Chapter 5 March 20th

Four and a half painstaking hours later, the meeting is winding down as we all restlessly shift around and stretch out. Half of us are yawning profusely while trying to stay awake, and the other half are shuffling our feet back and forth, aimlessly glancing around the room or completely zoning out. I definitely fall in the zoning-the-fuck-out category as I can honestly say that I've only retained about 5% of what Zander has said;

There is werewolf activity in the area and we all need to be careful. Boom, the only useful bit of information he's shared with us. He could have easily sent us all a group chat or chain email to get that point across, but apparently that is too much to ask.

"Okay everyone, that should about wrap it up for now. Please get home safe, make sure to stay in contact with one another over the coming months," he reminds everyone. "Let me know if you notice anything suspicious. Keep in mind that the next quarterly meeting will be a little late and it'll be an all day affair as Raven completes the ascension process to take over as your new Alpha!" Everyone begins to disperse, either splitting off into groups to catch up with one another or heading out the door to go home. I let out an exasperated sigh as I turn to face Tessa who has an equal look of boredom on her face.

We make a quick escape into the side yard that we initially arrived in and I trot through the doorway in the fading sunlight. As we skirt past a group of people our age congregated on the pavers just outside the doors, a sound similar to nails on a chalkboard grates against my eardrums.

"...just can't believe it! It took so long, but I finally found my Aequilavii! God, he's so perfect and attractive and..." Tessa narrows her eyes at the back of Erica's fiery red head, silently willing her to implode. Erica has earned herself the title of 'cluster bitch' since I've had the displeasure of knowing her. She's got a bad habit of endlessly gloating and bragging about herself. Apparently she's been self-absorbed and vain since she was a child and retained all of those qualities into adulthood, although I don't recall her former being. Her red lacy heels and short black dress are entirely too formal for this occasion, but the amount of attention she receives by showing off her assets is enough for her vapid self to ignore the casual dress code.

At the sound of Erica saying the word 'Aequilavii', a switch flips in Tessa's mind and she power walks into the grass with a purpose. I jog after her with a sigh, hoping that she doesn't have a breakdown right now. As I slowly approach and stand a few feet from her body, she whips back around to face me with tears brimming in her eyes, her breath coming out in short spurts.

"Why, Raven? Why can she find her Aequilavii but I can't?" she demands as a single tear rolls down her cheek while jabbing her finger in the direction of the house. I shake my head and reluctantly shrug.

"I don't know Tess...it just hasn't happened for you yet," I reassure her in a soothing voice. She scoffs at my response and swallows back her emotions.

"Yeah, or maybe I won't at all," she snaps before lacing her fingers through her blonde hair and closing her eyes. For a moment, I don't say a word as I stare at her with a sinking sadness in my heart. I knew that as soon as Erica said the word Aequilavii, all hell was going to break lose and Tessa would lose her shit. This is a sensitive topic for her, and it never goes well whenever someone we know finds theirs.

Similar to werewolf 'mates', shapeshifters have an Aequilavii, which translates out to 'half of a whole' in Latin. So, we have the luxury of knowing that someway, somehow, at some point in our lives, we could find our soulmate.

Werewolves can find their mate after the age of twenty one and they can do so by scent alone. Once they've located one another, things move pretty quickly and they mark each other through a bite. They do this to solidify their bond through blood exchange, and to show others they have been claimed; that they're no longer available to anyone else. They also do this to establish a mind-link connection together if they didn't previously share a pack connection. I've heard it all happens rapidly, as it becomes increasingly harder for them to sedate that animalistic instinct. They are both completely engulfed by the others presence and the longer they exist unsolidified, the more painful it becomes. They start to lose control over their anger and primal urges, and marking could end up happening unannounced.

Shapeshifters, however, do not mark one another. The bond to our Aequalivii happens solely through sex, nothing else. We also can't mind link with anyone in our cluster or our Aequilavii. Once shifters turn twenty one years old, we can also locate our other half, but it's a little more complex. Shifter men track their counterpart through scent, whereas shifter women cannot. So, men are usually the instigator when it comes to the initial connection. Unfortunately, shifter women don't have that luxury. By some shitty form of divine intervention, women were given the ability to find our Aequilavii, but only through blatant sexual contact. The tiny saving grace we females have without getting physical is that we will find our Aequalivii to be attractive and feel somewhat drawn to them.

When you think about it, that doesn't say much since there are millions of good looking people on the planet who you can want to sleep with, Aequalivii or not. So naturally, most shapeshifting women are pretty loosey-goosey when it comes to the bedroom and men use this to their advantage. If a man pulls the baby, you are my Aequilavii card, nine out of ten shifter girls will immediately jump into the sack. They want to know for sure. They don't want to wait for a man to court them, they just don't want to waste any valuable time sleeping with the wrong people. Morally sound or not, this is the way of our world.

Theoretically, this all sounds pretty great, right? There's someone out there that is made for us and eventually we'll find them. Game over.

In a way it is, but the biggest problem is that he or she might not even be residing in the same country as you. They could literally be anywhere on the face of the planet in any other cluster. The chances of finding them becomes slim based on the geographical obstacle alone. Most shapeshifters want to find that someone, though. They'll travel the world chasing down someone with no name or face yet. They want to have a moment where they can say holy shit, this is my soulmate as they ride off into the sunset together to live happily ever after. Tessa especially wants this. One of her biggest desires is to find her other half. When she's gone four years without any luck and others are successful, she can't help but feel bitter about her own loneliness.

Myself, on the other hand? I've got no desire what-so-ever to have any man touch me.

Ever since I woke up from my coma and basically started my life all over again, I've had a serious aversion to physical contact. I can't tell you why because I don't remember my former life. All that I do know is if any guy gets too close or tries to touch me, I go into full-on panic mode. Even when a woman touches me, it makes me feel slightly uncomfortable. Tessa is really the only one whose touch doesn't bother me since I trust her on a level that I don't trust anyone else on.

"Tess, come on...it's Erica," I attempt to reason with her. "I mean think about how much of a miserable guy he probably is to be bound to her selfish ass for life. Even if he's not already miserable, he will be with her." This comment elicits a slight chuckle out of her and she softens up a bit.

"Yeah, I'm sure the two of them deserve each other," she giggles slightly. She drops her hands from her head, allowing them to swing back and forth. I walk over and pull her into a tight embrace, sighing with relief as she calms down.

"Don't worry about this, okay? You're amazing and I'm absolutely positive that your Aequilavii is out there somewhere just waiting to meet you," I reassure her. She suddenly pushes herself back from me and her eyes light up with excitement. I inwardly groan.

Damnit, I can already tell where this is going.

"Let's go out tonight Rae," she begs, grabbing onto my hands.

"Do we really have to, Tess? You know I'm going to be miserable sitting at the bar drinking water all night," I complain. She knows how much I hate crowds, going out and she knows that I really don't drink. But, she is also aware that I will easily cave in to her demands since I like seeing her happy. Going out, getting drunk and hooking up with some random guy or girl is the one way that she copes with her feelings of isolation and who am I to deny her that simple pleasure.

She flashes me theses horribly sad puppy dog eyes that I won't ever say no to and I chew on my inner cheek. I'm too much of a pushover when it comes to her and I can't stand to crush her spirits. I release her hands and sigh, quickly succumbing to my fate and admitting defeat.

"Fine. I'll go out, but only to Dixons since their bar isn't usually crowded. It's also already in the area and just on the outskirts of our territory so it should be safe," I counter. Tessa jumps up and down like an excited little school girl, clapping her hands together.

"I love you Rae and I owe you one. I'm ordering an Uber as we speak," she beams before pulling her phone out of her pocket, tapping away with a purpose. I draw in a deep breath and try to stuff down the anticipation of the night's future events.

Me, crammed into a bar like a sardine in a can. Then, I've got to deal with every other humanoid sardine dangerously encroaching on the confines my aluminum personal space container. There will be a horde of inebriated strangers that I don't like, don't know and don't care to know sucking up all of my oxygen. Me, standing at the bar sipping on water while Tessa drinks copious amounts of alcohol and dances her ass off in search of a guy or girl to hook up with.

Sounds like everything I've always dreamed of.

•••

"I seriously love you for coming out tonight, thank you!" Tessa screams at me over the EDM music blaring through the sub woofers. We make our way from the entry towards the significantly less crowded bar, skirting past the crowd on the left.

The atmosphere within the thin metal walls of Dixons is the usual mixture of black lights, flashing lasers, drunks and the smell of weed wafting through the over-sized warehouse. I really hate going out to most places, but Dixons actually isn't so bad. It's situated at the edge of a neutral zone, so we've never had any conflict before. There is a smaller, dimly lit bar near the back left corner that usually only houses a handful of people since everyone else is mainly on the overstocked, light up dance floor. Tessa and I file over towards my favorite bar and she strips off her jacket, handing it to me for safe keeping. Thankfully, there's only one other girl over here and she's sitting at the opposite end of the bar, so I've got this space to myself temporarily. I prop my elbows against the polished bar top behind me and gaze outward at the sea of people dancing about twenty feet away from us. It's so loud in here that I can barely hear anything besides bass, but I'm not interested in talking to anyone as it is, so it doesn't bother me.

"Can I get a double vodka tonic with lime? And she will take a water!" Tessa shouts at the bartender who nods in response. Within a matter of seconds, he slides us our drinks and she hands him a $50 bill. She motions for him to keep the change and he gives her a thumbs up, turning back around to continue mixing cocktails for the other patrons on the dance floor.

"I'm gonna go dance! You'll be okay here, right?" Tess yells into my right ear.

"Yeah, I'm fine Tess. Go have fun," I answer while motioning towards the dance floor, giving her a reassuring smile. She bites her lip in excitement and runs out towards the crowd, inserting herself into the middle until I can no longer see her. I raise my eyebrows and sigh, bringing the glass of water up to my lips and taking a generous sip.

Whenever we go out together, this is usually how things pan out. I don't mind too much, though. Drunken people watching is sort of like a fun little hobby for me while at any bar. I've witnessed heated break-ups, couples screaming at one another, intense bar fights between men and women alike and sloppy seconds. It's all pretty entertaining to watch.

"So, water at a bar, huh?" A man's voice questions from my left hand side. I was so distracted by everyone else that I didn't even realize someone is now standing beside me. I turn to face the source of the voice and I'm immediately overwhelmed with a sense of discomfort. When my green eyes lock in place with his hazel ones, unease takes root in the pit of my stomach. He's tall with a shaved face, tanned skin and definitely more muscular than your average man. He's certainly cute, but something about him makes me wish I was alone in company. The negative energy flowing off his body has me wanting nothing more than to avoid his presence. I subtly nudge myself away from him little by little to put a bit more than three feet of space between us. I can't place my finger on it, but my body is telling me that I need get away from him as quickly as I can. I'm sure that won't be too hard if I just act like my usual, awkward self whenever I'm in the presence of anyone of the opposite sex.

"Well, if you're looking at things on a molecular scale, water is actually the more beneficial substance. It's easily absorbed by the body and isn't toxic," I begin to awkwardly prattle off. "I mean if you really think about it, water is the MVP of life. It sustains all living beings on this planet and we can't survive without it, so it has more intrinsic value than any alcoholic beverage ever would." I'm hoping my random chain of thoughts about water, the fact that I'm not drunk and lack of stimulating conversation will force him to look elsewhere for a hook up. But, instead of giving up and walking away, he leans against the bar top and stares at me in a highly quizzical fashion; like he recognizes me. My eyes nervously dart between his face and the crowd of people on the dance floor while I inwardly plan an escape method.

Well shit, that plan backfired horribly.

"How long has it been..." he mutters, leaning even closer to me. My body tenses up as he closes in. He's dangerously close to my personal space bubble, and I don't like it one bit. I also can't shake the feeling that this guy is hiding some big piece of information that he knows will make me panic. He doesn't smell like anything out of the ordinary, but he could easily be masking his scent so I stay calm.

He could be a werewolf.

"Uhh, I have to...go to the bathroom. Like, now," I manage to stutter out in a panic. My voice carries over the loud treble from the new song that just came on and I quickly turn away from him. I hustle over to the single stall bathroom at the very back of the club, testing the doorknob. Thankfully there's no one inside, so I throw open the door and step into the grimy white walls consisting of a toilet, sink and cracked mirror. I shut the door behind me and immediately pivot around to face the sink. I shakily turn the faucet on and place my hands under the cool water, letting out a sharp exhale. I dab the back of my neck with my dripping hands and close my eyes, trying to get the image of that guy possibly touching me out of my head. He was so close and forward with his intentions that I could practically feel the knives of anxiety and fear burrowing into my brain.

I also can't ignore the tugging in my gut that's telling me he isn't human. Maybe I'm just being overly cautious and everything I've concocted in my mind is a figment of my imagination, but I can't be certain that's the case. We're right at the border of my own territory, so wolves could be here.

I don't have the opportunity to think about anything else before I hear the bathroom door creak open. The thick, distinguishable smell of wolf overloads my senses as I gaze through the mirror to the door behind me. My stomach drops as an all too familiar frame steps into view. He turns around and locks the door behind him with a grin.

Shit...I hate it when I'm right.

I flip around and back myself up against the cold ivory porcelain of the sink. I fold my arms across my chest and try to look as confident as I can, but that's a feat on its own. I'm pretty much terrified right now.

Between locking the door and his mischievous grin, I seriously doubt that Zander's 'flight-not-fight' motto will help me out in this situation. I've never actually had to fight anyone, let alone a werewolf, but I'd better channel some dormant ferocity in order to make it out of this bathroom alive. Maybe Tessa will smell him over the pot and alcohol lingering in the air to help me out, but I can't bank on that.

"Looks like you are a mutt after all. I knew I should have trusted my instincts," I state in a flat, caustic tone. He huffs, amused by my words.

"Call me whatever you will, shifter. I don't care. I'm just disappointed you don't remember me," he snidely remarks. Every hair on my body stands on end and I swallow hard.

How does this guy know me...has he been watching me or something?

"Call me crazy, but you don't exactly have a memorable face," I lie. He takes a small step towards me, causing the blood in my veins to ignite with adrenaline.

"Even if you don't remember me, I do remember you," he sneers with a frigid tinge. "I knew I recognized those green eyes of yours. It's been a long time, mio tesoro." My heart rate skyrockets and I so badly wish I was anywhere but here right now. The way he's looking at me and those foreboding hazel eyes makes my skin crawl. In this moment, I don't think I've ever felt so uncomfortable in my life. He takes another step towards me and reaches out to touch my forearm, but I immediately withdraw from his reach. I back myself past the sink and to the wall as fast as I can even though it doesn't provide very much by way of relief. He flashes me another grin before speaking again.

"Don't worry, I like the ones who put up a fight the most." With those few words, my body prepares itself to go into fight mode where I'll need to shift in an instant. I know it's against Zander's main rule to confront a werewolf and that I've never actually fought one before, but I don't have a choice. Even though there is only one of him, werewolves are lethal; in their wolf forms and their human forms. I'm pretty quick when it comes to shifting and I can do it faster than anyone else I know, but I'm not sure that will be enough. Even coupled with the severe amount of adrenaline I've got coursing through my blood, I might not stand a chance.

But, I have to try.

I'll start with a large dog, like a Rottweiler. I know that I can get in some nasty bites as a hundred and fifteen pound animal. If I'm seen, people will definitely wonder what in the hell a dog is doing in the club, but that's an easy enough situation to get out of. If I can make it past him in the confines of this bathroom, I have a chance to get out of here completely undetected.

Or, Plan B. Maybe I could -

Before I can finish my thought, the scent of another wolf seeps underneath the bathroom door. Apparently, this guy notices too because his focus shifts from me and back to the door. The difference between the wolf outside of the bathroom and him is that the unknown party has a much darker, stronger and nerve-racking scent than this dimwit. His smell exudes nothing but authority, making me even more agitated than I already am.

My breath hitches when I realize that I'm about to be ambushed by two wolves at once. My chances of survival just dropped significantly. I hinge forward slightly, settling into a stance that will drop me directly in front of them when I shift into my Rottweiler form. I prepare myself for the worst. The door to the bathroom suddenly flies open and the lock snaps inward. My eyes widen when into frame steps the most attractive man I've ever seen. Right now, he might not be looking at me, but I am certainly looking at him.

Almost nine years of waking life that I've existed, and I can't think of one single person more attractive than he is. He stands over a foot taller than myself and his softly tousled black hair falls to the left. His perfect tanned skin compliments the tight, plain black t-shirt he's donning. His arms are characterized by a full black and grey sleeve tattoo on his left, and a colorful quarter sleeve on his right. They accentuate his sculpted muscles, giving him an even stronger appearance.

Mainly, I can't look away from his deep, ebony eyes.

His jet-black stare is something I unintentionally find myself wanting to get lost in; perfectly cut prisms of onyx that are nothing short of hypnotic right now. They smolder with intensity and mystery. His irises reflect the peaceful, endless depths of space that leave me wondering what's really outside of our existence. I want to know what's beyond the outer rim of his solar system.

For longer than is acceptable or necessary, I'm so taken aback by his inviting looks, I forget the fact that this man is the other wolf.

Pitch black ire drills into the creepy guy who now seems rather panicked. He glares at him for a few seconds before speaking in very a demanding tone.

"Levati dalle palle prima che t'ammazzi, Matteo. Adesso