How could I possibly live my life knowing he might never be mine - at least, not until I'm back into my body.
My vision blurred as I tried to keep the tears from falling while flipping the pages full of things I didn't understand until I opened a page and a strange, single word stood pretty on the page
Steven.
It was a name, scribbled in the margin. A random word on a random page, but it just had this twist to it.
Maybe it meant something.
I picked up her phone beside me, typing in the word "Steven" into the lock screen and click.
It unlocked.
Messages instantly flooded the screen, ton of the notifications from someone with the name Aria.
"Are you ready?"
"We agreed to meet after your brother's coronation."
The two most recent messages read.
My breath hitched as I scrolled through the notifications, some were from Jeremy, asking if I was fine now..
I scrolled through the messages between them and I saw that there really wasn't much to them.
Their text just contained lots of heyyy, how're you doing, I'm good and several boring messages like that.
Maybe they only do meet to talk and act like lovers.
"Who exactly is this Clara girl?", I thought.
And Who is the Aria girl that she agreed to meet with?
I pressed their chat and there was nothing except the previous night messages and it had no new information apart from the fact that she kept typing her name, telling her they were expecting her..
I dropped the phone, walking out of the room, just maybe I could see Damon.
But the silence in the halls was deafening.
His scent was no longer in the house.
They had left for the house we both decorated
They were probably sleeping in the sheets I specially picked, my favourite.
Or probably making love.
I chocked back another sob as I thought about it, Suddenly, a soft cough echoed in the hallway and I cleared my throat, swiping my hands across my eyes to make sure I had no tears welling up.
I stood there wearing Clara's life like a poorly fitted costume.
"Miss Clara, is anything the problem?", The lady asked, looking so confused.
It was one of the maids.
"Am I probably doing what Clara wouldn't do", I thought.
"I'm good", I said, my voice - a bit too high as I tried to mimic Clara's nonchalant tone.
"I was just thinking... uhm, you know me a bit too well right", I asked.
The young lady smiled as she walked closer to me.
"I know you a bit too well, Miss Clara, I've been your favourite maid for a while",she said
"Favourite maid...nice, we're getting closer", I thought.
"How about a quick test, where's my favourite place to unwind?", I asked
She furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.
"Miss Clara...", She started but I stopped her.
"Like I mean, my friends, the place we usually meet", I said, hoping I do not look desperately insane.
"You should have noticed if you're my favorite", I added.
"You... you never speak of such things, Miss Clara," she said, her confusion deepening.
"You aren't... that transparent", she said, scratching her head
"Of course she isn't", I thought bitterly.
Secretive bitch.
There goes my chance at finding this out.
The maid then hesitated, reaching into the pocket of her apron, she brought out a small silver key with a black head.
It was a Car key.
"You gave this to me for safekeeping last week. You said you didn't want it to be seen when your room was been checked last week." She held it out, her gaze darting away, as if she'd already said too much.
"They check her room? And she hides things?", I thought.
"A car key for that matter", I thought
I took the key. It was cold and heavy in my palm.
It could be a clue.
"Thanks for keeping it safe", I said as I walked back into the room.
It was close to evening and since I had nothing I was doing, I made my way to the garage, it didn't take me minutes because Damon and I once made out in his car in the garage.
Good old days.
I unlocked the car and i entered it, checking the list of saved addresses on the navigation system that glowed back at me. I selected the top one, the most recent one.
"It had to be it", I thought as I set out on a journey of self discovery.
The drive was a bit too far, I kept following the navigation but it didn't seem to stop. I was far away from home, I had never been that far.
I kept wondering where it would lead to as I drove
After what felt like eternity of a boring drive, I stopped in front of a big bar pulsing with loud songs that could be heard from outside.
As I stepped out, the air smelt of liquor and humans - no traces of wolf.
Nothing.
I took a deep breath and I walked into the bar, regretting why I had started the journey.
I'd taken only a few steps when strong arms wrapped around me from behind.
I froze.
Warm lips pressed against the sensitive skin of my neck, just below my ear, sending waves of shock down my spine.
His scent was foreign, clean soap, a hint of cologne, and the undeniable scent of human.
"After promising me a hot fuck, you decided to ditch me, huh Clara?" a low, male voice murmured into my hair as his hands slid down, palms flattening against my stomach, pulling me flush against a hard, solid body.
I wanted to push him away, probably punch him in the face also but I'm Clara.
He thinks I'm her and I have to be her.
I took a deep breath, a wide smile on my face as I turned in his arms, finally looking at him.
To my surprise, he was handsome, dark hair, strong jawline and I could see the confidence in his eyes.
He knew Clara...maybe intimately.
"I thought she has Jeremy, does she just fuck around now", I thought.
"I got held up, I'm sorry," I managed, forcing Clara's sly smile onto my face, praying it looked convincing.
"Uh-huh," he said, his voice a low rumble. He didn't believe me, but he didn't care. His hand came up, his thumb brushing my lower lip.
"You owe me, Clara. Big time."
Before I could form another word, his mouth was on mine.
It wasn't a gentle kiss, it was claiming and rough.
His tongue swirled in my mouth and a jolt of electric shock surged through me.
I gasped against his lips, and he swallowed the sound, as he tightened his hands around me.
"This was wrong", I screamed in my mind
But there was this difference in the way I felt.
It was nothing like a wolf.
It was just pure human hunger..
He broke the kiss, his breathing rough.
"We could go to your favourite place, unless you're going to run again."
They had a favourite place?
I couldn't speak. I could only nod.
I didn't understand what was going on.
Why I liked it even though I wasn't Clara.
The hollow ache inside me was shifting, melting into a desperate, throbbing need. I needed to feel something, anything, other than the loss.
This stranger was offering a wildfire to burn it all away.
He took my hand, his grip tight and he led me inside the club, it was quite bubbly and loud.
He led me to a side door just because a stairs and he opened it while I followed like a lost puppy.
He opened the door to reveal a modern apartment. It was quite big and well furnished.
We both entered and the moment the door clicked shut, he pushed me against it, the cold door hitting my back, making me gasp in shock.
One of his hands cupped my breast, his thumb flickering my nipple until it became so hard and aching.
I let out a small moan as his other hand slid down to my thigh, pushing my dress up to my hips.
"You feel so tense," he growled in a hoarse voice against my neck.
"I can help with that", he said and I moaned.
His fingers found the edge of my panties and he slid his fingertips inside my core. I moaned, biting my bottom lip. I was wet already, shamelessly wet for this stranger.
My body was betraying every touch of Damon, responding to the touch of the stranger I just met.
He added another finger as he held me against the door, his hands curling, flickering, going in and out of my wet hole while I moaned in pleasure.
He pressed his thumb against my clit and I almost went insane.
Oh..it felt so good.
Suddenly, my hips began to move of their own accord, rocking hard against his hand as the pleasure built up, drawing me closer to the edge.
I opened my eyes and I saw that he was watching me, his eyes dark with lust, watching as I rode his fingers like a sex deprived maniac.
"You're going to come for me,Clara. Now",he said and it was almost like he commanded me.
I couldn't stop it as the orgasms ripped through me and I screamed in pleasure.
Before the last shock had even left my body, he was unbuckling his belt, he pushed his jeans and briefs down just enough, freeing himself.
He was hard, thick and ready and a bit big. He hooked his hands under my thighs, lifting one of my legs up to his waist as I wrapped my hands around his neck for balance.
"I want you to look at me," he commanded, his voice hoarse.
I opened my eyes, I was staring into the face of a stranger, and I'd never been more turned on in my life.
He positioned himself at my entrance.
"Tell me you want this."
"I want it," I gasped, the words feeling both like a lie and the most honest thing I'd ever said.
"I want it. Please."
With a grunt, he thrust up into me, filling me in one thrust. I screamed, the sensation so intense it was almost pain. He was stretching me.
He stopped for a moment, giving me the time to get used to his length.
Then he began to move.
It was a slow thrust at first, hitting the spot that made my legs weak.
I moaned so loud that I feared my voice might be heard even with the loud music from the bar.
I raked my nails down his skin as his ragged grunts echoed in my ear while he increased his pace.
Deeper...Faster....Harder.
"You feel... fucking... incredible," he panted, his forehead resting against mine.
I could only moan in response, lost in the pleasure, bouncing up and down on his shaft as the pleasure started building again, a higher peak this time.
His pace became ragged brutal. "I'm not... gonna last..."
"Do... don't st...stop," I begged, my voice cracking at the pace of the thrust.
He slammed into me one last time, a deep, possessive thrust that pressed against my very core, and with a loud grunt, he spilled into me.
The raw feeling of him pushing me over the final edge as I screamed in estascy, almost as loud as a banshee as my second orgasm shattered through me.
When I finally regained consciousness, I was weak to my knees, I hugged him tight, resting my whole weight on him as we laid there, still connected.
Our breathing slowly coming back to normal.
After a while, he released me and he lowered me slowly to the floor. I staggered a bit, my legs barely supporting me as I walked to the chair few meters away.
"Can you pass me my bag?", I asked as he tossed the bag I had threw on the floor when we entered the room to me.
"You... you feel different tonight, Clara", he said as he entered the shower, a huge smile on his face.
I swiped up my phone and I saw a message from Clara.
"Oh yes, did she even know I was around?", I thought.
I clicked the message to read.
"I saw you leave with Nick, Please tell me you guys didn't fuck", the message read.
Oh shit....did I just fuck up?