Chapter 1 I CAN'T! I NEED TO MOURN HER.

~ JANE'S POV ~

As I rose from the bed, my back protested with a dull ache, a consequence of sitting rigidly on the edge of the bed for a long time. Since arriving at my mother's apartment, I'd barely taken a moment to breathe.

The opulent decor seemed almost incongruous with the turmoil brewing inside me. My gaze wandered, taking in the familiar yet somehow foreign surroundings.

The apartment's sheer size was overwhelming, the thought of the times I had spent with my mom before I got married to Logan came flooding back.

As I walked out of the room to the sitting room, my eyes drifted to a portrait on the wall, a photograph of my mother that seemed to gaze back at me with warmth and kindness. The sight was almost too much to bear, and I felt a lump form in my throat as memories began to flood back.

My mom had been my only source of joy, she had been the one who took care of me right from when my father abandoned us. I was just five then.

As I stood there, frozen in front of the portrait, tears streamed down my eyes, I couldn't help but think about the last time we'd spoken, the last time I'd seen her... and now she was gone. The weight of my grief threatened to consume me, and I wasn't sure how to process it all.

My phone buzzed in my bag, making me snap out of my grief-stricken trance, flinching at the sudden interruption. I quickly wiped away my tears and grabbed my phone, my heart sinking further when I saw Kate's name flashing on the screen, my best friend, who knew me all too well.

"Hey, Jane, how are you holding up?" she asked as soon as I answered.

"I'm fine" I replied, forcing a weak smile, through sniffles, trying to hide my emotional state. But Kate wasn't buying it.

"Don't even try to lie to me, Jane. I know you're crying. You need to be strong for what's ahead, sweetie. Your mom would want you to be strong and resilient, not still grieving like this," she said, her words a mix of concern and gentle prodding.

Kate's words, though well-intentioned, stung a bit. She was right, of course, Mom would want me to be strong. But it's hard to put on a brave face when the pain feels so raw.

"Where are you now?" She continued.

"I'm in mom's place, I came to have a look at the place for the last time before the things were packed after the burial." I replied making my way outside the apartment.

"Ohh, well the burial, when is the date?" Kate inquired.

"It's this Saturday, Her company is handling the arrangements as a last tribute to her." I responded.

"Ok, well my flight will be leaving very early tomorrow morning, I will be there soon ok? My regards to Logan, be safe, love you." she said as she ended the call.

I hung up and quickly got into my car, realizing it was getting late. I had completely forgotten about cooking dinner for Logan and didn't want him to come home to an empty house without a meal ready.

It was past 10 pm, and Logan still hadn't returned home. I had dozed off on the sofa, waiting for him, but his absence was starting to worry me.

Over the past week, Logan had been acting strangely distant, and I hadn't had a chance to talk to him about it.

The loss of my mother was still weighing heavily on me, and his detachment was making things even tougher.

What concerned me most was how Logan seemed to be going about his life as usual, without any visible signs of empathy or acknowledgment of my loss.

He hadn't taken time off work to pay his respects, and he hadn't even asked how I was coping. It was as if he was oblivious to the pain I was going through. I couldn't understand why he was being so detached, especially when I needed him the most.

The silence in the house was oppressive, and I couldn't shake off the feeling that something was off in our relationship. I needed Logan's support and comfort now more than ever, but his absence was leaving me feeling isolated and alone.

I sat lost in thought, the sudden noise of horn at the estate gate broke the silence. I assumed it was Logan, and a mix of relief and anticipation washed over me. I had been waiting for him to return so we could finally talk over dinner, despite the late hour.

I stood up, smoothing out my clothes, and made my way to the door, expecting Logan to walk in with a tired smile and a greeting.

But the door burst open with a force that startled me, and Logan strode in, his movements abrupt and uncoordinated.

"Logan, you're back," I said, trying to sound welcoming, as I reached out to take his bag and coat. However, the strong smell of alcohol hit me like a punch to the gut as he drew closer. My eyes widened in surprise and concern as I realized he was intoxicated.

Before I could react, Logan pulled me into a tight embrace, his suitcase thudding to the floor as he tossed his coat aside.

"You're drunk again, Logan" I said, trying to keep my voice steady as I attempted to push him away. But he held me firmly in place, his grip tight and unyielding. I felt a wave of frustration and worry wash over me as I struggled to understand what was going on with him, he placed a kiss on my neck mumbling words I didn't understand.

The smell of alcohol and the way he stumbled slightly made me realize just how drunk he was. I managed to break free from his grip and stepped back, looking at him with a mixture of disappointment and worry.

"Logan, we need to talk," I said firmly, trying to keep my emotions in check."You're drunk again, this is not the time for this, I have something to tell you, why don't you go upstairs and freshen up then come have dinner?" I said as If speaking to a child.

He drew me closer to him immediately, not caring about my words as he placed his familiar and inviting lips on mine, beckoning me to surrender to the moment. I longed for a calm, romantic moment like this, but this was the wrong time.

I was still mourning my mom, at least this was the last respect I was to give to her before she was laid to rest.

He took me off my feet and swooped me up in his arms, in his drunken state.

"Keep me down Logan!" I yelled, trying all I could to get down but he didn't listen, he headed up stairs.

"I am going to fuck you hard tonight." he said as he made his way upstairs.

"I can't Logan not tonight, I am still mourning mum." I countered.

"Yea, that's more reason why I want it now, so you can get your mind off her." he replied as we reached the top.

He pushed open the door to my bedroom, as I gasped at the cold breeze that came from the window which was left open.

He laid me down on the bed, as he stood before me, his eyes burning with desire while he pull off his clothes. I couldn't help but notice the evidence of his arousal.

His groin was erect, as he was standing naked, I laid on the bed, my heart racing I was really confused I didn't know how to resist Logan and refused giving him what he wants, I knew this was going to be a rough night as he was already drunk.

I didn't know how to explain to him that I wasn't in the mood. I immediately tried to get up from the bed to sway him, but as I approached him, he hit my shoulders with both of his hands making me land back on the bed.

"You are mine for the night and you will obey me." he said, his eyes filled with dread and he climbed unto the bed.

I knew I couldn't over power him, so I had to surrender to avoid getting injured.

He immediately ripped off my nightgown the moment he pounced on me leaving me with just my panties on.

"Logan, am sorry, I am not in the mood for this, don't forget I am still mourning my mom at least let's wait till after she has been laid to rest, you can have me however you like." I tried to explain once more with a shaky voice but he didn't listen.

He pinned me to the bed as he shifted my undies to get space to slide his cock into my pussy.

I moaned loudly like I was gasping for air as I felt his long, big cock filling the walls of my pussy.

He began thrusting as soon as he was in me, not caring how I was feeling, he kept on slamming me hard. I moaned in pain, as he was rough on me, almost like he was in another mood.

I kept on enduring every bit of the process, tears streamed down my eyes as I begged him to slow down but he didn't hear me, he was too quick to even listen to my pleas.

I couldn't stop him, all I did was to lay there and receive it all telling myself it was for his pleasure, while I received the pain.

Suddenly he let out a loud moan and fell onto the bed out of exhaustion. I could feel the wet cum on me, as I lay helpless on the bed with my body aching and my lower region burning with heat.

I couldn't help but feel miserable as I laid there.