Chapter 3 The Rejection

Lila's POV

'Lila...you're pregnant"

The words were like a kick to the stomach. I blinked as I tried to take in the pack doctor's words. Are you sure? How? I mean, how am I pregnant? Trying to make sense of the news that seemed to echo throughout the little hospital room, my thoughts raced.

I glanced around the room, still having trouble seeing well. As I tried to focus, the white walls seemed to spin a little. Beside me stood the pack doctor, an old woman with a serious look, silver-streaked hair drawn back in a tight bun, and sympathetic eyes. With a clipboard in her damaged hands, she watched me closely, judging my reaction. Kian was also present, his face stoic, his arms crossed tightly across his chest. As far away from my bed as he could be while still being there, he stood in the room's corner.

"Pregnant?" I said it again, just above a whisper. The term sounded scary and strange when I spoke it.

With a careful lowering of her eyes, the doctor nodded. "Yes. I think she's about four weeks along. The sickness, lightheadedness, and tiredness you've been feeling are all normal early pregnancy signs.

My stomach twisted. Four weeks. That suggested that it took place that evening. The evening we shared. His touch, his kiss, the feel of his body on mine, the memories came rushing back. I had assumed that meant something, that perhaps he was attracted to me. I wasn't sure what to think at this point.

Kian wasn't looking at me when I looked at him. His eyes were locked on the wall as though it held some fascinating feature that only he could see, and his jaw was clenched so hard that I could see the muscle moving beneath his skin. Every line of his body radiated strain, and his stance was tight.

"Kian..." My voice shook a little as I began. I wanted him to say something, anything at all.

Before I could say anything more, he interrupted. He replied, "This is impossible," in a voice as hard and cold as ice.

His tone made me wince, and I pulled the thin hospital blanket tighter about me as though it might protect me from what he was saying. "What do you mean?"

At last, he turned to face me, his blue eyes cold and aloof. Any warmth that had been during our shared night had disappeared entirely, and in its place came a coolness that made me feel absolutely cold. "I mean, this isn't possible. I can't bear a child. I am... I don't have the ability.

The final, heavy word hung in the air. My heart was beating so loudly that I was certain everyone in the room could hear it as I stared at him. "But... but we..." I tripped because I couldn't think clearly.

He said, "It doesn't matter what happened," and pushed clear of the wall. At his sides, his hands clenched into fists. "I am impotent. It was proven by the test. Years ago, it was confirmed by three different doctors.

My vision became even more blurry as tears began to fill up in my eyes. The walls of the room felt like they were pushing in on me. "I'm telling the truth, Kian. I wouldn't. That is not what I would do. As I spoke, the words caught in my throat and my voice cracked.

His look toughened into something strange and nasty as he shook his head. There was no sign of the man who had hugged me so carefully. You're trying to trap me. You are trying to force yourself on me and make me take the responsibility for something that is not my fault."

No knife could cut as deeply as his words did. I had the sense that the room's air had been pulled out, and I was unable to breathe. A terrible tightness in my chest caused me to gulp for air. "Please, Kian... I am being honest. This is your kid. Instinctively, I stretched my hand to touch him, but he stepped away, avoiding contact.

His shoulders were stiff, and a muscle in his back was clearly moving under his thin t-shirt as he turned away. "I'd rather not hear it. You must go."

"What?" With my voice breaking, I whispered. I could only manage the basic words.

"You heard me," he stated in a serious and determined tone. As if I weren't worth the effort, he didn't even look at me while he talked. "Go. You are no longer welcome here. Gather your things and leave.

I had the sense that the earth was giving way under me. My mind was spinning with hurt and confusion, and my heart was broken. What was he doing? How could he simply... dismiss me in this manner? following all that had happened between us? How could he be so nasty, even if he didn't believe me?

Awkwardly, the doctor cleared her throat. She said, "Perhaps we should all take some time to process this news," in a softly strong voice. "Lila, stress is bad for the unborn child. You ought to get some rest.

But I was unable to sleep. Not with Kian's latest words. With shaky but steady legs, I forced myself out of bed. The room rocked a little, but I leaned against the wall for support.

I replied, "Fine," in a louder voice than I had expected. "I'll leave. You won't need to see me once more.

Kian stayed silent. He did not even notice my words. His words were less painful than his quiet.

Tears rolled down my face as I stumbled out of the hospital. The infirmary's gloom was suddenly replaced by the bright sunlight outside. As I went by, pack members paused to look, their curious gazes following me. I didn't give a damn. Kian's refusal was all I could think about.

I couldn't stay there, but I had no idea where I was going. Not after his earlier remark. Automatically, my feet led me across the courtyard, past the community dining hall where I had been eating my meals by myself for the previous weeks, and past the training grounds where fighters trained.

I returned to my cabin and sobbed as I lay on the bed. Naturally, my hands went to my stomach, where a small life was forming. Kian didn't seek that life. A life he wouldn't accept as his own. I hardly noticed the rough wool blanket beneath me scratching my skin.

Anger, sadness, and fear were among the feelings I experienced. How could I bring up a child by myself? How could I shield them from the werewolf world's perils? I had no experience as a mother. I had very few memories to lead me because my own had passed away when I was still a kid.

Above all else, though, I felt rejected. Kian had ignored me and didn't trust me. He believed I was trying to trick him by lying. It was too much to handle, the memory of his cold eyes, the disgust in his words. He didn't want the child I was having, and he rejected the child's presence completely.