Chapter 2 2

THE LONELY ONES 2

PHOENIX'S POV

Stars.

I've always loved to watch the stars when I was younger. Probably ten years old or something. Don't even fucking remember, but I loved watching them. I would just stand by my open window, perched on it as I stared at the stars in the sky. Maybe it was a girl thing to do, maybe it sounded or looked fucked up, but I always had this sense of peace each time I stared at the sky.

It reminded me I was always gonna be okay. And I believed that.

With my eyes shut, all I can see are stars. Countless stars. Reminding me I am okay and I'll always be okay. Fuck, I was high as hell. Wasted even, and I don't even know what time it is. I don't even know where I am and I don't dare open my eyes.

It's been two weeks since we moved to Blue Meadow. Yeah, weird name for a little town. I thought so too. Well, when we got here, the town was pretty great. I made some new shitty friends and I went out partying with them last night at one of their houses. So I guess I'm pretty much still in this person's apartment high as fuck.

I hear the familiar ringtone from my phone and I groan.

Who the fuck is that?

The phone doesn't stop ringing. I blindly reach for it on the bed I'm lying on and mute it, tossing it off the bed with annoyance.

" Phoenix!" A familiar female voice calls my name.

What?

God, my head hurts. I touch my head and slowly pry my eyes open.

" Phoenix, open the damn door. Mom wants you downstairs. It's time for school." The voice says again, followed by loud knocking on my door.

School? School! Shit.

I bolt up at once, pressing the heel of my palms on my eyes.

" Phoenix. Fucking get up!" My sister's voice calls my name again. " Or I'm breaking your door and forcing myself in."

Oh fuck. She can't see me like this.

I bolt to my feet and rush to the door.

" Anna, go away, I'm gonna get ready and come downstairs for breakfast." I say, with my hands on my door, readying myself to stop her in case she decides to force herself in.

Anna is an ass. She's 16 and a total sweetheart sometimes. She acts like my older sister sometimes, and trust me, it's annoying.

" Fine. 20 minutes. I want your ass downstairs or mom's gonna come kick your ass." I hear her receding footsteps as she speaks.

" Fuck." I turn around with my back pressed against my door as I slide down to the floor, with my elbows on my knees as I run my fingers through my hair.

Slightly sober and fully awake, I stare at my crappy room. The drapes are drawn close, with morphines, and cracks scattered on my table, including syringes.

Yeah, I'm a fucking junkie and I'm not proud of myself. I'm sometimes ashamed of myself.

My parents don't know. They'd make me feel like shit so I try all the time to hide the needle marks on my arm with long sleeves each time I shoot up. The Monroe's are great people. They are nice and I don't want to disappoint them. To cut the long story short, The Monroe's aren't my real family.

I lost my parents when I was twelve years old. It was a car accident. The day of the accident, I was in the car with my parents when it happened. When I opened my eyes, according to the doctors, they said I was out for like a month. So when I opened my eyes, I was told my parents didn't make it. Fucking hell, they died and I was alive.

Since then I was thrown from one foster home to another. Hell, it was shit. I suffered severe depression, technically, I'm still depressed, so. After getting into my fifth foster home because every other foster home didn't want to keep me for long, I got involved with the wrong crowd and I would sneak out at night in my New foster home to get high and wasted. I was only fifteen. I got involved with drugs and it was just easier to numb the pain and forget I was hurting when I was high. It was fucking easy. I became addicted, I couldn't stop. Fuck, I tried, and stopping was just worse. It felt like the pain just increased. I couldn't. For a long time I was lonely. I think I'm still lonely.

At fifteen I had my first tattoo. It was the mythical and legendary bird Phoenix. The symbol of my name. The bird was a symbol of resurrection, and some day, one day, I knew all this pain and hurt was gonna end and I may get my own salvation. I had the tattoo on my back, and the bird took almost every part of my upper back. I was young and I guess to some people it was a bad decision, but it wasn't for me. I loved it and I wanted it. Also, I could easily cover it with a shirt on so my foster parents didn't have to know.

My foster parents kicked me out when they found out I was a junkie. That was when the Monroe's took me in. They adopted me. They cared for me, truly cared for me and I felt different. They were rich, had good jobs, and an only child, Anna. Anna took me like her own brother, we were a family. I cared about them also.

Well, I tried to hide the fact that I was a druggie by sneaking out to get high. Sometimes I'd wait till they were asleep to just do it. They couldn't find out. They'd be ashamed of me. They hated drugs and they've even brought Anna and I up in the fear of God. Condemning drugs and even sex. I've tried to follow God and all his teachings, but I guess I'm a lost cause. All the changes aren't really working on me. I think I'm long gone down the road and there isn't any way back for me.

The Monroe's weren't all that proud of the tattoo on my back and the few ones on my arms, but they accepted it. They loved me, and they always hoped I would turn out better and push all my bad habits behind me.

But who was I kidding?

Before we moved to this town, I told myself I was gonna do better. Cut down on the partying, and drugs, definitely not sex, but that didn't happen. Because just a few days after we settled in, I got acquainted with new people. They were all in college and some of them were older than me. Jordan, the oldest of my new group, wanted to throw a party and I was invited. I never turned down parties, especially with free drinks on the platter.

Hell no.

I lied to my parents, the Monroe's, that I was hanging out with new friends and then left to get wasted. I sneaked back in around 1:am in the night, but Esther Monroe, my mother, saw me. I hated the look she gave me. That of disapproval. I told her I was just having fun and time slipped past me. She didn't say a word, just watched me with her arms crossed over her chest. I knew that look. It was a look every parent gave their kids when they were disappointed.

I couldn't sleep when I got home. I needed to get high in order for me to sleep. A few needles and I was out.

With me still seated on the floor with my back pressed against my bedroom door, I stare at the new syringe marks on my forearm. The old ones have healed quite a long time ago when I stopped using needles and opted for oral. Well, when my parents told us they were moving to this small town because Pete Monroe was pursuing a career in politics, and Esther got a job here, I parked a few emergency drugs, telling myself I won't be needing them.

I guess I lied. Because the minute I got into my bedroom at 1:am that night after partying with my new college friends, I pulled them all out, including needles I thought I wouldn't be using anytime soon and got high. Now, I feel like shit. My head hurts from the alcohol I consumed at the party and the drugs still kicking in.

I stagger to my feet, picking up my phone that won't stop buzzing with text messages. I unlock the screen and frown at the countless messages from my new college friends. About two messages are from Eunice, this pretty girl that I fucked last night. She probably thinks we're automatically in a relationship because she had my dick in her cunt. Hell, I don't even have her number, and I don't even remember her name if she hadn't added her name along her text messages.

I groan and toss my phone on the bed as I begin to gather my stash. Boxing everything and hiding them away at the top of my closet. I always lock my room and I'm always careful. I can't afford getting caught by my adoptive parents. They've been good to me and I don't want to fail them.

" Phoenix! Are you getting out?"

" I'm coming, Anne. And leave me the fuck alone." I groan.

God I hate school. I've been tempted to quit along the way, but the Monroe's always make sure I don't give up on myself. I think I've given up on myself a long time ago. I'm just doing all of this because I want to be the son they're proud of. So, I must go to school.

Taking a quick shower, I get dressed in a denim slightly ripped jacket, over a dark grey shirt and black jeans. I open my drawers and take out a bottle of Tylenol as I swallow dry. I risk a glance at my reflection, and fuck, I really do look like shit. My Amber eyes are a little more golden this morning, my eyes are a little red, and my eyelids are swollen, and damn, like every other day, I almost forgot to brush my golden brown hair.

Fuck this shit.

Putting on my sneakers, I glance around my room for anything that will make my parents be ashamed of me as I grab my backpack and scurry out of my room, making sure to lock it behind me.

" Hey, Phoenix." Mom calls in the kitchen. She's preparing breakfast.

" Hey, Mom." I greet her, grabbing one of Anna's peanut butter sandwiches as I chew on it.

" Get yours, asshole." Anna glares at me.

I give her a small smile.

" You don't look good, sweetheart." Mom says, running her hands through my hair. I tilt my head to the side, avoiding her sweet gestures.

" Yeah."

" Great party last night?" Mom asks, giving me one of her looks.

" I... uh."

" It's fine. Just don't get used to it. You're no longer a kid, I just want you to be careful."

" Right."

" Don't you think it's too hot for jackets?" Mom asks.

I bite my lip as I swallow the sandwich.

" I'm fine, thanks." I smile at my mom as I grab a bottle of water from the fridge.

" Sure. Be Careful out there and try to look out for your sister." Mom says. It took me almost two years before I got comfortable calling her mom. I've always called her by her name.

" I'm leaving, Anna. You better follow me or I'm leaving you behind." I say as I walk towards the foyer.

" Asshole." I hear Anna mutters.

" Language!" Mom scolds.

I chuckle as I step out of the house.

" Hey, Dad." I greet Pete Monroe once I spot him outside our lawn. He's talking with our neighbors. I don't even know their names.

" Hey, son. Going to school?" He asks. The olderly neighbor looks at me. I don't bother to acknowledge him.

" Yeah."

" Be Careful out there."

" Sure." I give him a small smile and slide inside my car.

The Monroe's gifted me this car, a black SUV Jeep Wrangler, the second I turned 17, which was two years ago. I valued this beautiful baby. It was a big gift for me, and then, I was yet to even call them mom and dad.

Anna quickly slides in my car as she sits herself in the passenger's seat. Without letting her fasten her seatbelt, I drive onto the road, smirking at Anna's squeals and curses.

" We really need to wash your tongue." I say when she's finally fastened her seatbelt. " Don't you think?"

" You drive like a maniac."

" Hm mm."

Anna pulls out a lipstick as she applies it on her lips. I watch her, as she leans towards me a little to stare at the rearview mirror.

" What's with the lipstick?"

" I need to make a good impression. High school students can be snobby, pieces of shits."

" Hmm. Or you're planning on catching the attention of a new guy? Unlucky son of a bitch."

" Hey! You've been having all the fun. I saw you sneak in this morning clearly drunk out of your ass. You obviously went to a party." Anna says, throwing her lipstick back in her bag." I've never really partied." She adds with a sigh, running her hands through her red hair.

Anna is beautiful. Green eyes, red hair. She's short, maybe not that short for a 16 years old. She's just like her mom, but Anna is more petite. Puberty obviously did her good in the female areas. The minute you look at both of us, you'd just know we aren't related. I have dark brown hair that's shaved at the sides and the back, making the middle a little long and curly. I have amber eyes, rare, I know. But, I think it's one of my charms. Girls love it. They just seem to flirt with me the minute I lock eyes with them.

Fucking crazy.

Anna and I might not be blood related, but I really care about the kid. I'd even beat up her past boyfriends because they hurt her. She is just too sweet.

" New school here we come." Anna mutters when I park my car outside.

We are late, I can tell with the quietness and lack of students outside. The minute we step inside the hallways, I walk Anna to her first class because she is shy and scared to get lost before I look for my own class. It is English and I am fucking late. Without bothering to knock, I push the door open and step in.

A woman is giving lectures in front of different students that I don't bother to look at. She stops teaching as she turns to look at me. Including the students. I don't say a word, eyeing the teacher and taking in every detail of her.

New school sucks. In fact, highschool sucks. I've never liked it. And when you're new, and maybe good looking, it's just fucking crazy the way girls stare at you. I scan my eyes across the room, with girls already biting their lips and giving me cat eyes.

Fuck.

My eyes fall on a boy sitting on the front row, and for a long minute our eyes lock. Curly brown hair, blue eyes. God, he looks fragile and young. You can easily pass him up for a 16 years old. Oddly enough, something pulled me to him. Something I don't recognize as I stare into his eyes.

I guess the minute our eyes locked, I have a feeling I'm fucked.