Chapter 2 Chapitre 2

The small apartment was empty, like a space that you try to fill but refuse to fill, a place where the air is too big for it to feel like home anymore. Lara had left everything behind – or at least, she had thought so. Because here, in this place that she didn't know yet, everything seemed foreign to her. There was the kitchen with its small fridge, the bathroom with a shower that was too small, and a living room empty except for an old wooden shelf, on which she had placed a few books that she had picked up at random. But nothing was in its place yet.

Everything was still to be defined, still hanging. A piece of her old life here, another there, without really fitting together.

She sat on the couch, her legs folded against her, her back against the wall. The silence of the apartment overwhelmed her, heavy, oppressive, like a leaden weight. And at the same time, there was this strange feeling of freedom. A freedom she had not chosen, but which she nevertheless carried within her like a promise, an uncertain but potential future. She had managed to leave. She had crossed the threshold of their house without looking back. She had not looked back. She told herself that this was victory. But then why this emptiness in her heart, this bitter taste of iron on her lips? Why this feeling of being lost, abandoned to herself, in this new space that she had wanted?

The light barely filtered through the gray curtains of the living room. Lara had turned off her phone a while ago, but she knew that the next day, Ethan's messages would arrive. They would come, like an avalanche. Apologies, promises, "I love yous" that would no longer serve any purpose. Because it was not love he was offering her, but a fallen, tired, worn-out love. She knew she had no right to doubt, that she had to keep moving forward. But the pain was there, omnipresent, gnawing. Ethan. Him. The person she had loved with all her heart, whom she had thought she knew better than anyone else, and who, at that precise moment, seemed so far away.

She tried to close her eyes, to let sleep take her, but it never came. Her thoughts raced through her head, bickering, crashing like raging waves. She missed him. It was impossible. She had only just left, but she couldn't escape the void he had left. His arms, his scent, his voice, the sound of his footsteps in the house. Everything. She missed him and she hated to admit it. She had wanted this freedom, but at what cost? At what cost had she broken what they were, what they had been? She had no answers. She had no bearings. There was only this deafening silence, and the guilt that twisted her insides.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of her phone. Lara stood up abruptly, hurried to look at the screen. It was Claire. Lara hesitated for a moment before answering. Claire, her best friend, the one who had always supported her, who had seen her through the worst trials. Lara needed to talk to someone. She felt a little guilty for not having given news sooner. Claire would probably be pestering her with questions. But she wasn't ready to face her, not yet.

She picked up.

- Hi, Claire.

- Lara! Are you okay? Where are you? What are you doing? Do you want me to come see you?

- I'm... in my apartment. Well, it's kind of empty in here. I don't even know where to start...

- I understand... And you, how are you? It's difficult, isn't it?

- Yes... but it's also strange. I have this feeling of being free, but at the same time, I feel so lost. I left all that, but now... now, there's nothing left.

Claire let a silence hang before answering.

- I know it's hard, but you know, it's also an opportunity. A chance to start over, to live for yourself. You don't have to carry all this weight on your shoulders. I'm here, I support you, but you have to look at it all differently. It's an opportunity, not an end.

Lara closed her eyes, feeling the warmth of Claire's friendship through the phone, but somehow, Claire's words hit her like a punch. "A chance." A chance to start over. To live for her. How was that possible? She had left Ethan, she had left him, but deep down, she didn't feel like she had made a decision to "liberate." No. It was more complicated than that. It was more painful than that.

- I don't know, Claire. I wanted to leave. I wanted to break free, but all this... it's like a broken dream, you know?

- Yes, but... maybe this is also an opportunity for you to rebuild yourself. To be you. Lara, you have been there for him, for everyone, for years. And now, you have the right to be there for yourself. It's what you deserve, you know that, right?

Lara clutched her phone in her hands, her eyes closed, letting her friend's words invade her. She was right. Maybe. But deep down, she was afraid. She was afraid of being alone. Of losing the love she had known, even if it had disappeared over time. Because love sometimes fades, but it leaves traces. And it wasn't easy to turn the page, to rebuild something that had never really existed.

- Do you think I'll make it? she asked, her voice weak, almost pleading.

- Of course you'll get through this. But it'll take time. It'll take time, Lara. And you know what I'm telling you? Go for it. Live. Don't let this breakup destroy you. Look around you. You have a chance to start over, so take it.

Lara listened to Claire. She tried to see things from a different perspective. It was hard, but maybe Claire was right. Maybe this pain, this emptiness, would eventually pass. Maybe one day, she would wake up in the morning without this feeling of unease, of shame, of regret. She forced herself to smile, even if it was difficult.

- Thanks, Claire. You're right. I just... need time.

- I know. And I'll be there for you, all the time.

After hanging up, Lara found herself alone in the apartment, a little calmer. A little more determined, too. But still fragile. She knew she wasn't going to get up right away. That every day would be a struggle, but that it wasn't the end. No. It wasn't the end. Not yet. She stood up, walked to the window, and looked out. Night had fallen. Everything was quiet. Everything was peaceful. And, for the first time in a long time, she took a deep breath. Maybe the road would be long. But she could do it. She was sure of it.