Chapter 4 004

[Seline's POV]

"No... no, please stay back!" Those words echoed in my head. My vision flashed, blood splattering as I watched some of the panther shifters fall.

The last sight of their leader crumbling to his knees, bleeding as he pleaded for mercy. What happened next after my eyes shut, I couldn't say.

It felt like I had ended up in a new world, as all I gazed upon were white fogs.

"Mate?" I heard a whisper coming to my mind. "Am I dead?" I wondered, even more. If this was what they called the afterlife.

But then, in between the whole place, I caught sight of a man. Who was he? Could it be him? I tried taking further steps to close in, but the strange disappeared into the fogs before I could catch a clear sight of who he was.

The whole place emptied; I was the only one there. If this was the afterlife... I would have surely said it was what I had longed for so much-the silence and peace. But what about Mom? She was all alone, still sick in her bed. I couldn't leave her alone.

There were still many things I had wanted to do, but if so, if I was truly dead, it seemed they were all gone for me. I had to accept the truth. But I just couldn't accept it that easily.

Just then, a bright light shined brightly, causing me to flinch. I stumbled back, only to fall to the ground.

I woke up to find out it was just a dream-the white fog and all. As I felt a sharp ache on my head, I scanned the area. I was in a room, but whose room was this? I tried sitting up, only to pause, feeling a sting. My stomach was bandaged, and it seemed my bleeding had stopped.

"So I was not dead," I said. But what had happened that night? A man showed up, saving me. Wait... it was him. I was quite sure of it.

A creak drew my attention to the door, and then I caught sight of Austin making his way in, so I was right in the end.

But wait, so he was my mate? That explained the feeling I had been having the very moment I set eyes on him-one that drew me closer, my heart hoping to trust once more. A stranger.

"You're awake," he said, approaching my side as he sat on the bed edge. I watched his eyes travel to my bandaged stomach. "And it seems your wounds are healing also."

All I did at that moment was stare; I couldn't even look away. Ever since he had arrived, trying to protect me, the feelings I had-a part of me wanted this. I mean, what if I was wrong in the end? What if my happiness had never died? Was there still hope? He was my mate, right? And the way he had always looked at me, could it be he had also known about it?

"Thanks," I managed a whisper, smiling as he just smiled back. He stood up after leaving the room, and I wondered where he had gone, only for him to arrive not long after with water in a bowl. From the steam, I could tell the water was warm. He soaked the towel in the water, twisted it, releasing the water from it before he pressed it on my stomach. A warm feeling found its way to my skin, one that relieved me of the pain a bit.

"I think this should help a bit," he said.

As he repeated the same process until he was done cleaning my wounds, he helped me change the bandages, disposing of the used ones.

If it was the other way around, I wouldn't have seen myself allowing this, yet I felt so calm around his presence, carefree. So this was how it truly felt to find your mate.

"You must be hungry," Austin said. After helping me with my wounds, he went to prepare soup and sat down beside me on the bed, helping me sit up.

"I'm sure you will like this," he said with a smile, one that seemed warm.

"Open up," he said as I hesitated for a while before opening my mouth as he fed me a spoonful.

A little drop stained my lips as Austin took a handkerchief, wiping the stain away. Our eyes met again. "Are you feeling okay now?" he asked.

Now, I had no doubt about it; he must feel the same, right?

"Thanks," I said, feeling my cheeks turn red. My lips curved into a smile, one that seemed I had lost forever. Even with the fact that I didn't know much about him, I was ready to spend each and every day I had with him.

As I suddenly watched him pause, his hands tightening on the spoon before he stood up, dropping the soup plate on the nightstand as he turned, avoiding a glance at me.

"What had happened?" I only wondered, only for me to hear the words from him.

"I will be leaving now. Do take care of yourself," he said, hoping to leave. But in a blink, I found myself trying to stand up. "Wait," I wanted to say, but my wounded body betrayed me, leaving some pains that shot through every part of me. "Ah," I groaned in pain, almost stumbling back down, only for Austin to save me from falling.

"Are you okay?" he questioned. But I only smiled. "You felt it too, right?" I asked before he suddenly let go, turning away from me.

So I was right; he had also felt it. I approached his side, barely maintaining a stance. As I held his hands:

"You are not a complete wolf, are you?" I heard Austin utter in a whisper. My heart seized in those moments. Could it be that he already knew?

He turned back at me, those eyes saying he knew already. "So you're a hybrid. Half lycan, half warlock."

I retreated my legs a bit. "How did you know that?" I asked, only to watch him closing the distance on me as my back pressed against the wall with him standing closely. Way too close. "Last night, I saw you use some spells, so that can only explain it," he said.

But even so, he knows. How did that have to do with what we were discussing?

I watched him chuckle softly, bringing many questions to my mind. "So now I am being punished with a burden..." I heard Austin say, those words wiping off the little smile that made its way to my lips. What did Austin mean by that?

"What do you mean? Is something wrong?" I asked, hoping I had heard those words wrong, but he only turned away from me, trying to avoid a glance at me again.

"Please tell me, why are you..." I wanted to say, but my words only caught up in my throat, silencing me. "Enough!" he yelled, his clenched fist slamming against the wall as I watched them bleed.

I froze at that moment; this wasn't the same person I had witnessed before. The raging eyes that took over his, his teeth snarling, as he withdrew from my side, only to pick up a glass and slam it on the ground as it shattered into pieces.

"Damn it," he muttered.

I remained there, watching, trying to process what was happening, why he had suddenly grown angrier.

Still, my legs never hesitated in approaching him again, trying to get his attention back, asking him if something was wrong, helping him through, but the words that came out of his mouth brought me crumbling to my knees.

"I say this for your own good. Forget we ever met," he said.

But what did he mean by that? Why was he saying all this?

"What? How? I can't. You are my mate, aren't you?" I questioned.

As I heard those words escape his lips again before his fist clenched back:

"You are not my mate. Don't even have the impression of that."

I stood up, this time holding his hands tightly, turning to meet his gaze. "What are you saying?" I questioned, but he only flung my hands away.

"Isn't it clear enough?" he said. "I don't want a hybrid as my mate. You are going to ruin everything, all I have worked so hard to build..."

"He must be joking, right? All this was never real, right?" I had myself believing that, as i still approached his side.

"Why? Just why? You can't say I should forget we are mates." I questioned, refusing to accept the words that came out of his mouth. He was caring at the beginning, and now it only seemed like I was looking upon another person. My mind couldn't help but say there was more to this, that this wasn't about me being a hybrid. It wasn't right.

"Please tell me, what happened?" I questioned, only to watch those eyes of his narrow at me.

Even so, I didn't retreat. I wanted to know; I saw it as my right to know. This wasn't what he really felt inside, was it? He must also want me as his mate. Want us to be together. So why would he then say all this, claiming he never wanted that?

I pressed harder, hoping to get the truth out. "It's all a lie, right? You don't really mean all those words, do you?" But who was I kidding in the end? "I said enough!" Austin yelled again. This time, I watched his hand raise, only to stop in mid-air. He had raised his hand at me.

Should I really put my hope in the idea that he really wanted me as his mate? Should I?

My fixed legs began staggering, staring at that hand of his that was ready to harm me in the very next second before he withdrew his hand back.

"You want the truth, don't you?" he said. "The truth is that I can't bear the idea of having a mate who isn't even a complete wolf," he spat. His words felt like sharp claws as they slashed through me. I could hear my heart shattering at those moments. I found myself crumbling to the ground. I wanted to utter something, but no words came to my mouth. Just like I was dead the moment when his words hit me.

"Not him also," the same words I had received from my very birth. Why was i to be blamed? I never chose to be born as a hybrid. Mom had said it also. "Not even a complete wolf". The pack we were in had said it before casting us out.

Everybody had always said it. But why did I find myself always having to face it all? Useless. Trash. Weakling. They seemed like my everyday nicknames.

Before I even knew it, little tears swelled in my eyes as they trailed down. I remained there, only to watch Austin leave after shutting the door behind him.

Did I make a mistake, letting myself have hope again? That maybe things would be different? Have I truly forgotten the reality of myself in just a blink when I found out he was my mate?

I tried standing up again, only to fall back to my knees. "Argh," I groaned harder, using the bed as support. My hands clenched on the bedsheet-the same hand that had just fed me now raising to hurt me.

I sat down on the bed after a great effort, my gaze going back to the room door. "It's all a lie, right?" A side of me believed he was going to return, come back, enter the same door right now, and tell me he made a mistake. He had said those words, but why couldn't I accept it and just let it go? There was no love for me in those words; I should accept that fact.

I coughed harder; my voice caught up in my throat as I drank some water from the cup on the nightstand, heaving a breath.