Chapter 6 Birthday

**Zara**

Darkness. All I saw was darkness, it was so good to just float in nothingness, feeling my body free and without pain.

I felt welcomed in the nothingness, my mind at ease as if nothing else could reach me. If this was my death, I was happy. There was no pain here, in fact, there was nothing, just the sweet peace of non-existence.

That's what I thought, but even in the darkness, I felt something pulling me, as if someone was trying to reach me.

I got scared, I didn't want to go back to the pain, it was so good here, no one could find me here. If I went back, James would beat me again, and this time I knew he would kill me for disrespecting him.

But this consciousness that pulled me was stronger than I was, and even though I fought, I felt it slowly invading my mind. "Zara!" I heard an unfamiliar voice, it confused me. I didn't know how it knew my name if we were in the void.

"Zara, wake up!" it insisted, but I didn't want to. It was good here, I didn't want to suffer again, and I knew that if I woke up, that's what would happen.

"ZARA!" I was startled by the tone of the voice, it was louder in my head, and fear filled my body. "You need to wake up, Zara!" it said, but I could hear the concern in its voice. "I don't want to, it's so good here," I said, even though I knew it had to be a hallucination in my head.

"Don't you remember what day it is today?" the voice asked, and that left me confused. Since James had locked me up, I hadn't kept track of the days, so I had no idea what day it was.

"I don't know," I said in a whisper. "Yesterday was your birthday, Zara," it said cheerfully, and that surprised me. I didn't know my birthday had already passed. "That doesn't matter anymore," I told her. I knew my end was near, so it didn't matter if my birthday had passed.

"You don't understand, now I can help you," it said excitedly again. That left me confused. If there was one thing I knew, it was that no one ever came for me, so the fact that a voice in my head was saying it would help me was at least comical. If I could have, I would have laughed.

"That's impossible," I told her. "It's not. Now that I'm free, I can finally help you," that caught my attention. I wanted to ask why she was imprisoned, but I couldn't.

"Who are you?" I asked, a little hesitant. "I'm your wolf, Nala." That surprised me for a second. "I have a wolf?" I asked, doubting. "Of course you do, Zara. You didn't feel it because you were unconscious when your birthday happened," she explained with a tone of sadness in her voice.

"Then we can get out of here!" I said to her, excited. Finally, I could disappear from that place, go far away where James would never find me. "Unfortunately not," she said. "Why not?" I asked, desperate. I didn't want to stay here anymore, and I knew my only chance was when I had my wolf, and now she was telling me I couldn't.

"I can't shift, there's too much aconite in your body, and it prevents my transformation, not to mention that you're very weak." Her words opened a hole in my chest. In the end, I had fought so hard for nothing. In the middle of those conflicting emotions, I woke up, the sun hitting my face hard, making my eyes hurt.

I could only open one of my eyes, and I knew the other must be swollen from James's punches. I looked around and saw myself in the same position as before, my hands were a strange color, and I knew it must be from being tied up for so long.

I felt the pain return all at once and clenched my teeth to hold back a scream of agony. I wasn't going to give that pleasure to James. I had always been submissive, doing everything he wanted, and yet he always beat me and humiliated me. Since I was going to die, I would die in silence, not giving him the pleasure of hearing me scream.

"You're not going to die, we're getting out of this," said Nala in my mind. "I think you still don't understand our situation. I just regret that you won't be able to see more of the world," I told her. I also wanted to see more of the world, but we didn't always get what we wanted.

"We'll get out of here, I can feel it. You just need to stay strong for one more day," she replied. "How are you so sure of that?" I asked, trying to understand where her hope came from.

"He's coming, Zara, I can feel it." I didn't ask who he was, nor did I fully believe I was talking to her. Everything was confusing to me at that moment.

"You're still alive," said James's voice behind me. I felt fear take over me again when I heard him, but I remembered that I was dying, so I didn't need to be afraid anymore. "It's a surprise that you're still alive after all this time, but it's also a good thing. Now I can have a little more fun with you. I'd hate for my favorite toy to break."

His words disgusted me. I didn't understand his fixation with me, nor why he insisted on beating me, but that was an answer I would never get from him.

I heard the familiar sound of the whip being dipped in aconite. He must have known that I already had my wolf, but unlike before, it didn't scare me. I just wanted to rest, and only death could bring me that rest.

The moment the first lash hit my skin, I saw my vision blur from the pain. I bit my lips, drawing blood to keep from screaming.

"Let's see how long you stay silent," he said, hitting me with the whip again.

I could hear the hatred in his voice as he beat me, but I couldn't scream, he wouldn't have that pleasure. I could hear the frustration in every breath he took, and that gave me satisfaction. But I was too weak, I had already lost too much blood, and not long after, I got lost in the darkness again, my favorite place at that moment.