Chapter 2

Amirah Holland POV:

The air in the vestibule tasted like ash. My ears were ringing, and the world tilted precariously. I stared at Kendrick, searching for any sign of him, any hint that this was a cruel joke, but his face remained impassive, his gaze fixed on Chrissy. My heart, which I thought had already died a thousand deaths, found a new way to break.

Chrissy led the way into the living room, her movements fluid and confident, as if she owned the space. She offered me a seat on the plush cream sofa, a new addition that replaced the worn leather one I used to love. "Are you hungry, sweetie?" she asked, her voice oozing saccharine concern. "I just made some amazing mushroom risotto. Kendrick just adores it."

My stomach clenched, a cold knot of nausea forming deep within. The rich, earthy smell of the risotto, usually comforting, now seemed to mock me. It was a domestic scene, warm and inviting, but I felt like an alien observer, separated by a pane of impenetrable glass. The food felt like poison, a bitter reminder of a life I' d coveted and never had.

Kendrick sat beside Chrissy, his hand resting casually on her knee. He laughed at something she whispered, a low, rumbling sound that used to send shivers down my spine, but now only echoed with hollow pain. Their heads were close, their bodies aligned, a perfect, intimate picture of a couple deeply in love. It was a scene ripped from my most agonizing dreams, now playing out in vivid, crushing reality.

I couldn' t bear to watch. My gaze dropped, fixing on the intricate pattern of the rug, anything to avoid the sight of their effortless affection. Each shared glance, each gentle touch, was a fresh wound, twisting the knife deeper into my chest.

"I... I think I'll just head up to my room," I mumbled, pushing myself up from the sofa. The words felt foreign, forced. I needed to escape, to find a place where their happiness couldn' t reach me.

Chrissy's smile didn't waver. "Oh, of course, darling. You must be exhausted. Oh, by the way, I hope you don't mind, but I moved some of those scraggly old bushes from the garden. They were just blocking the light, you know? And Kendrick agreed, they needed to go."

My head snapped up. The scraggly old bushes. My bushes. The ones I'd planted with my father, the day after my mother left, a small act of defiance against the emptiness. Each year, they bloomed with tiny, defiant white flowers, a fragile reminder of a fading memory. "The... the honeysuckle?" I asked, my voice barely a whisper.

Kendrick finally looked at me, his expression unreadable. "Chrissy wanted more space for her herb garden. It's more practical." Practical. That was Kendrick. Everything boiled down to logic, utility. My heart, my memories, were never practical.

"Right," I managed, the single word tasting like dust in my mouth. My voice was devoid of emotion, a blank slate to match his. The casual dismissal of something so precious to me felt like a final insult. Those bushes were a tangible link to my past, a silent confidante through years of loneliness. Now, they were gone, replaced by Chrissy's practical herbs.

I turned and walked away, each step heavy, dragging me further into the abyss of my despair. I just needed my room, my sanctuary, the one place where I could lick my wounds in peace. I reached the familiar door, my hand trembling slightly as I pushed it open.

But it wasn't my room. The walls, once painted a soft blue, were now a vibrant, aggressive crimson. My old desk, piled high with books and sketches, was gone, replaced by a gleaming easel and a half-finished canvas. The room buzzed with a strange, artistic energy, alien and unwelcoming. My stomach dropped.

Kendrick appeared behind me, his voice calm, clipped. "Chrissy needed a studio space. Your old room had the best light." He gestured vaguely to the large window. "We moved your things to the guest room on the third floor. It's more... private." More private. More distant. More out of the way.

I nodded slowly, unable to speak, unable to protest. The words lodged somewhere in my throat, choking me. My room, my last refuge, had been systematically dismantled, erased, repurposed for someone else. For her.

My eyes drifted to the canvas on the easel. It was a portrait, vibrantly painted. Kendrick. His stern profile, but softened, a hint of a smile playing on his lips, an intimacy I' d never witnessed. Below the portrait, in confident brushstrokes, was a date. Six months ago.

Six months ago. Long before I' d finally given up on provoking him, long before I was picked up at the police station. Long before he brought me 'home.' He had been seeing her, loving her, painting her. All while I was out there, desperate for a crumb of his attention, smashing credit cards and getting into trouble, foolishly believing my chaos might shake him from his indifference.

The realization hit me like a tidal wave, drowning me in a sea of betrayal and crushing despair. He had moved on. He had never been with me, not truly. I was a child to be managed, a ward to be housed, but never loved. Never chosen. My head throbbed, a relentless drumbeat of agony. My knees weakened, and I gripped the doorframe to keep from collapsing.

Later that night, curled in the alien guest room, the crimson walls of my old space mocking me, I scrolled through Chrissy's public social media. It was an endless reel of their blossoming romance. Pictures of them at art galleries, his arm around her. Her laughing, radiant, clinging to his side. The timeline was damning. Date after date, revealing a relationship that had bloomed rapidly, publicly, passionately.

Then I saw it. A video. Kendrick, on one knee, against a backdrop of twinkling city lights, a velvet box open in his hand. Chrissy's joyous scream. His face, usually a mask of stoic control, was alight with genuine affection, a tenderness that made my stomach churn. "Will you marry me, Chrissy Castro?" he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. The same voice that had dismissed my love as 'unhealthy' and 'childish.' The same voice that had never once spoken those words to me, not even in casual affection.

He genuinely loved her. This wasn't some arrangement, some fake show for me. This was real love, the kind I had always craved from him. And he was giving it to someone else, so easily, so freely. All the warmth, all the affection, all the deep, abiding connection I had yearned for, he offered to her without a second thought. For me, it was cold duty; for her, it was boundless devotion. The realization was a final, devastating blow. My heart wasn' t just broken; it was pulverized.

I watched the video until my phone died in my hands, the screen going black, leaving me in the suffocating darkness. Sleep didn' t come, couldn't come. My mind replayed every tender moment, every loving glance, every joy-filled laugh from the videos. The image of Kendrick, on one knee, his eyes full of adoration, burned behind my eyelids.

Just before dawn, a muffled sound drifted from downstairs. A soft moan, then a low, masculine murmur. The penthouse was designed for soundproofing, but in the oppressive quiet of the night, with my senses hyper-alert, the intimate sounds carried. My body stiffened, a cold dread creeping up my spine. My heart pounded, a frantic drum against my ribs. It was them. Kendrick and Chrissy. The sounds were undeniable, unmistakable.

A wave of humiliation, searing and raw, washed over me. I clamped my hands over my mouth, stifling a sob. My cheeks burned, my entire body rigid with shock and self-loathing. I wanted to disappear, to vanish into thin air, to escape the crushing reality that was unfolding just floors below me.

Tears streamed down my face, silent and scalding. I crawled under the covers, pulling the duvet over my head, as if that flimsy barrier could block out the truth. The sounds continued, a cruel symphony of their happiness, their intimacy, their undeniable bond. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't think. All I knew was an overwhelming, desperate need to be anywhere but here. I had to leave. For good.

The next morning, I crept downstairs, my eyes gritty from a sleepless night, my soul heavy with a resolve I hadn't known I possessed. Kendrick was at the breakfast bar, not alone. Chrissy was with him, perched on a stool, her fiery red hair a vibrant splash against his dark suit. He was gently brushing her hair, his fingers tender, his gaze soft. He was doing for her what he had never done for me.

My throat felt raw. I cleared it, forcing a neutral expression onto my face. "I'm heading to school," I announced, my voice flat, emotionless.

Kendrick merely nodded, his eyes still on Chrissy. He didn't say goodbye, didn't ask when I'd be back. He didn't even truly register my presence. My words hung in the air, unheard, unacknowledged.

A profound sense of emptiness settled over me. There was no place for me here. Not anymore. I was an intruder, a ghost haunting a home that was no longer mine. This wasn't just a physical absence; it was an emotional one. I was erased.

I walked out the door and didn't look back. I went straight to the university office. I needed a new path, a new future, one that didn't involve Kendrick Page or the crushing weight of his indifference. I needed a way out.

I found Professor Eleanor Vance, my academic advisor, in her office, surrounded by stacks of research papers. "Professor Vance," I began, my voice steady despite the turmoil inside, "I'd like to ask about the early graduate program opportunities. The one in Boston."

She looked up, her glasses perched on her nose. "Amirah? The MIT program? I offered you that last semester, and you turned it down. Said you had 'other commitments.'" Her eyebrows rose, a hint of surprise in her tone.

I lowered my gaze, a flicker of shame rising. "I know, Professor. I... I made a mistake. But now I'm ready. I'm truly ready. I want to apply. I need this." My voice cracked on the last word, betraying the desperate plea within. I met her gaze, silently begging for a chance to escape my suffocating reality.