Chapter 4 Four

Tristen

It ate me up seeing that man dancing with Ashley, so I had to do something, I had to put under the relationship that she thought she was about to build. She has nothing to do with being a musician.

I glide through my office files, rearranging the schedule. The only wedding we have to plan next is Mateo's wedding, but there's a fifteen year old on the list, celebrating her sweet quinceanera at the end of the week, so we have to get everything ready for the little girl's big day.

I sent for Ashley and she'll be here any moment. Taunting her life gives me a sense of fulfillment, even though I don't like it. I put up a straight, no nonsense face.

"Come in," I shout back at her.

She walks in slowly and afraid. I like it. Her brunette hair is packed up in a ponytail, bringing out her brown eyes and her full, pouted cherry lips. Ashley doesn't need makeup to look beautiful, another thing I hate and I like about her: she's irresistible.

Her hands are clasped together at the front and her shoulders are slouched, her head bent in fear. I don't care. "So, how far have you gotten for the birthday tonight?"

Her voice is strangled, like a hurt wolf crying for help. "It's going well, Tristen. I have the cakes ready and the teenager's lounge. It's just to wait for the guest to arrive. The theme of the party is the sea, so we ordered seafood and we are waiting for all of them." Her words don't come out properly, and she's visibly shaking.

I nod my head. "I want to talk about the wedding the other day."

Her light skin gets pale, like someone expecting the outcome of her examination. "Okay..."

"So, you did well in some parts. I liked the coordination a bit, but you'd have done better in some ways. Like that band, the song was such a bore. I can't praise the food really well."

I'm lying about the band. They were amazing to the core. Their music set a lot of people on their feet and made the wedding a fun place, but I saw the sparkle in the eyes of the lead guitarist, and I also saw the sparkle in Ashley's eyes. I watched as he moved to ask for a dance, so I knew I had to step in and prevent it all from happening. Even in the future.

"So, I don't want you hiring them again. There are better band players here in Los Angeles, you can scout for them." I look at her standing almost comfortably now, so I shake her. "Are you getting notes on this?"

She dives for a book and pen. "I didn't know I'm meant to take notes." She scribbles down everything I said in a jiffy and I can't help but commend her current swiftness.

I reclined to my office chair. "Okay, so, I have a wedding you need to plan. Get this well, you get promoted with a double pay, get it wrong, I throw you out. I know you have no place to go to, so you have to do this well."

She nods. "I understand."

"My best friend's wedding is coming up very soon. You heard me clearly: my best friend, and I don't joke with the people close to me. You don't flunk this up. I'm placing you in charge of the bride and all other expenses: the flowers, the food, the dresses... everything. You have to focus on this project and don't make out with some 'musician.'"

I don't know if she gets everything I'm saying, but her hand moves at great speed. I smile. She needs to get on her toes to work, not recline and watch the universe do everything for her. "Did you get it all?"

"Yes, I did."

"The wedding is a bit far from now, but I'm telling you this to plan ahead. Remember the agreement: you fail, you leave; you do well, you get promoted. When the groom and bride arrive, I'll tell you. For now, get ready."

She nods. "Anything else, Tristen?"

Her vulnerability quirks me. I'm tempted to stand up to her, hold her by the waist, and draw her into a deep kiss, but I can't do it. The first time was a mistake, but we wouldn't agree the second one is, it can lead to the third, and the fourth, and the fifth, until it no longer becomes a secret. Trisha already knows my stand on marriage and how I refuse it. If she sees that there's chemistry between Ashley and I, she'll get offended that I'm using her best friend as a toy. Something I do not want to do.

I kick the urge aside and bend my head toward my laptop. I raise up my hand and do the leaving gestures. "You may go."

She curtsies-which pisses me off-and turns to leave. As she touches the knob of the door, I'm tempted to look at her face again. "One more thing," I say.

She turns. "Yes?"

"No more band boys asking for a dance. You have to focus."

Her cheeks blush scarlet. "Yes, Tristen."

As she leaves my office, I feel the same all over: the feeling of want, the feeling of acceptance. There was someone. There is always someone.

And Ashley reminds me of her.

I sigh, keying my energy back to work. I have decided to forget the Navy entirely, but her face keeps popping on. I once gave love a chance and she trashed it, giving it all up to the fleet admiral.

She was all I had, and all I lived for. We went through the slim and the fat, the thick and the thin, we were literally unbreakable. An irresistible force.

When I decided to be part of the Navy, she cried her eyes out, wanting to be with me. In her words, she said that the Navy would build up a wall against us, and that we should look for a way to be together, moving to the camp as a couple.

I loved her. I loved her brown, puppy-dog eyes. The kind of eyes that would melt your heart to do her well. The kind of eyes Ashley has.

"Are you sure you want to give up everything you have just to be with me in the Navy?" that was what I asked her when she sobbed in my hands.

Her tears touched my hands. "Yes. I'll go anywhere you want to go. I love you, Tristen."

And that was what brought us to the Navy together.

We lived together in love, we sent gifts to one another, and every time I came home from a hard round of training, she'd be up, waiting for me with a meal in hand. Our love blossomed the first, second, and part of the third year. Even the other lieutenant cheered me at my relationship, wishing to be me. I thought it would last forever, but I was a fool. Nothing lasts forever.

But I found out at the wrong time. At the time when my heart was dipped in hers.

Her attitude changed over the course of time. She nagged a lot and complained I didn't have time for her. She was withdrawn from me, always bearing a gloomy face. I tried my best to be there for her, I bought her gifts when I could, but it seemed like her mind was made up.

Days passed as I thought of what I could do to better my relationship. Little did I know that she was going behind my back and was making out with the admiral.

It was one day when I popped into his house unnoticed to give a report. The living room was empty and dark, with clothes littered everywhere. It was a confidential file I couldn't keep in my hands for long, so I had to deliver it to him. I walked down to his room wanting to have nothing to do with the papers again.

I heard noises at first, but I pushed it aside, trying to get home on time in order to please her. I held the file and clutched it to my chest, walking to the room that the noise came out from.

Getting there, the door was slightly ajar, so I knocked. I should have waited for her to hide. I should have waited for him to give me orders to come in, that way, my heart wouldn't have been shattered in a bad shape.

But, no. I pushed the door.

There was my fiance, naked in a man's bed. A man that could be twice her age. Her clothes were on the floor, her shoes kicked to a corner, with his sheet above her breasts.

The admiral was in the least shaken to see me. His baritone voice sprang out, unshaken as it was. "What do you have for me, my boy?"

My eyes were on the verge of tears. I would have broken down, but I vented my anger on the poor, confidential paper. With the edges squeezed, I tossed it to the floor. "Take your silly papers. And my wife. I don't need her any longer."

I didn't know if she left her potbellied boyfriend to run after me, I actually didn't care if she did or if she didn't, because I wouldn't listen to her. I walked away from the admiral's house and from her life.

Remembering the Navy always brings angry tears to my eyes.

And I've vowed never to love again.

And here Ashley is, trying to make me fall for her all over again.

I remember Ashley very well. The girl who lived next to us. The last time I saw her, she was a fifteen year old teenager that wore baggy clothes and packed her hair in a ludicrous pigtail. She was hard to forget, because of her braces. I always laughed at her when she came home to see Trisha.

She was clumsy also.

She broke literally everything: china plates, tea cups, vases, and any breakable thing she could lift. I was irritated by her presence, even though she drooled over me.

I'm not too sure now she likes me, because she is more composed in front of me now. Ashley has changed in a lot of ways that I can't imagine.

I smile at my laptop, picturing her genuine smile that doesn't falter. But I can't do anything at the moment. My hands are tied behind my back. If I give her the chance to come into my life, I'm no different from the admiral who was almost twice my fiance's age. I don't want to be like that admiral. I have to suppress whatever feelings I have for Ashley. I don't know how, but I have to.

For the sake of me, for the sake of Trisha, and especially, for the sake of Ashley.

I sigh. This is about to get tough. Tougher than all the training that I experienced in the navy.

Even tougher than getting over my fiance.