Chapter 4 Not A Dream

I woke up to dust particles dancing in a ray of sun that hurt my eyes.

My head pounded like someone was shoving a hammer behind my forehead,beating a rhythm I didn't understand. My mouth was dry. My eyes were dry.My heels were in the doorway. And my red dress that had made me feel powerful for exactly fifteen minutes was bunched awkwardly around my hips like a discarded napkin.

I blinked at the ceiling.Mind spiraling.

Was it a dream?

No. Had to be. There was no way three insanely hot, terrifying men had whispered filthy things in my ear and asked if they could share me like I was dessert.

No way I'd felt my entire body quietly hum at the idea.

I groaned and sat up slowly, rubbing at my temples. My throat felt dry and croaked like I'd smoked a pack of cigarettes and cried for hours. Which was possible.

Then I saw it.

A small black card on my nightstand.

Crisp.

Perfect.

Untouched by the chaos of my life.

I stared at it for a full ten seconds before I picked it up.

It was thick, like premium paper. Embossed gold letters spelled out a name I didn't recognize until I read the second line.

Asher Vale

Chief Executive Officer

Vanguard Capital | Private Affairs Division

My heart skipped.

It really hadn't been a dream.

I closed my eyes, trying to piece together the blur after that conversation. I remembered Levi saying something about being "gentle unless she wants it rough." I remembered Kai tracing circles on my lower back saying i wouldn't have to worry a day in my life. And Asher...

He'd given me the card with a quiet, deliberate and calm look.

"You don't have to decide tonight,I understand this must be confusing "he'd said, voice warm like whiskey. "I'll get you home. You can think about it. And when you're ready... call me."

And I had let him drop me off. In a black SUV. With heated seats ,tinted windows and zero small talk. Just the quiet weight of temptation lingering in the air.

I hadn't said yes to him- or to them.

But I hadn't said no, either.

I dropped the card like it burned my skin .The reality too shocking to understand.

"Get it together, Ivy.

Thankfully, i was off my second job today and i most likely might quit my third.

I really needed a break

Shoving the dress off, I stumbled into the bathroom and turned the shower on full blast. The water was barely warm, but I didn't care. I stood there, letting it wash away the sins I hadn't even committed yet and the worries i could bear to carry.

I washed my hair. My body. My shame.

Then I cleaned.

Vacuumed the rug. Shook out the blankets. Opened the windows and let air back into the suffocating space I'd abandoned for love that hadn't even lasted.

Around noon, I finally picked up my phone and did what I'd been avoiding since everything started to fall apart.

I called my Nana.

She answered on the third ring, voice tired but loving. "Baby?"

I sank into the corner of the couch, curling up like I was five again. "Hi, Nana."

A pause. "You sound sad."

"I'm okay," I lied. Then I broke. "No, I'm not."

"Oh, Ivy..."

Her voice was always soft but never weak. It had been my anchor since I was old enough to understand what loss felt like. When Mom left. When Dad went to prison. When the foster families failed.

Nana had always stayed.

We talked for ten minutes.About everything.

I asked how she was- the current state of her health and how long her remaining insulin would last, how Ella was doing, and promised I'd come by soon. But the guilt ate at me when she said Ella had been eating cereal for dinner because the food stamps hadn't gone through.

"She misses you," Nana said gently. "She asks about you every night."

I wiped my cheeks. I didn't even remember starting to cry. "I'm going to fix everything. I promise Nana I will."

"I know you will, baby."

After the call, I dried my face, got dressed in jeans and a hoodie, and marched out to the nearest discount grocery store like I had just gotten a mission from God.

I bought rice, eggs, bread, peanut butter, canned soup, and enough fruit to make Ella believe the world wasn't so hard. I also stopped by the pharmacy to get some more insulin vials-Lord were they expensive. I spent almost everything I had, but I didn't care. Nana and Ella came first. Always.

By the time I got home and unloaded the bags, exhaustion hit me like a wall. I needed a minute. Just a second to pretend I wasn't drowning in debt, loneliness, and temptation.

I curled up on the couch, pulled a blanket over my knees, and scrolled through Netflix.

Thankfully, Jamal hasn't logged me out his Netflix yet.

A movie. That's all I needed.

Just one movie to forget everything-

BZZZ. BZZZ. BZZZ.BZZZ.BZZZ.

I groaned, reaching blindly for the phone.

"Goddammit, Jamal, stop-"

But it wasn't his name on the screen this time.

Unknown Number.

" Now who could this be?"

My thumb hovered.

And then I picked up.

Silence.

And then, that voice.that soothing voice.

"Hey, princess."