Chapter 3 Aunt Hannah

Everything hurt. I was sitting for way too long now. This was the last bus I had to take before I will find my aunt's house. My body wasn't made for sitting for over six hours. I always was a active child, I could never sit still. That was why my father took me to gymnastics class. To loose some energy he said. I hate sitting. It hurts. But what hurts the most is my heart. How could my mother betray me like this? Why didn't she love me? I stare out of the window, watching the streets of Tucson go by. I never liked it here. I have only the few memories of my aunt.

I had to stay inside of the house the last time. I wasn't allowed to leave. For that reason only, I hate everything about Tucson. I closed my eyes. I closed them for way too long, because I fell asleep.

'Miss. Miss.' some lady voice is calling me, but my eyes stay closed. 'Miss, we are on the end of this bus ride, you have to leave now.'

My eyes open instantly and find a elder lady with gray hair and a uniform standing next to me, she was the bus driver. 'I'm sorry.' I say to her. I stretch my muscles and grab my bag.

'Miss, is everything okay? Do you need any help?' She looked worried. Why wouldn't she be? I'm a fifteen year old teenager, alone and sleeping on a bus.

'No, I'm fine, thank you. Just going to visit my aunt for a few days. Everything will be alright. Have a nice day.' I wave with a fake smile and walk out of the bus. I have no idea where I am. This doesn't look anything like I remembered. When I open my phone to use Google maps, I see my phone only has 17% battery left. I curse out loud. I have no idea when I could charge it at some point. I need my phone for navigation. I sit down on a bench. It was 7:11 pm. Damn it, that means I was way further from my aunt's house than I was supposed to be. The map on my phone confirmed me that I was almost twenty-seven minutes away from her. When my stomach growled, I grabbed my bag to search for the muesli bars and cans of coke I got from Elly. I found a can and took it, but I couldn't find the muesli bars. As I threw out a sweater and a small bag with a toothbrush and toothpaste in it, my hand scrapes against a piece of paper. With curiosity I take it out of the bag. It's an envelope with my name on it and I recognized my mother's handwriting. With tears in my eyes, I put it back. I can't deal with this shit right now. I ate the muesli bars and drank the can of coke. I couldn't stop thinking about the envelope though. What would she write? Was she going to explain why she kicked me out? No, I say to myself. Your mother stopped caring about you almost six years ago. Stop trying to find her approval. You're on your own now. I started to walk. I needed to find my aunt's house before it's dark.

On my way to her house I came across a Starbucks. I felt so sleepy, but I had to stay awake. I bought a iced caramel latte and went further on my journey. I couldn't stop thinking about how screwed up my life is right now. So much has happened the last two days. I found out I was pregnant. Not only that, but almost four months without even noticing it. The doctor told me, because I was so young, my body only registered it now. That was why I felt so sick all of the sudden. I was kicked out of the house. My mother and stepdad didn't care about me at all or the baby. I made a new friend, I left my new friend. I left Phoenix, the place I was born and raised in. It was all too much for me. I don't cry about it, because I'm done feeling sorry for myself. For now at least as I feel my eyes filling up with tears. Stupid, stupid hormones.

When I come closer to my destination I feel nervous. This is the street I remember. The last time I saw aunt Hannah was almost seven months ago, when she came for my fifteenth birthday. She gave me a red leather wallet, which my mom thankfully packed for me. Elly didn't have to lent me money, but I was too afraid to say I had my credit card with me, so I took it anyway. It was all in my awesome wallet right now.

My aunt looked a lot like my mother, blond curly hair, big blue eyes and all the right curves. Some would even say they were twins, but my aunt was almost five years younger than my mom. I had the same curls, but I on the other hand, looked more like my father. The chocolate brown eyes, dark brown hair and I had a darker skin tone than my mom. My father was Italian and my mom just an American. I was also taller and thinner than my mother, which she didn't like about me. She didn't like to see me like I was all grown up. She will always see me as a little girl that can't take care of herself. Well, maybe when I was still nine, but since dad died I cooked my own dinners, washed my own clothes and sheets, I basically raised myself.

After almost eight hours since I left Elly's home, I finally stand in front of my aunts house. I didn't know aunt Hannah's phone number, so my plan was to go to her house and knock on her door. Hopefully she was nice enough to take me in. Finding the courage to knock on the door, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

'She is your only family.' I say out loud. 'She will take care for you.'

Knock, knock.

A minute past by, but no one answered. I knocked another three times and rang the bell, I found hanging to my right, next to the door. I nearly gave up and walked away, when a large man with a red hair and a red beard opened the door. I had never seen him before.

'Who are you?' he asked with a low growly voice. In the sweats he was wearing, he seemed a little out of place in this beautiful house.

'I'm Maya. I'm looking for my aunt Hannah.'

The man shook his head. 'I don't know her. You have the wrong house.' He was closing the door when I stopped it with both of my hands.

'Can you please tell me where she went? I know she lived here and she never told me she moved.' I push open the door some further. Now I have his attention.

'When did she live here?' The man raised his bushy red eyebrows at me. 'I have lived here for the last ten years and my wife's name isn't Hannah, her name is Caroline. Now go little girl. I think you got the wrong house.'

I didn't let go of the door. 'No. She lived here, I'm really sure about. It was five years ago, when I last came here. But I remember staring outside of those big windows for five days. I was hugging the blue curtains, because they felt nice and soft.' The man was looking at me like I was crazy. Tears are filling up my eyes, making me see blurry. 'I stayed here for three weeks with her, five years ago. She moved here a few years before that. '

'What did you say?' he asked.

'I said s..' but he cut me off.

'You said something about hugging the curtains?'

'Y-yes.' His eyes changed from annoyed to anger. Something is wrong. He remembers me or there is something going on inside this house. I can't put my finger on it, but he kind of give me the creeps. I feel a chill all over my body, making me shiver. 'Leave.' he shouts to me. 'Don't ever come back.' With a loud bang, he closed the door in front of my face. I let my tears go free. I was so sure my aunt lived here. I remember the blue sofa I used to jump on when I was six. I remember the large tree in the garden with the swing on it when I was eight. The windows upstairs had the same blue curtains, like I remembered when I was ten. The man said he lived there for ten years. It was like ten years when my aunt came to live here and I first came here to visit her. What the hell was going on? Did she even live here or was it all a lie? Who was the man?

I stare to the front door for a few more seconds, then I turn around and ran. I run to the unknown. I should never have come here.