Chapter 2 Torn Between Love and Duty

Chapter 2: Torn Between Love and Duty

Xenois

I watched as Riley finally fell asleep with the light from his nightlight casting shadows across his sleeping face.

His nightmare had finally subsided, his breathing was even now.

Sophia sat on the edge of the bed with me, her hand gently stroking his hair showing maternal comfort.

"Thank you for coming," she said, looking up at me with those large brown eyes of hers that had once captivated me a long time ago.

"He wouldn't calm down until you got here."

I shifted uncomfortably, knowing fully well that I'd bailed on dinner with Luna and Ollie. Again.

"It's fine. Is he getting these nightmares often?"

"More and more. He says there's a shadow man who visits him." She stood up from the bed as she smoothened down her dress.

"The doctor says it's just childhood fears, but..."

"But you don't believe that," I said finishing the sentence for her.

She shook her head, as she led me from Riley's room into her kitchen.

The apartment I'd set them up in was modest by my standards but comfortable.

I'd wanted to do more, but Luna had already been furious about me helping them at all that I had to compromise on this with her.

I felt guilty as Sophia poured two glasses of wine.

I knew very well that I shouldn't stay, but I found myself taking the offered glass anyway.

"Riley asked about his father again today," she said softly.

I stiffened hearing that from her. We'd been over this. "Sophia..."

"I know, I know. I told him his father is someone special who can't be with us right now."

She sipped her wine, before placing her finger on the rim as she continued from where she stopped.

"But he sees how you are with him. Children aren't stupid."

"I'm not his father," I said firmly, although the words felt empty to me.

I'd been more present for Riley than for my own son these past months. Realizing this made me feel uncomfortable.

My phone vibrated. I took an excuse from Sophia and brought out my phone . It was a text from Luna about Ollie's birthday. I'd forgotten it was coming up.

I felt more guilty at this but I shoved it aside and typed a quick promise to be there.

"Everything okay?" Sophia asked, moving closer, towards me.

"Fine. Just work." I lied without batting an eye.

"You work too hard. Mayor, CEO, Alpha... when do you get time for yourself?" She touched me gently and I didn't pull away like I should have.

The simple truth was, being here with Sophia and Riley was the only way I could escape from everything.

It was my escape from the pressures that comes along with leadership, from the coldness of my marriage, and also the expectations everyone had of the great Xenois Blackwood.

Here, I was just Xenois, the man who had once loved Sophia before duty called me away.

But I had a son at home. A true mate. Responsibilities as well.

"I should go," I said, setting down the wine that I had barely drank from.

Sophia's expression fell slightly before she hid it.

"Of course. Riley will be disappointed he didn't get to see you properly. Will you come to his birthday next week?"

I froze in my tracks as I tensed up. "His birthday?"

"Next Saturday. He's turning six." Her eyes held mine as she continued speaking. "He asked specifically if you would come. I told him I'd ask."

Next Saturday. The same day as Ollie's birthday. The same day I'd just promised Luna I'd be there for our son.

"I... I'll try to make it for part of the day," I said, even as I knew it was a promise I couldn't keep. Not fully.

As I drove home through the sleeping city, I tried to justify my choices. Sophia and Riley needed me.

Riley had no father figure. Ollie had Luna. But the excuses sounded hollow in my own mind.

The bond between Luna and me was filled with her sadness, her loneliness.

I'd been blocking it for months, focusing instead on the strange pull I felt toward Riley.

It wasn't natural, this obsession with another woman's child. Sometimes I wondered if there was something wrong with me.

I parked in our driveway, staring at the dark windows of our Luna would be asleep , or pretending to be asleep.

Riley too. My family was, waiting for a husband and father who was rarely there.

Tomorrow, I promised myself.

Tomorrow I'll spend time with Ollie. Ask about his illness, which Luna kept mentioning but I'd never fully paid attention to.

Tomorrow I'd be better.