Chapter 3 A Dream

A dream. What happened last night was only a dream. Because I woke up this morning that I am already lying in my bed alone, here in with my shared room with my sister. So, I'm certain of my guess, or was I really?

But, nevertheless, I don't have the time to rethink about it, for I have so many responsibilities here at our home. But, why do I feel like I am wishing for it to be true? That the odd creature I met last night, must be true?

I shook my head to erase my thoughts about it. Just then, my mother barged from the front door, angry and walking directly at me, looking ready to eat me alive. How can she has so much energy left to scold me even though she's noticeably tired from her work?

"Why didn't you cleaned the house again, Savana?" She shouted at my face, not even bothering to look around and check if I didn't really cleaned the house like what she's abruptly accusing me. "I am already tired and you're assuming that I will also do the chores here? For god's sake!"

I looked at her with tired eyes. Tired because that's the first time I have taken a sit after washing so many of our clothes, bedsheets and curtains a while ago. "I already cleaned the whole house, mom. Why can't you ask me first before shouting at me like that?" My voice is dripping with so much bitterness and sarcasm.

It is just so irritating to get treated like this by my own mother just because she thinks, I am worthless for not having a job like her. Especially when she and my father made me finish my studies in college. But, it's not like I also like not having a work up until now. In addition to that, the whole world is facing a big pandemic right now because of a deadly virus that's killing people by damaging their immune systems. That's why, it's one of the reasons why it's just so hard for me to finally land a position in every company out there. Not to mention, I still don't have any working experiences to show off to the oh so choosy employers.

"You're talking back at me again! You're so disrespectful!" I am left astounded when she walked closer to my younger brother who is eating at the dining area that time, and then, she picks my brother's plate that's full of food and rushed back to me again only to throw the whole plate at my face.

Right at that moment, the shattered pieces of myself was shattered again and again like the other nights where my mother did the same thing like what she did to me right now. I know she's tired, I know she's stressed because of our pending bills, the due rent of our apartment and many more, but is it really necessary to vent out all of what she's feeling to me? And, in this way?

I felt the sticky feel of the rice and viand my brother was eating in my face down to my neck and blouse. My mind said to shout at my mother, too. To do to her what she did to me, too. But, my body didn't cooperated. I just looked at my mom with tired eyes again and began cleaning the mess she had made on our couch and in the floor.

After that, I slowly walked back to my shared room with Hailee, walked inside the bathroom but not to clean myself, but to sit on the farthest corner there and cry my heart out. Quietly and alone.

I took a bath afterwards and headed out to the dining area to eat my dinner like nothing so devastating happened to me a while ago.

"Feed the dogs, Sav." I am halfway into finishing my food when my younger brother suddenly appeared beside me while his eyes are both fixated on his phone because he's busy playing mobile games in there. This rude jerk. I didn't answered him because well, I am still finishing my food and my mouth is still busy chewing. In addition to that, I just don't simply want to answer him and comply to what was he's commanding me.

But, because he's a hot-headed jerk brother of mine, he easily got upset because of that. "Hey! I said you feed the dogs. They are surely starving now!" He shouted at me and he also have the guts to push my back so hard. I tried to ignore the pain that struck me and still continued eating. I don't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing me in pain.

"What the hell is wrong with you two, again!" That's the time mom went out of her room and spotted us in that heated situation. I took a glanced at her and saw her already wearing her pajamas, fresh from the bath, and obviously so ready to go to sleep.

"This stupid girl. Acting crazy again." My younger brother, as expected, pointed the blame immediately at me. "She doesn't want to feed the dogs, mom. How stupid of her!"

That's the time I speak up because I couldn't take my boiling anger any moment from now.

"Can't you just freaking wait? Can't you see I'm still eating here? If you really want to feed them right now, why can't you do it yourself? It's just the only thing you can do in this house and yet, you always pass that freaking task to me!" My younger brother became so mad at that he took the initiative to punch my face but mom stopped her at the right moment.

"Justine!" I stared at my younger brother with so much hatred in my eyes. This is not the first time he tried to hit me. There were also a couple of times he succeeded on doing that, I remember going to school back then with violet spots and bruises on my cheek and arm.

"I am the only one who is allowed to hurt your sister. Not you, and not anybody else!" My mom shouted, not caring if what she meant by that will destroy the remaining sanity in me. I stared at her with so much disbelief.

Is she really my mom? Why is she like that, then? What she had just said hurts so freaking much!

And my younger brother, why does he always resort to physically hurting me whenever he had the opportunity to do so? Why? Is it because he's a man, and a man is supposedly much stronger than a woman? And, that became his license to just punch me whenever he wants? Because I am a girl and I am weak at his eyes? Is that it?

My younger brother pushed me one last time before storming out of our dining area after mom scolded him. Then, my mom looked at me with scorching blazing eyes.

"Look at the mess you always do at this house. For God's sake, Savana! I am tired! I am tired for all this drama! I am tired for all of our problems and here you are, adding and piling up to my problems!" I looked away from her and tried to drink some water on my glass to stop my upcoming tears from falling down.

"It's a good thing Hailee has a job, even though she only finished senior highschool. But you? I don't even want to talk about it!"

I closed my eyes as I heard her footsteps coming out from the dining area as well after carelessly saying those shits at me.

I stared at nowhere after that. I already lost my appetite that's why I had decided to just made some food for our dogs, finally. My face is void of any emotion but when I went outside our house and walked towards where Chammy and Chuchay were, my tears suddenly falls freely from my eyes.

Chammy and Chuchay happily wagged their tails upon seeing me, and that made my mood a little bit lighter. I watched them as they cheerfully dug in to their foods while I am silently hurting and crying in front of them.