Chapter 4 Trois

I had a crying child in my arms and she refused to stop or let go. The neck of my black blouse was wet with her tears and it took so much from me to not sit on the floor with her in my arms and bawl my eyes out too because I definitely don't want to go without her. My boss informed me over the phone yesterday night that there was a meeting he had to attend and forgot to inform me about it but that as his secretary/PA, I should be there and we were to leave Sunday evening and return Tuesday morning, hence my current predicament. Amari didn't want me to go without her.

"Baby I'll talk to you over the phone. I will be back as soon as possible."

She shook her head as big balls of tears left her eyes and slid down her face. "Don't leave me."

"You know I don't want to but I have to work. Two days. I'll be back before you know it." I replied as I wiped her face with my hanky and a little frown. If I didn't know better, I would have thought she was having separation anxiety.

I dropped my handbag on the floor and picked her up. My mum had given up on trying to take her away. I didn't like it when Amari cried and because I knew that on a normal day, she wasn't a crier, it was disturbing seeing her cry like this.

"Amari is something wrong?" I asked softly as my eyes flicked to the wall clock directly above the TV. 30 minutes to go. I made my way to my bedroom and waited for her to talk.

"Bonnie." she said and I laid down with her on my chest as I looked up at the ceiling.

"What happened to Bonnie?" Bonnie was one of her friends from school.

"Bonnie said her mummy went out to buy candy for her but she didn't come back."

"When did she say this?"

"Yesterday when Miss Fiona told us to make a wish. I don't want you to go."

I hugged her tightly and kissed her head. I love the fact that she is a very intelligent child but sometimes, the things she said and thought about scared me. Sometimes her questions caught me unawares and in as much as I answer them to my best abilities, I don't always want to. Her mind went farther than I expected a 5 year old's mind to go because why would she think I'd leave her behind?

"I promise it won't be like that. I will call you every hour to say hi. We will talk via video calls. You'd get to see my face and I'll get to see yours and blow you kisses. And when I get back, we will go out for ice cream and pizza and we will do anything you want us to alright?"

"Pinky promise?" she asked with a sniffle as she stuck out her pinky and I entwined my pinky with hers. "Pinky promise baby. You know I love you too much to just leave and not come back." she nodded and sniffled again and I checked my watch. 15 minutes to go.

"I have to go. I'll call before I leave and when I get there alright?" she nodded again with her thumb in her mouth. I sighed. I didn't like that she wasn't being as vocal as usual. I left the room with her in my arms and then gave her to her grandma. She did give me a sloppy kiss on the cheek which I returned and waved before grabbing my bag and my small suitcase and waved goodbye before finally closing the door behind me.

The only thing that gave me the balls to stay that late was the fact that my boss sent a taxi to pick me up because it's my fault you didn't have a prior knowledge. I was supposed to have a prior knowledge. I was his secretary for crying out loud. It spelt misconduct on my part.

Luckily the roads weren't busy, so I got to the airport on time. I spotted him sitting and waiting for me while flipping through a magazine. He looked so good I wanted to weep. Over time I came to realize that he wore royal blue suits more than any other color but today, the jacket and tie were missing and the top buttons were unbuttoned. He looked as normal as the other people around him. I liked the fact that he had all that money but didn't show off or expect any sort of special treatment. While working for him, I had the opportunity to meet people like him and people completely different.

I like the fact that silently rich people actually exist not just the ones that expect you to get on the ground and be their carpet just because they're rich and influential or popular and you're just a secretary. Like Lucy, Jeniffer, Brielle, Anthony, Lucian, Michelle, Sandra, Mira, and the rest of the gang, my mind supplied and I nodded. Those were a few of the list of nasty people I met within the 4 years I began working for him.

"Good morning Sir. I'm sorry for not showing up on time. I should have been here before you. I'm sorry."

"It's fine." he replied and I nodded and took a seat behind him while he turned to another page. He was obviously in a bad mood. Knowing fully well that I couldn't make calls in the plane, I plugged in my earphones and facetimed my mum. Next, the screen of my phone was covered with my daughter's face and I chuckled lightly when she flared her nose.

"Mummy!!"

"Hi baby. I miss you so much already."

I heard my mum tell her by the side say I miss you too and she said that and I looked at my boss. His back looked tight with tension. I hope it's nothing serious.

"Mummy I want cake." She didn't say she missed me too.

"We will buy the biggest cake when I get back." My mum in the background said you spoil her too much. I've been saying that. I knew I spoiled her to my capabilities. It wasn't that bad but I was also a sucker for cake and pizza.

"And pizza."

"And pizza." I reaffirmed. My boss stood and picked up his bag and I pulled out one ear of my earphones to hear what he wanted to say. He told me it was time for check-in and I said okay and picked up my bag and followed him. It was when he handed my boarding pass over to me that it occurred to me that I was supposed to have booked flights but it had skipped my mind completely. Shit! When did I become this tardy? Yana this is the best paying job you've ever gotten in your life and this is how you want to mess it up? What the fuck is wrong with you?!

A voice whispered You're still a useless dumb fuck at the end of the day. Stupid ignorant... My daughter's voice cut through that haze of mockery.

"Mummy?!"

"Sorry sweetie. I have to go now. I'll call you when I get there. Bye."

"I love you! She shouted from her end and I kissed my phone quickly. "I love you too my darling. Be good." I said and she nodded and kissed the screen too and I disconnected and put the phone in my handbag and then looked at the boarding pass I just collected minutes ago and my eyes widened. First Class. Shit! Wait. If he booked first class tickets, why was he in the terminal?

Leo's POV

I let out a sigh as I climbed into bed and put on the eye mask with the hope that blocking out the light would help me sleep since I didn't sleep the night before. Lack of sleep made me snappy and irritable. Insomnia usually hit me on those nights when my feeling of loneliness was at its peak.

Loneliness is a feeling I'm very well accustomed to and that had been my main reason for getting Bubbles in the first place. I have friends and family but when you really think about it, you'd realize that they can only go so far. There are things you can't do or share with them. They're not the ones you sleep with at night. They're not the ones you rant to when you want to rant about how the day went.

Hearing Iyana speak to her baby left a bad taste in my mouth. Jealousy is a bad emotion. It makes you ask a lot of silly questions. Questions like Why does everyone have someone and I don't? Why does Keith have Danica and I have no one? Why does Sammy have someone and I have no one? Why does Iyana have someone and I have no one? Why does my mother have someone and me, her son has not had anyone since I was 23? This is how you'll end up dying alone Leo. Wait. No. You won't die alone. You'll be surrounded by family and friends and their someones. Amazing.

I hate hearing my thoughts. Sometimes they get so dark that they make me want to bash my head against the wall. The reason why I liked Danica at first was because of her body image issues. It wasn't that I liked that she had those issues but more of the fact that I found a kindred spirit in her. She had spent years of her life dealing with what people had to say about her body. Her whole life dealing with comments of such nature. She had insecurities. She wasn't perfect by the world's standards. She cooks so well, she's a good friend, she's sweet and so many things even though she was a pushover. She was married to someone that is perfect by society's standards when looks are involved, and in as much as I love Keith I can say that he was a fool and had at first been a grade A asshole to her. I admired her for staying that long with him because if I had been the one, nothing will ever make me stay with someone that doesn't care for me. So this woman I want is with someone else. They have kids together. So why the hell wasn't I getting over it as fast as I wanted or expected to?

I sighed and waited and hoped sleep would take me.

Iyana's POV

I sleepily fumbled with my phone for 10 solid seconds before I finally managed to turn off the alarm. I slipped back into sleep again only for the second alarm to ring too. I turned off 5 more alarms within 30 minutes before I finally stood up.

I knew myself well enough to know that I really needed to set up to 7 alarms a day to leave the bed in the morning.

First thing I did was call my mum to talk to her and my daughter and then I got ready for the day and sat down and waited for my boss to come out. An hour later he was still not out and I began wondering what was going on. I considered going to knock on his door. We were staying in a suite, so I was in one room while he was in the other. Because I stayed awake preparing the things he told me to for the meeting, I knew when he stopped moving around in his room and I figured he should be awake by now.

I put the laptop to the side and went to knock on his door. I knocked and waited for him to open the door. When he didn't, I knocked again and called out but no response.

My imagination began running wild. What if he was hurt or so sick he couldn't move or unconscious? What if he was dead? That made me open the door which was thankfully not locked. I rushed in and without thinking, I ripped the mountain of duvet he was buried beneath off him and he groaned and moved a little. I put my finger close to his nose in order to convince myself that he was really breathing and I wasn't just imagining the groan. I let out a breath when I felt the rush of air from his nose hit my finger. I took deep breaths to calm myself. I unfortunately had a way and talent of imagining the worst case scenario and it was terrible. I looked at the bottle of medicine on the bedside drawer next to a bottle of water. Sleeping pills. No wonder he wasn't waking up as I expected. It's sad to know that people have issues with sleeping. I sighed and moved to pull the duvet back from the foot of the bed but paused to really look at him. His mouth was slightly open in that adorable way and some strands of hair got into his hair. He did need a haircut. His lips looked really soft. My eyes traveled down his body. My eyes widened when they traveled down to his waist.

"Fucking hell! Shit!" I whispered when my eyes caught the size of the tent in his pants. "Oh my God." I whispered. "The fuck is he packing in there?" I asked myself before I realised what I was doing. I was ogling a sleeping man in a sexual manner. What the actual fuck? You creep. You were supposed to let him sleep for 30 minutes more not stay back and look at him. Now that you've seen the dick print what will you do? Get down on your knees and kiss him awake?

I quickly covered him with the duvet and left the room feeling shell-shocked.

Shit. Shit. Shitty Shit! Let's see how you'll sleep at night with that image in your head Yana.