Chapter 6 The Expired Mint

𝔜ou know, I think I might had misjudged this school a little bit, yes, the kids were a complete aggravating set of douchebags and the whole school uniform thingy was off-putting for me but apart from that, I would say everything else was pretty great.

I had a new friend, even though he's an annoying doofus, the teaching was way better than it was in Dayleside and to top it all up, I got invited by a girl to her house. I tried not to get too excited about it, I mean Kylee only wanted to show me some fun stuff to do after school even though I completely had no idea what that meant.

We had Geography as the last class for the day and I couldn't wait for the school bell to ring but then I would wish it wouldn't ring and then I would get excited again and wish for it to ring. The blend of excitement and nervousness was a rare emotion mix but I found a way to make it work.

"You should stop fidgeting," Dave said as we walked out of class after the bell was finally rung.

"I'm not fidgeting," I told him.

"Look at your hands," he said pointing with his eyes on my digits, "you're like a vibrator."

"Oh, Jesus, do you always have to be so disgusting?"

"It's going to be alright," Dave exclaimed as he forced his books into his locker, "It's obvious Kylee likes you so I don't think there's anything you can do to fuck this up, she's a nice person."

"But why though?" I asked.

"Why what?"

"Why does she like me? I mean you're the one who said it, I'm like the nerdiest of nerds." I took off my glasses and cleaned the frame.

"You know you're actually quite good looking without those goggles of despair on your face," Dave said, "Maybe that's why."

"You're the one who said Sloane was way out of my league, what makes Kylee any different?"

"Uh, because she actually probably likes you?"

"Really? That was the same thing we thought about Sloane."

"We?" Dave laughed comically, "Dag, cut the crap, that was all you, don't do the 'we' thing with your fuck ups, okay."

"Ughhh!" I facepalmed, "I'm exceedingly nervous, Dave."

"Okay, calm down," Dave placed his hands on my shoulders, "Now breathe."

I looked at him numbly. "I'm not doing that."

"Just... just go to her house like you're going to see a friend, don't take it too seriously." Dave shrugged.

Dave might had been on to something, I started to have the feeling that Kylee might not even like me and she's just been very very nice because honestly Kylee felt like that kind of person, a person who is... very very nice.

"So, you're saying I should just act normal, like it's a normal friend's house I'm going to not the house of a girl I actually like?" We started walking down the hallway.

"Bingo," Dave said, "Unless of course... she would want to have sex with you." Dave's voice seemed to get quieter as he said the words, intentionally too, it seemed.

"Hold on, hold on, what did you just say?"

"Huh?"

"What did you just say, Dave," I asked again, stopping him in his tracks, "Something about sex."

"I said, unless Kylee wants to have sex with you."

"W... why?" I stammered, "What would make you think that?"

"Are you seriously that archaic?" Dave asked, "A girl is inviting you to her house after school, obviously there's a possibility that she might want to have sex with you."

"You put possibility and might in the same sentence," I corrected him, "and by the way, it's not my fault if I don't sexualize women that much to think that it's only sex they want."

"I never said it's only sex she wants, you dum dum," Dave snapped, "I said there's a possibility that Kylee might want to have sex with you."

"You did it again."

"I'm saying exactly what I said, of course I had to do it. You don't have to be a nerd about everything."

"I'm not a nerd about everything, I just... I don't know, man."

"If Kylee kisses you and starts to get all touchy with you, you're telling me you ain't gonna like that?"

"Mhm," I bit my lip. "Obviously, I would but I just haven't... I haven't you know."

"Holy shit, you're a virgin," Dave exclaimed, "You're a virgin!" A few people passing the hall turned to look at us.

"Are you sure that's loud enough?" I asked him sarcastically, "Mhm? Or do you want a fucking microphone and a speaker so you can announce it to the damn school."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he said, "Dagwood Ackley is a virgin, wow."

"Now do you understand why I'm a little nervous about what you said?"

"Yes, yes," Dave smiled. "I'm sorry, I just can't believe that you're actually a virgin, oh scratch that I can, I can."

"You know, now I feel like you're making fun of me." I frowned.

"I'm sorry, my bad," he said, "Okay, serious time. You have to take a condom with you."

"What?"

"Yes," he said with eyes almost popping out, "You have to be ready."

"No, no way."

"Look, I'm not saying you're gonna have sex with Kylee because God knows it's gonna be a surprise to me of you did, but you need to go there prepared, there's nothing like being prepared."

"Oh Jesus, Dave, what do you want me to do? Go up to a store and say I want a condom?"

"Uhm, duh, isn't that how it's usually done?"

"I can't do it, Dave. I would totally breakdown in front of the shop owner."

Dave gave a sigh of frustration, "Good thing I have a spare with me."

"You have a spare condom with you?"

"In my backpack."

"In your backpack? What the fuck?"

"Dave, this is teenhood for boys one-o-one, you have to be ready, always." He unzipped his backpack and handed me the sachet of rubber.

I looked at it for a while, feeling it's texture on my palm and coming to terms with what I might have to use to do. It was the first time I had ever held a condom and I was dying with nervousness when I hadn't even started to use it yet. I looked at Dave.

"What if it's not my size?" I asked him.

"Not your size? Like what do you mean, smaller or bigger?"

I hesitated before I answered, "Bigger."

Dave started laughing mockingly and then tapped me on my shoulder, "It's not bigger, man. It's definitely not bigger."

"Hey, guys"

𝘖𝘩, 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵

I quickly stuck the condom into my pocket. "Oh, hey, hey Kylee," I smiled anxiously, "How you doing?"

"I'm... good," she said, smiling while she looked at the both of us suspiciously, "What's that?"

"Oh, that?" I asked, "That's uhm mint, yeah mint."

"Mint? I'd love some, can I h-"

"It's expired," I quickly said, "It's expired... mint."

Dave smiled nervily, "Yeah, the mint... the mint is expired."

Kylee's eyes bounced back and forth between Dave and I, "Okay, why are you saving it then?"

"Mhm, good question," Dave said "Why are you saving it, uhm... Dag?"

"It's uh... for my mom, yeah," I replied, "She's pregnant so she's really into some weird stuff and expired mint just happens to be one of them." I shrugged.

Kylee flushed, "Okay, whatever is up with you two, I'm not exactly sure that I want to find out."

"Oh, that's great," Dave said, "Us neither."

Kylee looked at him and then back at me.

"Yeah, right. Are we still on for today, Dag?" she asked.

"Yes, sure. I'm not missing this for anything," I replied.

"Alright," she stretched her hand and I held it, "Let's go then."

I smiled childishly and followed her out of the hallway.

Hearing the beep of my phone, I took it out of my pocket and read the text on the screen from Dave.

𝚁𝙴𝙼𝙴𝙼𝙱𝙴𝚁 𝚃𝙾 𝙿𝚄𝚃 𝙾𝙽 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝙳𝙾𝙼 𝙰𝙵𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚈𝙾𝚄 𝙶𝙴𝚃 𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙳 𝙽𝙾𝚃 𝙱𝙴𝙵𝙾𝚁𝙴.

Son of a bitch.

☞✧☜

Kylee's house was almost exactly what I expected it to be. It was a bit like a mansion just not as big and it had a very beautiful fountain in the middle of the flower garden by the side of the house. It was painted gray and had a bit of black and white thrown into it. The windows were gold and there was a huge chandelier outside her front porch.

Okay, I might have cheated, the reason I knew her house was going to be like that was because she schooled in Cardenas, obviously she was rich.

"Are your parents home?" I asked her as we entered inside the building.

"My dad," she said.

"Your dad?"

"Yes, he's home. My mom is uhm..."

"Oh, I'm really sorry, my bad... I shouldn't have."

"It's okay," she smiled, "Come on, I want you to meet him."

"Okay."

Inside Kylee's house was elegantly beautiful, it wasn't too flashy but it was obviously expensive and prepossing. There were pictures of paintings all over the building and as we walked to the living room there was another huge painting of a woman. I assumed it to be Kylee's mom, she had bright blonde hair just as Kylee and she-

"Kylee." A deep male voice startled me from behind. Kylee and I turned around.

"Dad!" she exclaimed as she scurried towards the man and hugged him. I just stood there, flabbergasted at the sight of Kylee's hunk of a father. That sounds so inappropriate but that was what he was.

"Dad, this is Dagwood, he prefers you call him Dag..."

𝘕𝘰, 𝘯𝘰, 𝘯𝘰, 𝘒𝘺𝘭𝘦𝘦. 𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘴, 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘣𝘭𝘦.

"Dag, this is my dad," she said turning to me.

"Hello, Mr Briggs, it's an honour to meet you, really." I walked over to him and shook his hand.

"It's an honour to meet you too," he replied, looking at me in a confused way that I began to think I had worn my glasses upside down like I used to do. "Excuse me, you're a guy, right?"

𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬?

"Uhm... yeah?" I replied, "I think so..."

"A guy," he repeated as he looked at Kylee, "You actually brought a guy home, finally."

𝘞𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐'𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘨𝘶𝘺 𝘒𝘺𝘭𝘦𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦? 𝘓𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳?

"You're the first guy Kylee has brought home," he said to me, "Like ever."

𝘖𝘩, 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘦𝘹𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘦'𝘴 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨.

I blushed. "Wow."

"Dad, you really don't have to disgrace me in front of my friend," Kylee said, she was even blushing more than I was.

"No, no, I'm really happy for you, I am," Mr Briggs said, "Dagwood is nice to see you, I'm looking forward to getting to know you."

"Thank you Mr Briggs," I replied.

"Call me Paul."

"Then call him Dag," Kylee remarked as she grabbed my hand and scurried up the stairs leaving me to keep up behind her.

"Okay, now you two be good kids up there!" Paul yelled after us.

"Don't come into my room!" Kylee yelled back.

𝘑𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘮 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐.

Kylee shut her door as we entered inside her room, the first thing I noticed was the giant white teddy bear by the side of her huge bed.

"Nice teddy," I said.

She looked at it and giggled, "Thanks," she said, "And uhm, I'm sorry about him."

"What, your dad?" I asked, "He's super cool, I was not expecting him to be like that at all."

Kylee smiled, "Really? Well, what were you expecting?"

𝘛𝘳𝘢𝘱 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘢 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘱 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯.

"I don't really know," I replied, "Most dads aren't like that so I guess I wasn't expecting your dad to be."

"I guess he is kinda cool sometimes."

"He is," I said, "Your room is so sick."

"You think so?" Kylee asked.

"Of course, you're definitely the most organized and tidiest people I know," I said, "I would have stained all these whites."

"Thanks, I guess." She had a funny but cute look on her face as she chortled uncontrollably.

"So, what's the first thing, people usually do after school?" I asked.

"We're not gonna do it here," she said as she hung her backpack in her wardrobe.

"We're not?"

"Of course not," she said, "What the fuck are we gonna do here?"

𝘕𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘷𝘰𝘭𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘰𝘮 𝘩𝘪𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘱𝘰𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘵, 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦.

"So, why exactly are we here?" I asked her.

"I wanted you to see my room," she replied, "You'd probably be seeing more of it from now one anyway."

I raised my eyebrows at her and she bit her lip.

"I'm still on my uniform tho," I said.

"Me too," she replied, "Come on let's get downstairs."

☞✧☜

I wouldn't say the rest of the events that unfolded were dullish because it was genuinely the most fun I had ever had in a while. Kylee and I walked around the garden for a while and then she tried to force me to go swimming with her. She unsuccessful because I didn't have my swimming trunk with me and the underwear I had on was plain white.

She swam though, and I watched her swim and it was a very satisfying sight if I may say so myself. Then she, her dad and I did a little cooking in their huge kitchen. I had to learn to cook from mom as soon as she found out she was pregnant, she knew was going to needed the help and I always wanted to learn how to cook.

We made cookies and then popcorn before Kylee grabbed some ice-cream and dragged me to the smaller living room which was up the stairs.

I never really liked romance movies, they seemed to always irk me or constantly remind me that I might never have that kind of relationship with someone. And also, most of the time, the couple don't even end up being together, they always break up with some shitty line like "If you love someone you have to let them go," or "Maybe we were made to be friends not lovers."

𝘉𝘶𝘭𝘭𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵.

Anyway, twenty-five minutes into the movie and Kylee places her head on my lap as she watched.

"Have you ever fallen in love with someone?" she asked.

"Me? No not really."

"Why not?"

"I don't know," I replied, "Sometimes I like to pretend that the reason is that I don't have time for it, for love, that all I have to do is study."

"You can't plan love, you know," she said, "It just... happens."

"Yeah, I know."

I felt her breathe deeply as she laid on my lap. "I'm going to say something," she said softly.

"Okay," I replied, "Go ahead."

"I..." She hesitated a bit,

"I like you, Dag," she said, "Is that alright?"

I was almost unable to speak from the surprise, my hair stood and I felt goosebumps at the back of my neck. "No, uhm. It's perfectly fine. It's alright."

"Okay," she replied in the same soft calm manner.

"Why do you... " I tightened my lips, 𝘚𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘐 𝘢𝘴𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴? I thought to myself. "Why do you uhm... like me."

Kylee raised her head slowly from my lap and looked me in the face, there was a bit of popcorn on her nose.

"I don't know," she replied. "I guess you sorta just happened too."

She slowly drew her face closer to mine and I expected to freeze right there at the spot, I expected myself to just sit there not knowing what I was doing but I drew my face closer to her too and our lips slowly collided as we kissed. Her mouth kept pushing into mine and mine into hers, it was the most sensual thing I had ever experienced. I touched her cheek as we kept on kissing and she locked her palm around my neck. I didn't want to stop kissing her, not ever.

☞✧☜

"You guys did what?" Dave exclaimed.

"We kissed," I repeated to him, "I think we're a thing now."

"Oh my fucking gosh, I am so proud of you."

"For kissing a girl?"

"For not letting your nervous nerdy side stop you from getting what you want."

I rolled my eyes. Dave and I arrived in school together the next morning and it was a Friday so it was casual day, where everyone wore anything that wasn't the school uniform. We walked to his locker as he tried to pull out what I guessed was a text book out of his locker.

"Don't you think you should just arrange the damn locker?" I asked him.

"Hey, don't you talk ill of my locker," he playfully remarked. "Besides, you're the one who should be more gingerly now that you have a girlfriend."

"We haven't put a tag on it yet."

"But that's what she is, isn't it," he teased, "Your girlfriend."

"Dave."

The school beg rung.

"Oh shit, I gotta wee," he exclaimed, "save a seat for me."

"Don't get your hopes up." I yelled at him as he scurried off.

Groaning about the weight of my backpack, I walked to my locker and took out my history textbook.

"Hello, Dagwood." I heard a familiar voice say.

I shut my locker and was almost startled to see Sloane Galloway standing beside me, resting her shoulder on the row of lockers.

"Is there a nicer way to say 'fuck off'?" I asked her, "I'm asking to make sure I don't use it."

"Save your smart remarks," she said, rolling her eyes, "I'm not here on my own accord."

"I don't give two fucks why you're here, Sloane. Just get out of my face."

"Well, someone is a bit sour," she mocked, " Is it because of our little prank? Come on Dag, let it go, we can be friends now."

"I rather be friends with a dead goat."

She had a cocky smile on her face that made me so angry I wanted to rip it off.

"There's a party at Riley Millburn's place."

"Who the fuck is Riley Millburn?"

"My best friend?" she replied, rolling her eyes, "Come on Ackley, keep up, everyone knows my friends."

"Yeah, what makes you think that?"

"Because they're my friends, duh."

𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘨𝘰𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘤 𝘣𝘪𝘵𝘤𝘩.

"You're way over your head, Sloane."

"By the way, she wants you to come, I think she has a crush on you or whatever and she's shy to tell you so she asked me to."

I eyed her momentarily, a bit annoyed at the fact that she thought I was still that gullible.

"Your friend... has a crush on me?" I asked her.

"Mhm hmm."

"And she sends you to tell me, out of all the other friends you have, she sends you when you're obviously the one I hate the most."

"She asked me to tell you, she didn't send me to do anything. Also, I'm the only one amongst my friends who has actually talked to you."

"If you think I'm falling for one of your dumbass pranks again then you're an idiot."

"Think of it however you want," Sloane said, pouting, "But it's not a prank."

"Yeah right," I bolted my locker and walked away, "Stay the hell away from me, Sloane."

As I was about to walk into History class I saw Kylee approach me.

"Hey," she said.

"Hey," I replied, smiling.

"What was that about?" she asked as she looked behind me, seeing Sloane who I had left behind.

"She was trying to invite me to a party at one of her friend's house, Riley Millburn," I replied, "She says the friend has a crush on me."

Kylee raised her eyebrows, smiling.

"I told her no of course," I replied, "It's an obvious trap for a prank and I'm done with Sloane Galloway."

Kylee kept smiling as she looked at me.

"What?" I asked.

"You know what?" she said, "I think we should go."

"What, you serious?"

"Yep, you and I," she replied, "If it's a prank they want, we'll both show up together. Let's see how they react."

I smiled, "Well, if that's what you want, fine by me."

She kissed me on the lips and although she caught me by surprise, I kissed back.

"So, after school?" she asked.

"Yeah," I replied, blushing. "After school."

𝘔𝘢𝘯, 𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦.