collapsed onto the wet pavement, the cold seeping into my bones. A wave of nausea washed over me, and everything went black.

I woke up to the antiseptic smell of a hospital room. The fluorescent lights hummed, harsh and unyielding. A nurse, a kind-faced woman with tired eyes, was checking my IV drip. "You're awake," she said softly. "You passed out in the rain. Severe dehydration, exhaustion, and a nasty fever. You've been out for a day."

A day. Kendrick and Chrissy were on their romantic getaway, completely oblivious. I was alone, again. The nurse gave me a sympathetic look. "We need to contact your family. Who should we call?"

My fingers fumbled for my phone, my mind instinctively going to the one person who was supposed to be there. Kendrick. He was my guardian. My family. Even after everything, the habit was deeply ingrained. I knew he was busy, always busy, but surely he would want to know. He always answered my calls, even the ones meant to provoke him. The desperate attempts to reach him, the foolish hope that he would care, were a familiar, painful dance.

I dialed his number, my heart pounding a frantic rhythm against my ribs. A moment of silence, then a robotic voice: "The number you have dialed is currently unavailable." My blood ran cold. His phone was off. He was unreachable.

I tried again, and again, a desperate mantra of redialing, each failed attempt a fresh stab of pain. Had he blocked me? Or was he truly so engrossed in Chrissy that he turned off his phone? The thought was a crushing blow. I needed him. Just once. Just to know someone cared.

The nurse returned, her expression gentle but firm. "Honey, have you reached anyone? We need a family contact for your release."

I shook my head, a bitter, humorless laugh escaping my lips. "He's... busy," I managed, the lie tasting like ash. "He's a lawyer. Very important. And," I added, the words catching in my throat, "he's on a trip with his fiancée." The words stung, a harsh reminder of my isolation.

I remembered the countless times he' d dropped everything for a client, for a court case, for a business deal. But for me? I was just a problem to be delegated, an inconvenience to be managed. The memory of his past concern, the way he'd rushed to my side when I was younger, felt like a distant dream. I was alone, truly alone. And for the first time, I knew with chilling certainty that he wouldn't come. I finally understood that I was not his concern. Not anymore. I wouldn't burden him again.