Chapter 5 New Beginnings and Old Wounds

Abigail's Point of view.

He wouldn't look at me. It had been three days and he still wouldn't look at me. I had only thought that after the private moment, we had in the bathroom, that we could at least talk now without making things weird. But, boy was I wrong.

"Well, you should at least put a smile on your face," Arty said from behind, making me jump. I rolled my eyes at her, but was careful to maintain my smile. The last thing I wanted was to have her worried, but from the look on her face, there was no doubt she was way ahead of me.

"Are you okay? You're still not feeling faint, are you?" She asked a little bit too loud, bringing a couple of eyes on us. My grip tightened on the cold cup of coffee I'd been sipping on for a while now.

"I am fine. I'm okay, please don't worry about me." She still stared at me. Eyes squinted.

"You're sure?"

"Yes, I am. I ate well last night, no more cups of coffee and iced tea. I had real food." Where was he?

"Okay, well, what do you mean by real food?" She queried.

"A whole box of pizza?"

"How many slices did you eat?"

"Okay, these questions are getting crazier by the minute." I chuckled. She didn't join in. Okay, the girl was serious.

"I wanna know, for friend's sake." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"I ate a slice and a half, but the thing is still sitting in my refrigerator. It's waiting for me to get home and have a microwaving party with it." I rolled my shoulders playfully, bringing a small smile to Arty's lips. But I could feel another eye on me. It wouldn't let up, no matter what. I stared back at the person who stood not too far from us and a slow smile climbed onto his lips. He bit his lip and freakishly smoothed his mustache. Wait, what? He already had my attention, the extra stuff wasn't necessary. I nodded in greeting to him and he did the same to me too. After a few more seconds and it became more obvious by the second that he was not letting up, I turned away and back to Arty. She stared at him and smiled widely. I almost slapped my head in embarrassment. Couldn't she at least not give such a clear hint that she knew what was going on? I guess not, since the smile still stuck.

"You're terrible at this, you know?" I immediately had her attention. She was taken aback.

"At what?"

"Pretending."

She scoffed and smoothened her barely rumpled top. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh, yes you do. You're even terrible at lying. I can read you like a book, you know and we've already known each other for just two days."

She sighed. "Yeah well, lying is not really my strength."

"It shouldn't be. And just because many people do it every day doesn't mean it is good, you know." I said.

"Okay, what are you not saying?"

"What do you mean?"

"You have something on your mind, spit it out." She said and I groaned and diverted my gaze, only to have them back on mister lookington over there. I immediately averted them.

"Nothing."

"Come on, tell me. It's going to be a long day today and they say if you want to have a great day, share your problems with your neighbor every single morning."

"What?" That was the most crazy thing I'd ever heard.

Her lids dropped further into an uninterested look. "Okay, you got me. I kind of made that up, but still. It's good to share your problems, it only makes you more lighter."

At that moment, I didn't know if I should tell her. I adored Arty and her dorkiness but at the same time, I didn't want to tell anyone about my past. I didn't want anyone to look at me differently and most importantly, I didn't want anyone to look at Jack differently. I didn't want news about us flying around and not to say that Arty was a gossip, but a girl's gotta be safe, right?

"Are you going to tell me what the problem is? Or are you gonna make me stand here all day and stare at you?"

I shook my head, then blurted. "Jack and I used to be something." The gravity of the words that left my heart felt good. It felt freeing, but only for a while. Arty looked like she'd just witnessed snowfall during summer.

She started laughing, when I nudged her. "You're joking right?"

"I'm serious. We used to be unbreakable. Quite a pair." That was when she must have realized I was dead serious.

"Oh, no. What happened? Why do I feel like a sad story is about to come on?"

I tried to brighten up. I knew how painful it always was to talk about the past and everything it held. "If there was no good story first then the bad story wouldn't have happened. And without the bad story, we would still be together."

She ran her hands up and down my arm in sympathy. Why was she doing that? "Why didn't you tell me yesterday? You said nothing was going on between the both of you but I just sorta knew after that brief moment the both of you had at the ward. You called him Jack and he looked like a man who has run ten miles to and fro, and then was offered a cup of water." She said and I chuckled. I wanted badly to lighten the mood. It was way too moody around here. I was trying not to show weakness, while Arty still acted like I would break any moment from now.

"That is a very vivid imagination."

"Just saying what I sensed. And I'm good at these things." Silence. "Are you going to tell me what happened between the both of you? I mean, you don't have to. But if you want to, I'd like to know. If it's not ok-"

I immediately shook my head. "There's really nothing to tell. It ended a long time ago."

"How long?"

"Eleven years. It's been a while."

"Well, you don't look like it ended for you. You still love him, right?"

I didn't love him! I almost raised my voice at the absurdity of it all. Did I still love him? I shook my head, as though that would somehow suspend the thoughts. "I... I don't love him."

Arty slowly nodded, her gaze unwavering. "I'm not going to judge you if you still feel something for him. This childhood sweetheart stuff kinda leaves its print deep into us."

"I don't love him, Arty. I just... Sometimes the memories just don't leave, you know."

"It's what I have been tel-"

"Alright, listen up! Right now. I need your ears here, folks." A loud voice called From behind. It wasn't Cynthia. I think I'd seen her only once today. At the coffee machine. She sounded way more serious than she did at the coffee machine when she asked how well I was feeling this morning.

Arty and I turned fully, and so did the other interns. Was I curious? Yes! Was I scared? Absolutely! My stomach churned so loudly, stealing me a glance from Arty.

"I thought you said you had breakfast?" She whispered, lips barely moving.

"I did. Wait, coffee doesn't serve as breakfast?" I asked and the stare I got in return made my stomach churn even more.

"Abigail-"

"Abigail Espérer?" The doctor called out, startling me. It took a while for my brain to fall into the same steps and even when it did, I raised my arms up above my head too short. It was Arty who rose it up fully.

The doctor let out a small nod in my direction. Thank goodness she remembered me. I needed someone a little bit higher than me in rank that I could feel free to talk to that was not Jack. It could not be Jack. If he wanted space, I was going to give it to him. I was going to try to give it to him. Sure, we were in one hospital but I could do civil. For sure.

"You're going to be paired with Melvin Pen-" I turned, hoping my eyes would catch a glimpse of my partners. Wondering why my name came first. Did he have something to do with it? My eyes met the jet-black-haired guy that had been staring at me a few minutes ago. He seemed excited to be on my team. I gave the doctor my attention back, "You two are going to be under the supervision of doctor Cynthia." Wait, what?! Why? I had been running from Jack and they placed me under the supervision of his friend? That was just as unexpected as it was unfair.

"I hate this." I mouthed to Arty, after the doctor had concluded. Arty was lucky, she got to train for the first six months under the doctor herself. Why didn't I get the doctor? Did Jack have anything to do with this? I wouldn't be surprised if he had. But I knew enough to know that he too was running away from me.

"Ah, come on. It shouldn't be that bad. Has she given you any idea to make you think that she is not really as kind as her big smile entails?" Jacob slung his arms around my neck. He too was lucky. I didn't know why he was all skittish. The fact that internship had officially begun and we were welcomed into the theatre. Or maybe, just maybe he was ecstatic about the idea of being on the same team with Arty. Classic Jacob.

"Hey." Someone called from behind, I turned around and it was the smiling guy. What was his name again? Melvin? Yes, Melvin.

I gestured for Arty and Jacob to keep moving forward while Melvin fell into steps with me. It would give them both a little bit more time to talk. I knew without a doubt that I was a little bit of an obstacle. Even if Arty would not say it, I knew for sure that she felt something for Jacob.

"I'm Melvin." He said and before I could say anything, he chuckled and shook his head. "I know you already know that, I just... That is what introductions are usually headed with, right?" I smiled and nodded.

"Yeah. And I'm sure that you already know this too but I'm Abigail. Abigail Espérer."

He smiled. "Nice to meet you, Abigail. I didn't know you and I was going to be on the same team when I... When we..."

"You mean when you almost knocked my coffee down with your gawking?" I joked and he laughed out loud. He had a beautiful laughter. Very beautiful laughter.

"I am sorry if that made you uncomfortable, I wanted to come say hello but you were talking with your friend, so I knew I had to wait."

"Oh, you were already putting in some words, trust me," I said, pulling his legs again. And again, he chuckled.

"I didn't tag you as a funny one." He said and I shrugged.

"I guess I can say a few smart words when I wanna."

"I love it." Wasn't that a little bit forward? He must have been thinking the same thing because he pursed his lips.

"Hey, I love compliments," I said and he nodded slowly. He was cute. And so were his jet-black hair and his reading spectacles. Maybe he was all the partner I just needed to get through this. We made our way to the ER, and I smiled at how kind today was being. As I turned to the nearest waste bin, I saw him. Jack was staring- no, glaring- at us. Oh, boy. Just the last thing I needed.