Chapter 9 Their secret

Lukas kicked his door open, Viktor in hand as they laughed and walked in. The lights are off but Lukas knows his room through and through. Their giggles echoed through the hall.

"That taxi driver will be scarred" Viktor laughed, planting a kiss on Lukas's forehead.

"He just kept looking through the mirror." he laughed harder. "I had no idea how to avoid eye contact."

Lukas dropped him gently on the bed, trailing kisses down his neck, biting him softly.

"I just want to kiss your neck down to your back," Lukas grinned and Viktor giggled.

"You can," he wrapped his legs around his neck "... just be gentle."

He giggled and replied "I won't"

And Viktor's smile faded. His eyes widened in fear as he was flipped over. Lukas's laugh echoed through the room, ending the initial peace.

"Should I help you take off your clothes or...?" Lukas towered over him, his eyes undressing him already.

"I'll take it off myself..." Viktor laughed nervously. He hadn't felt this tension in a while. Lukas sat on the edge of the bed, bare and ripped, his eyes focused tightly on Viktor as he struggled to take off his pants. Lukas walked over to him and held his pants,

"Jeez! Lukas! Wear pants!" He yelled and Viktor flinched. "I'm sorry... I feel tense," he calmed.

"We've had sex already, Viktor." He wrapped his hand around his waist. "You're beautiful so... take it off."

Viktor giggled and pulled his pants down. The air was cold. He hadn't even had time to admire the room yet. It was massive, white and stainless... unlike his. It was perfect, just like the owner.

"Your room is so... neat."

"Enough stalling. Come" Lukas gestured, his hand hitting the bed softly.

Viktor laughed nervously, a trail of tears dripping down his face. "Remember, be gentle."

"I won't promise." He laughed.

He wasn't gentle. Each thrust came with some complaint.

"You wanted to leave us.." another thrust

"Leave this!" He thrusted even harder, holding Viktor's neck to look at the ceiling.

"I'm...sorry" Viktor struggled to place his words. If he wasn't apologizing, he was begging. But soon after, Viktor's waist began to move like it had a mind of its own.

"Oh, Viktor! I thought I was to be gentle!" Lukas spoke, reducing his pace.

"Don't...stop"

Lukas bit his lip and leaned in, filling him up to the brim. A smile slid across his face.

"You're going to regret saying that." He said, barely above a breath and the night came alive.

Their moans, grunts, trusts and tears filled the night but the night didn't stay loud forever... it couldn't.

At some point, the room fell quiet again except for the sound of uneven breathing and the faint hum of the night outside. The tension that had filled the air slowly dissolved, leaving behind something softer... but heavier.

Lukas stilled.

Not suddenly, not sharply...just gradually, like something in him had finally run out. For a moment, he didn't move at all then he exhaled and reality started creeping back in.

Viktor lay beneath him, completely spent, his chest rising and falling slowly, eyes half-lidded. His fingers twitched slightly against the sheets, like he was trying to hold onto something... or steady himself.

"Lukas... please" he murmured, his voice barely there.

Not accusing, not upset... just tired and that was what got to him-not his words but the tone.

Lukas pulled back slightly, his expression shifting for the first time that night. The intensity in his eyes didn't disappear completely, but it cracked just enough to let something else through.

He ran a hand through his hair, breathing out slowly as he looked away for a second.

"...you should've stopped me," he muttered.

It wasn't a joke...It wasn't even really directed at Viktor.

It sounded more like something he was saying to himself.

Viktor let out a weak laugh, turning his head slightly.

"You don't listen," he said softly.

That almost sounded like before...in the rink, like the teasing and somehow, that made Lukas's chest tighten. There was a pause before Lukas shifted, moving off him and sitting at the edge of the bed, his back turned slightly. The room felt different now...less chaotic, but more exposed.

"Did you mean it?" Viktor asked after a while.

Lukas didn't turn.

"Mean what?"

"That... you hated me."

The question sat between them and Lukas's fingers tightened slightly against his knee.

"I don't know," he said finally.

And for once, that was the truth. Another silence followed, but this one wasn't uncomfortable. It was just... honest.

Viktor shifted slightly, wincing a bit before letting out a quiet breath.

"You're still mad," he said.

"Yeah."

"You're still here."

Lukas didn't respond immediately.

Then-

"...so are you."

That earned a small laugh. Tired and soft before Viktor coughed and stretched his hands, "let's sleep...together."

Lukas didn't argue, he just dug his head into Viktor's body and sighed.

"You won't leave me, yeah?" He said without looking up. His voice was shaky and his grip was tightening around Viktor's waist.

"I won't. I promise. Now let's just sleep" he patted his hair.

"Okay...I'll believe you." And the night pulled them both aggressively. They both slept in each other's arms. The air rushed in and the weather changed slowly. Rain drizzled softly and Lukas opened his eyes to look around.

"So it wasn't a dream? I'm actually here...wow" he whispered and he turned into Viktor even more.

"No it's not," Viktor replied...his voice raspy from sleep. "We're here together, after all these years" his hand tightened around him. "Let's enjoy this moment, okay?"

"Okay," but he didn't say it out...he just slept.