Chapter 2 Don't judge me

Sera's POV

This is not a good idea.

But it's not a bad idea either.

At least that's what I keep trying to tell myself while staring at the flight tickets to New York in the next four hours.

"Sera?"

I'm jerked out of my thoughts to find Owen blinking at me, a frown on his face.

"How're you feeling?" He asks.

I shrug. "I'm okay."

His brows dip. "Do you still love him? You never told me about your relationship with him."

A bitter laugh leaves my lips. "I'd rather not rehash the memories."

"I understand," he hums, eyes dimming. "I got you coffee and donuts, though."

Owen holds up the bag of goodies, the scent wafting through my nostrils. My stomach grumbles, eager.

"Thank you." I grab the bag from him, taking a sip of the coffee.

Coffee makes everything feel better, and I need it for the way my heart is hurting.

"You're welcome." He smiles. "How's Ezzy?"

My son's little face comes to the forefront of my mind, and I find his picture on my desk. "He's fine. He's at school, thankfully."

"Alright." Owen smiles back and gets up to leave but pauses, settling back down.

I raise a brow. "What's going on?"

"Not to be a bummer but... did you see the post?" He leans forward, voice dropping an octave lower. "The internet is going crazy."

The smile on my face disappears, spine stiffening.

"Yea." My lips press into a thin line. "I did."

I had to turn my phone off when every notification chime almost made me lose my mind.

"The most eligible bachelor slash billionaire is off the market. There's a lot of wailing, and speculation about the mystery woman."

"Of course there is," I reply. "Everything's pretty hush hush."

This is the last conversation I want to have, not to mention I had to write about my ex's engagement last night.

"But he hasn't been seen with anyone, so why now?"

I shrug. "Because he knows what the media is like."

Owen nods. "I don't blame him though, I wouldn't want to-"

A chime from his iPad interrupts him.

"Oh shit!" He cusses, shooting to his feet with wide eyes. "Wendy just got into the office."

Owen and Wendy have their...differences. He's never at his office, and Wendy hates that.

I chuckle at his panic-stricken face. "She's going to be upset if she sees you here, hurry up."

"I'll talk to you later, Sera."

He leaves my office, and I take a bite of the donut.

The flight tickets still glare at me, and I let out a long sigh.

I just need closure. To let him go officially.

"I hope I don't regret this," I mutter.

Grabbing my phone, I call Ivy, my best friend. She picks up on the fourth ring.

"Hi!" She greets, sounding out of breath.

I smile. "Ivy, hey. Is this a bad time?"

"No, Sera. What's up?"

"D-did you hear about Adrian?" I mumble.

"Oh honey," she sighs. "He's proposing to his mystery lady."

"Yea..."

The line crackles for a bit, and her voice comes in again. "I know you still like him but-"

"I don't!" I blurt.

"But," she punctuates, "I think you should let him go, holding on to the past is not healthy."

"I'm not holding on to anything. It's just Ezra..."

"Sera look-" she cuts in, "Ezra's still young. There's still years for him to know his father."

I don't reply for a while, staring at the flight tickets.

"Okay, don't judge me Ivy-"

"Oh no," she groans. "What did you do?"

My heart pounds, throat drying up. She's already judging me and I've barely gotten a word in.

"I-I need closure, Ivy. You adviced that I should move on, but I can't do that unless I get closure."

"And how do you want to get closure?"

I chew on my bottom lip.

"No, Sera!" She gasps. "Don't tell you want to crash his engagement."

"I don't!" I nearly shriek, shaking my head as if she can see me. "I'm not going to crash it. I just want to talk with him."

Ivy clicks her tongue. "It's a bad idea, and that's me putting it nicely because frankly, it's the worst idea you've ever had."

The bite in her tone sends a pang through my chest.

"Why?" I hiss, eyes twitching. "Four years, Ivy. It's been four years since, and I've not been able to move on."

"And you don't think that's a 'you' problem?" She snaps.

My brows pull together and I stare at the caller ID to be sure I'm still talking with Ivy. Sure enough her name with a bunch of flower emojis stare back at me.

She sighs. "Listen, I'm your best friend, Sera, and trust me when I tell you you're only going to get yourself more hurt."

"Too late," I say. "I've already gotten tickets."

The line goes quiet before she speaks again. "How are you going to get in? It's invite only."

"I know you were invited, Ivy." I roll my eyes. "Don't play coy with me."

Ivy is a model with a large fan base, so she gets invites to most of the events. Having her as a friend has helped my career because she gives most of the gossip for my articles.

Unfortunately, she didn't give me this one.

"I was," she confirms.

"Please, Ivy," I beg her. "You know I need this, come on."

Adrian Cross was once the boy I loved. Until he broke my heart, and I was left with a baby that belonged to him...and a heart that still beats for him.

"Sera... there's no way to change your mind, is there?" Ivy asks.

I frown. "Why do you keep trying to stop me?"

"Because you will get hurt, Sera," she practically wails. "I'm only trying to protect you. But if it's what you want, I'll send you the code to get in."

Seeing the rumors and the confirmations have already hurt me. There's nothing left to hurt, nothing left for him to ruin.

Now, I just need to officially cut all ties. Just...nip it in the bud and move on with my life.

"Thank you," I whisper, heart heavy. "It's something I have to do."

The notification from her pops up on my open laptop.

"I can only wish you the best, Sera."

"What do you mean by that?" I ask, lips pulled down in confusion.

"It means whatever you want it to mean," she replies. "By the way, what of Ezra? You'll keep him in LA?"

"No," I respond. "I'm taking him to meet his father."