Chapter 5 Cassian's Guilt

Cassian's POV

I was lost in my thoughts when I heard voices-low, whispering in the corridor. I stopped and strained to hear. I immediately recognized one voice. Cassian.

"I didn't want it to happen like this, Elowen," he continued, his voice taut with shame. "But it did. "Everything my father did for my family is now my responsibility."

I leaned forward, my heart racing. The other voice, Elowen's, was quiet and almost calming in its answer. "You can't handle it all, Cassian." You didn't do this. But you have to finish it.

I held my breath. Do you feel guilty? Was that what I heard in his voice? I wanted to get up and confront him, but something held me in my seat.

He said, "I can't change it." "But... I should have stopped it before it started."

I heard footsteps shuffling closer. His comments, which were admissions of guilt, broke the silence of the night like a knife. As the door opened, my heart raced. I saw Cassian standing just outside, and our eyes met before I could do anything.

There was something in his eyes that I couldn't put my finger on. He said, "Seraphina," his voice hoarse. "You didn't hear that."

I didn't say anything. I didn't have to. I already had his confession stamped in my mind, whether he wanted me to hear it or not.

The next morning, I walked by Cassian in the corridor and we hardly looked at each other. We were both tense, but we didn't say anything about it. I could sense it in the air. I could hear every step I took in my thoughts.

But it wasn't until later that I actually saw him in the elevator. I expected the silence would swallow us up, but instead it felt like something delicate and unstable was rising up underneath.

Cassian pushed the button for the top level and stood next to me, not looking at me. "Are you okay?" I inquired, attempting to ease the tension, but the words seemed empty coming from me. I wasn't even sure whether I was okay.

He gave out a soft, almost inaudible sigh. "I've been better," he said under his breath. "But we have to do what we have to do, right?"

I looked at him then, and for the first time since the night before, our eyes met. There was something in his eyes that made him look vulnerable, even though he usually looked indifferent. I could sense the words that weren't said between us, but they stayed that way.

"Is that how you sleep?" I asked, my voice low but clear.

He clinched his jaw, and for a fleeting second, I glimpsed something-maybe guilt or regret-before he shut himself off again. "It's not that easy."

The elevator dinged, and the doors opened to the top floor. Cassian went out first without waiting for me, and I followed him, not sure if I was going away from the truth or toward it.

That afternoon, the workplace was quiet save for the soft tapping of my keyboard. I tried to pay attention to the reports in front of me, but I kept thinking about what Cassian had said.

The stress was too much by the middle of the afternoon. I couldn't just sit there anymore. I walked into his office, and the door clicked shut behind me.

When I walked in, Cassian didn't glance up from his desk. His hands were clasped in front of him like he was deep in contemplation. The polished wood walls of his office made it look gloomy and scary, just like the man himself.

He didn't look up as he questioned, "What do you want?"

I said, "I need to know the truth," and my voice shook a little. "About my dad." About what went down. "Don't lie to me."

Cassian's shoulders got tight. Finally, he put the papers down and looked at me. His face was harsh yet tired.

He said in a quiet voice, nearly a whisper, "Your father didn't die by accident, Seraphina." "I knew he was in trouble. I knew it was going to happen, but I didn't stop it. And I should have.

His words hit me like a freight train, and my heart raced. I tried to say something, but nothing came out. Instead, I stood there, paralyzed, looking at the man who had hurt me so deeply. He stared at me with a mix of regret and something darker-something I wasn't ready to deal with.

"I'm sorry," he muttered, and the words were hard to hear. "But that's the truth."

The truth. It hurt like a punch in the gut. But even though it hurt, there was a peculiar sense of clarity. I finally found the solution I had been looking for.

But now I had no idea what to do with it.

"Why are you showing me this?" I asked, trying not to let the resentment show in my voice.

Cassian didn't answer right away. He didn't do that. Instead, he opened a drawer in his desk and took out an old envelope that was yellowed with age. The seal was broken, but it seemed like it had been taken care of. He pushed it across the desk toward me, and the weight of the action was heavy in the air.

I opened it gingerly, my hands shaking. There was a letter inside, and the words were very different from the peacefulness that was all about us. It was written months before he died.

The letter started with "To whom it may concern." "I think I've gotten caught up in something much bigger than I thought I would." Evander Wrenford is not the person he says he is. The deals we've made are much worse than either of us can get out of.

I stopped moving. My dad had known. He had learned something. As I read the rest of the letter, the ink seemed to get more urgent with each line, and I couldn't breathe.

Cassian's voice disturbed the quiet. "I couldn't stop it, Seraphina." I tried, but it was too late by then.

I looked up and saw the raw emotion in his eyes. He fought so hard to keep his icy appearance, but the anguish and regret were all there, hidden within. But the truth was finally coming out. And now there was no way to go back.

I couldn't stand how heavy the letter was in my hands. It was all true: what I had heard about my father's ties to the Wrenford family and the darkness I had been warned against. It seemed like I had just entered a new world that I didn't understand but was already completely involved in.

I didn't say anything since I didn't know what to say. I could feel the tension in the room getting stronger, like the walls were closing in on us. Cassian, who was standing a few feet away, looked exactly like the guy who had taken over his family's empire. But now he was standing stiffly, and his normal confidence was gone.

He murmured softly, "I should have told you sooner." "Your dad was involved in something much worse than you can imagine." And I... I knew.

My heart raced. "What did you really know, Cassian?" My voice was barely above a whisper, but the inquiry felt like it had been growing up inside me for years.

His eyes flicked to the floor and then back to me, this time with a look of sorrow. "I knew your dad was in trouble. But I couldn't stop it. "I saw him fall and did nothing."

I took a step back, my head spinning. "You knew?" I said it again, this time louder. "And you didn't do anything?"

His look softened. "I couldn't, Seraphina." I was stuck, just like him.

The quiet between us grew thick and heavy with things we didn't say. I tried to put together the broken pieces of reality in my head, but nothing made sense.

I felt it, a presence, something cold, just as I was ready to ask another question. I turned around, but the room was empty. The door silently shut behind me.

Someone was keeping an eye on you. And I had no idea who.