Chapter 5 Getting Her Grove Back

Arianna

Rushed to my car with no thoughts running through my head, no, that's not right, I have a thought, how in the hell did I let a simple lunch get to that point? Ugh, girl, you need to get a handle on yourself because there is no way you can go back to that man, no matter how good this kiss was, you can't fall for him, not again, yeah, not again. I kept telling myself, well, driving back to Lucia's apartment, at least I did start to believe my lies until I got into the apartment and stared at myself in the mirror to see the evidence of that kiss on my lips, knowing I was done for.

Sliding down on the floor with my back against it, I thought, damn, when did I lose control of the situation, a little voice said, "Did you ever have a handle on the situation?" getting off the floor, I looked at myself and the mirror and say " yes I did, I sure did and I will get back in control" pointing to myself with motivation enough I went back in the kitchen to eat the lunch, there's no reason to thrown it away it didn't do anything wrong to me after all.

Taking a bit out of my sandwich, I thought, damn, if I knew that I would get a melt-my-panties-away kiss, I wouldn't have left the house at all in fact, I would've stayed in bed and drowned in my sorrow with no thought of my soon to be ex-husband. To think that I had such an amazing day started very nicely with me going to Lucia's work with her, where I met her boss, and he interviewed me, and I got myself a part-time job working as an assistant to one of the designers' managers. It's not much, but it's something to start with, and I'm not complaining, since I cut my dad and brother out of my life, I don't have many expenses, so I could live on the little money I make until I could find something better.

To celebrate finding a job, I went on a little shopping spree buying myself all kinds of beautiful dresses and shoes, and of course, I bought some work clothes so I'm not that shallow, it was in the middle of all that I got the text from Jacob to come and meet him at the restaurant for lunch, my first thought when I saw the text was to say hell no, but no instead my hands type sure I'll meet with you while my head is saying no, don't you dare to go. Nah, my fingers had other ideas so did the rest of my body cause right after I finished with my shopping I went straight to the restaurant I was hoping that I would've gotten there before him but of course not, being that he is someone who loves to be on time. So I thought I could control whether or not I could stay and eat my lunch or leave with it, but of course, Mr. Jacob Milian had to show me who was in control by doing something completely different.

Taking my last bite of the bread I thought, you know, today I saw a different side of him because he was never the type to show any emotion when we were together maybe for the first year but after all, I got was a cold and emotionless Jacob, today I got the sweet loving side that I know he as and I haven't seen in a while. Ugh, this is frustrating. I thought I could get a clean break from him, but from the way he was looking at me today, I came to realize that won't be an easy thing; he will make things difficult for me, and whether or not I like it, I'm in this for the long run.

Dropping my lifeless body on the sofa I just stared at the ceiling still thinking about it, touching my lips I could still feel his against mine that brought a smile to my face. " whoever puts that cheese smile on your face deserves a kiss" Lucia said while looking down on me laying on the sofa. Swinging my legs off the floor to get up, I said, "What are you talking about? No one put a smile on my face." I quickly walked past her and rushed towards my room. I didn't want her asking questions.

That didn't stop her anyway. She walked behind me and sat on my bed, looking at me, "What did you do while I was slaving away?"

Slapping my hand on my forehead I say "Oh damn I forgot" quickly walks back out of the house and goes back to my car and starts crabbing the back, I was so lost in my thoughts that I completely forgot about them.

As I walked back into the house, both of my hands filled with bags, Lucia was still in my room, staring at me with wide eyes, like she couldn't believe that I had bought so much stuff.

"Girl, you weren't playing when you said you wanted to go shopping." I'm still looking at my bags. "How much stuff did you buy?"

Looking at the room's floor full of shopping bags, I bit my finger, thinking, Did I go overboard? Shaking my head, no, no, I'm trying to convince myself that I did no such thing, but one look at Lucia tells me everything that I need to know: I sure did go overboard with the shopping. "I bought too much, didn't I?"

"It's not that, it's just," she couldn't finish her sentence, "I mean, did you buy the whole mall girl?" she finally said.

" Oh God, stop making me feel guilty," I say before sitting on the bed with a look of disappointment.

Clapping her hand, she says, " Alright, alright, we're going to have a fashion show. Let me go get some wine, and we'll get going." When she walks out, my phone starts to ring. Picking it up, I see it: Jacob. Ugh, what more those he. Picking up, I say, "Yes, Jacob, what do you want?"

Laughing, " can't I call my wife to see if she made it home safe since she ran out of the restaurant without looking back?"

"Ex-wife," I reminded him, " and besides, there was nothing else for us to talk about." I don't know why he is being a charmer right now.

" Ah right, you want a divorce, I could, I forgot." he stayed quiet for a moment, and I thought about hanging up until he said the one thing that stopped my heart, "What if I don't want a divorce?"

I had to pull the phone away from my ears to make sure I was talking to Jacob Milan because there was no way that he would say something like that, not after everything that happened in our dead marriage; no, he can't be right" Jacob, I don't know what you have been smoking lately, but I want a divorce, and that's finally "I told him before hanging up the phone. And Lucia walks in with a bottle of red wine and two glasses, grabbing it from her. I pour myself a healthy pour because I still can't believe he would say something like that. How dare he say, he might not want one, no, he ain't got no right to say that to me.

"What's going on? I left you for just a minute. Who got you so upset?" she asked while taking a sip of her drink.

" who else" I throw at her " Jacob, he got the nerve to tell me he might not want a divorce" I told her thinking that she might be on my side but instead she goes " from the way that you are getting worked up, I would think you fall for him" stop me dead in my tracks.

" What? Are you crazy? Why would I-i-i?" Somehow, I couldn't bring myself to finish my words. Calmly, I sat a little on the floor, thinking about what she had just said. I mean, yeah, when I first met him, I won't lie, the man did a number on me, and I was all for it until he thought I betrayed him when I miscarried our baby.

I thought I buried those feelings deep somewhere inside me, but now it seems they are coming out, whether I have anything to say about them or not. Do I need to put myself through that rollercoaster of emotions again?

"I'll take it from your silence I'm right," she says with amusement in her eyes.

" Why are you excited about me having feelings for him?"

"It means there is a reason why you want a clean divorce from him. Come on, Arianna. You're my best friend, of course. I know you fall for your soon-to-be ex-husband," she says.

" How is that possible?" I asked, pointing my finger at her. "Don't say anything; I know how."

Smiling, she goes, "Good, now what are you going to do about him?"

Good question, "I'm still going through with the divorce and getting my freedom from the Milian family." They treated me like garbage when I was married to him, and I don't want to go back to that.

" Oh my god!" she yelled excitedly, "I got it you two could start dating after the divorce"

Getting up from my spot, I touched her forehead to make sure she wasn't sick because she was starting to talk nonsense. " nope, no, nope," I told " that's not going to happen" I was trying to make myself believe my own words.

" Of course, you can, but if it's not something you want to do, you don't have to do it," she lets out.

I was thinking about what she was saying, but damn, after all the thoughts that I put into my plan to leave Jacob Milian behind in my, only for him to invade my thoughts and heart. Typical him, he will make sure that you know he is here even when he's not trying, "I need to get myself off the ground before I could even think about dating anyone, let alone having a second chance with Jacob"

"I know that's why I'm saying it's something to think about in the future" she hugged me from behind, we sat like that for a good two hours before I felt my legs where getting cramp, grabbing one of the shopping bags we spend the rest of the day going through them, once we were done we cleaned the room by cleaning my closet from the whole clothes to the new ones.

By the time we were done, we were so beat that we end falling asleep on my bed with each one of us holding an empty bottle of wine in our hands, I mean who says cleaning your room can be fun right? I know I'm going to make the best of whatever the future has for me, and I'm ready to kick its a**; whether it's Jacob, I'm here for it; with a smile, I let myself drift to sleep.