Chapter 1 Ice Cream

Chapter 1: Ice Cream

The garden was in full bloom this spring season. The roses, tulips and lilies were lending extra colours to the flurry of activity in the garden, as there were plenty of butlers running around to arrange everything. Anything and everything that could be needed for the party the next day, being held on behalf of the young master of Cotswold County.

He was going to turn four tomorrow, and would be a big boy after that- although according to him, he already was a very big boy! So he would be simply establishing his status on the official date, and no one could deny or argue with him at this point.

Because no matter how tiny, sweet and cheerful the young master was, his mother was not the owner of the same personality at all!

Arene Altham.

The name was enough to draw shivers down everyone's spine; the girl with five feet and ten inches height and flowing blonde hair, along with sea green eyes was indeed mesmerising.

But as beautiful as her outer appearance was, the rumours were rampant about her soul being possessed by just as much darkness!

For once, the devil might have a good day and on account of that, decide to show mercy on someone...but she? She wouldn't!

The rumours that were prevalent in the entire Cotswolds started with the gossip of how she didn't live with her family, and nobody knew for sure which family she actually belonged to. Though going by the same gossip, she surely belonged to a very rich and esteemed family that she had been disowned from, because of the heinous crimes she had committed. The list of said crimes started from killing her husband with her own hands, to having murdered his entire family in cold blood because of some kind of rage. But the snippets of reality behind the rumours were nowhere to be found and no testimonies were available, either.

No one knew whom she had married and where this husband of hers actually was, if she was divorced, or whether perhaps her husband had actually died at her own hands. But the longest standing news that had attained the status of a legend among the locals, was that she was one who had operated on her own husband after reaching Cotswold. Even though the County solely belonged to her, four years ago, there had been no fully functional hospitals and this was where she had arrived with her wounded husband and a day-old boy.

Many considered it impossible that the death of her husband had been an accident, as she didn't have so much as a spot of blood on her entire career record apart from this one instance; while some said that she might not have fully recovered at the time of performing the surgery as she also had a small baby in her hands. But nobody knew the undisputed truth, and all they used to feed their curiosity on was either pure gossip or white and grey lies.

However, the speciality associated with the rumours is that they might spread like a forest fire, but they always halt before reaching the person concerned with the rumours as no one wants their neck to be beheaded!

Thus, nobody had ever dared to speak anything in front of Arene or let her get any hints about it, and nor had she ever considered clarifying anything. There were only three people in the entire world who knew the truth, and she didn't trust anyone; anyone apart from them, enough to confide in them.

And hence, she had become the girl she never had been but the rumours had portrayed her as, and was living exactly upto the expectations of everyone by not even showing her smile in public. All that she had shown in front of the people was either anger or authority- nothing else was important for anyone to know from her!

Satisfied with the preparations, she got up from the chair she had been sitting on, to make her way to the main house.

As a reflection of her inner turmoil, thoughts were running wild in her brain.

"Sometimes, life makes us stand at the line where we are forced to think what will we do, if the person whom we love most in this entire world dies? And in front of us, with the worst in our hands?

Then I remind myself that sometimes, life makes us experience this situation first-hand...sometimes, second, and sometimes, nobody knows for how long those stories and experiences have been travelling...how many miles they have run, how many years they have counted.

I also have a story- a story of losing my wish, my will and my reason to live, the story of losing my love, and my life forever after.

Today, on March 12, four years ago- I lost the only reason for which I had been living. I am not living now, because I'm pretty sure that dragging your body and taking in breaths just to function can't be classified as living.

But I can't die as well, because the day I lost him was the day I found the most precious responsibility of my life- my son.

Arin! The reason for my survival, the child whom I had found just after exiting the operation theatre, after being completely responsible for the death of my soul, and him.

Yes, I am the culprit and yet the victim of this twisted situation, because I am Arene Altham! The famous surgeon of the city, who is known to have an entirely impeccable career, with only one death in the whole history of her career- the one death!"

She wanted to laugh! Laugh at her helplessness, when she heard a faint cry in the corridor.

Her heart started racing as if it could leave her body behind, and leap to him.

'My boy, my Arin...why is he crying?'

She rushed towards the lobby, and saw the flurry of butlers and maids circling him, and offering him whatever he could find interesting.

'But how can they forget that even though I haven't given birth to him, he is my child.'

This was when she realised that actually they were yet unaware of the reality, apart from uncle Shefford, her and...nevermind. The truth was that she had brought him up and because of this he was her son and her son only, so he definitely had to be as stubborn as her! But there was one thing, thankfully; that he was not as cold as her- or say, the new Arene.

She rushed downstairs after breaking her thought bubble herself and asked, bending and placing her hands on her knees.

"Arin, child, come here! Come to mumma, and tell me, what happened?"

Before she could have formed the whole scenario and linked the conclusions in her thoughts, she heard someone speaking, someone whose voice was a whole lot like hers, and beckoning to the crying child.

"Mum-mumma... mumma!"

With this cry, her attention was drawn towards her son coming towards her, and her heart melted at the sight of her poor kid racing towards her with his small legs wobbling due to the rush of emotion.

She bent down and picked him up and wiping the fat tears from his pink cheeks, she asked, "What happened to my brave and bold boy Arin? Why is he crying?"

"Mumma, I want a Dad!"

He dropped the bomb on her once again; it was the third day in a row that her poor kid had asked her for something that she couldn't give to him.

'What the hell is wrong with this society, that they have to teach children that a kid needs to have both parents in their life for the sake of normalcy?

And what was wrong with me that I accepted the proposal of sending my Arin to pre-school?!

That's it, it has only been three days and he has already internalised the structure of society! He won't be going back to the place where my child has to suffer the unintentional bullying of other innocent kids, who are just acting according to societal norms.

No! My child will not be following those rules that make him feel excluded. I will be arranging homeschool for him from tomorrow...but for now, I have to calm him down.'

She looked at Arin, who was trying to place his little head on her shoulder with the thumb of his left hand in his mouth, holding her back with the small palm of his right hand.

'Sometimes, I have a sudden realisation and get panicked at how I have raised this little creature to a big yet extremely small boy...how tiny and fragile his body is!'

"Arin, baby, who is mumma's favourite boy?" She asked the question I knew he always had the enthusiasm to answer.

But he kept silent, and her heart just missed a beat.

'Is he alright...?'

She quickly jerked his head backwards carefully, and held him in her outstretched arms. Spinning him around to check if he was fine or not, she shouted for the maids and butlers to bring water and milk- whatever they could, in a hurry.

Almost ten of them ran in different directions to get the required things, only leaving two maids and uncle Shefford there.

It took a few minutes to confirm that Arin didn't have a fever, but his eyes were swollen because of crying.

All this drill did was leave Arene susceptible to the criticising voice inside her head once again, making her pick apart every single act of hers that might have upset her child in such a manner and she lost herself in the thoughts.

'It was true that he has definitely never cried this much before, and I also left him today, for some time. Evidently, I can never be a good mother.'

Looking at uncle Shefford, she asked in a shaking and low voice, as he had been there with her after her mother had passed away. He and the maid, Maria had almost raised her up; if she left out certain people she didn't wish to mention..

"Uncle, what if something has happened-"

"Shh! Arene! Nothing will happen to him, he is just tired of crying, and a little drowsy. Just take him with you and feed him."

"Okay uncle. Maria, send the maids to my room."

Saying this, she gathered Arin in her embrace, holding him tightly to her chest as if somebody was ready to snatch him away.

She started to climb the stairs to her room, and as soon as she sat down on the bed and placed him on her lap, she heard the faint voice of her son again.

"I. I am mumma's favoulite boy."

The sound made her realise that her heart had started beating again.

Looking at him, she spoke with a miffed tone, "When you had heard the question, why didn't you reply earlier? Do you have any idea how badly you have scared your mumma?"

"Solly mumma, but I leally want a Dad! Can't you buy me one?"

No matter how tense or mad she might get, her son's cute mistake of interchanging 'R' and 'L' had always been able to make her happy. But today, this happiness came with a price tag named 'Dad'.

She asked him, without thinking about anything, "Arin...why do you want a dad? Don't you love mumma? Doesn't mumma love you back? Do you want a Dad because you think mumma loves you less?"

"No! My mumma loves me the most, I am hel favoulite boy. And this is why I want a dad, because my mumma only loves me, she doesn't love mumma. And if I have a dad, then he will love mumma."

'He will love mumma- these are the words of a four year old child, my child! How and why has he gotten this idea, and all this time, he wanted a dad because of me? And not because all his friends have one?'

Completely blindsided by this unexpected reason for his demand, the thoughts fully immersed in emotions started clouding her mind, and before she lost her track again she asked.

"Arin, baby you know what? Mumma doesn't want a Dad, all mumma wants is that Arin loves her the most! Okay?"

"Alin loves mumma the most...yes! Alin loves mumma, but Alin is a small boy. How can Alin protect his mumma?"

Arin became too happy for a moment, and the very next moment, he was lost in his deep thoughts like a philosopher straight out of ancient Greece.

"Hmm...let me think. By coming with mumma to buy an ice cream? What do you say?"

Arene heard her voice echoing back in her ears without her consent, for the second time that day.

"Yes! Yes!"

He started throwing his hands upwards, still crouching in her lap.

She stood up, holding him and taking the keys of the car. Before leaving, she made sure to let the maids know that there will be no need for preparing dinner for either of them, as she was going to spend her entire time with her son.

___________________________