Chapter 2 2 - Jude

'And you come with me.'

Sh*t. Ok, maybe I had gone just a little bit too far with Isa. Dahlia had never had such... Dominance in her voice with me before but f*ck. It was hot. Sure, that wasn't the point but it was. Even I had to admit I was being an asshole but to be fair, I'd never really had a brother before and we hadn't exactly grown up with one another.

I never even knew that he existed until a few years ago when he just showed up.

"Dahlia, I can explain..." I said once I entered the booth with her.

My mind immediately instead went to all sorts of dirty directions that I knew it probably shouldn't have gone. Somehow I wasn't sure if now was exactly the time for something like that. When the curtain fully closed though, I stared at her. "Ok, know what, nevermind. I can't really explain it."

She just stared at me and I almost felt like she was judging me from it. Pulling her hair slowly up into a messy bun, I bit back a groan as I watched her. Not the time, Jude.

"That kid has been going through hell," She started, her voice eerily calm. "Somehow I just get the feeling you don't know about any of it though?"

I was silent as I listened to her. She was right, I didn't know about any of it because how would I? I hadn't seen him in years now. He was always a bit of a pest to me but I just didn't know how to handle him at all. Her eyes seemed to search my face for something before she nodded slowly.

"I'm not going to go and judge you two, I don't know what your relationship is with him fully but I do know from that small bit of time we've spent together? You're never like this."

I just stared at her and then looked away. I really couldn't figure out why I acted like I did myself. Shrugging my shoulders at her as if I were nothing more than a little kid getting held up in detention for picking on a younger kid I breathed out some air and looked back at her as I spoke.

"We're brothers. Brothers fight. It's not that unusual is it?"

Ok so that was definitely aa lie. Isa had been incredibly close to my ex-mate, Ashlyn and seeing him just brought back memories of her and truthfully? That made me angry. Not at Isa himself but... I just hated thinking about her. Thinking about how things ended. That period of time had been painful and I didn't want to relive it.

And that was honestly something that I didn't want to tell Dahlia because you didn't just go around and talk about your ex with someone you had romantic interest in. I liked Dahlia, a lot. That may have been a conversation for another point in time but not right now that was for sure.

"Siblings fight, yes. But... you didn't even speak to him as if he..." She paused and breathed in deeply, holding her hands up some. "It's not my place."

She was right and I knew she was, she didn't even need to fully finish that sentence. I didn't treat him like he was my brother or any form of family. I treated him like he was absolute sh*t, I did it more often than I wanted to ever fully acknowledge. I couldn't help it though, I just... sh*t. I could help it. I just didn't want to.

"Do you you know about his kids? The situation with his ex-mate? Any of that stuff? He's spent the better half of a decade now blaming himself for what happened and I'm honestly surprised that hybrid or not he hasn't drank himself to death." She frowned as she spoke, clearly they were close.

Her nails drummed idly oon her leg, I watched as she seemed to put her words together in her head that she wanted to say. Like she was almost skating on thin ice and trying to make sure she didn't cause any cracks anywhere. I hated it.

"Downside to being a bartender you know. Sometimes you're also stepping in as someone's therapist and he's had absolutely no one around but me to talk to." She looked at me, giving a sad smile.

I stiffened some as I took in all of that, every detail of her words about Isa. It wasn't that I hated him, because I didn't hate him at all. Before, when we had first met there was alot of resentment between us because well, Isa got the family and father that I never could have. I resented him for it more than I did anything and that formed in the way of me treating him as shittily as I did.

Now I was having issues with him because the moment I looked at him tonight. The second I saw those eyes. The very second that I acknowledged just who he was, I thought of Ashlyn and it hurt more than anything. Ashlyn didn't leave entirely at first, she pretended to stay with me and live int he condo until Jeremy would go to sleep then every night she'd take off doing who knew what.

Then, once he turned eighteen she was gone just like that. She didn't wait. She was out of our lives. 'Jeremy doesn't need me anymore, it's ok.' she said. Part of me wanted to scream back at her 'But, I do!' but I hadn't. I let her go. Any reminder of that killed me. It was why I drank so much, so that I didn't constantly think of Ashlyn. So I didn't remember those times. Isa probably didn't deserve that though, I knew it.

"I had no idea..." I said slowly, pressing my lips together. "Last I heard of him, he was dead. Look... I don't hate him if that's what you're thinking, I don't. We just have some complicated -" I couldn't even finish that sentence because I didn't know how to respond to it. Grunting I looked away from her.

What did I say to her? 'Yeah, he reminds me of my ex-mate and because of that I just can't stand being around him. I know it's not his fault but he brings up bad memories!' Because that would've gone over great with her. It probably would've made her lose any interest that she remotely had in me, if she even had any. I wished I knew if she did or not, it would've made all of this easier in the end but I hadn't asked and didn't think now was a great time to ask about it.

She cared though, that was better than nothing. If she didn't she would've never done this or treated us like she did.

Knowing I upset her enough to do this though and force us apart like she did? I felt horrible. I was taking away from her work time, away from her living and for what? So she could babysit me and my brother? F*ck I needed a drink. I scrubbed a hand down over my face, rolling my shoulders some as I watched her intently.