Chapter 1 MOTHER TO A CHILD IN NEED OF A LONG TERM CARE.

Sitting in the cold, unable to feel the breeze against my skin-

a silent sign that something's not right within.

But I don't care. All I want is to be alright.

I thought I found the one, the love I could trust,

but instead, they called me names that weren't mine to bear-

a liar, a cheat, a fake.

They fooled me, starved me even when they were the reason I had nothing.

Now, I stand at a crossroad, unsure what to do-

I cannot die, I must live,

for I have a child depending on me.

I won't let her grow up motherless like I did.

I have to be strong, for her, for us.

Hunger gnaws at me still,

but I breastfeed my child despite the emptiness inside.

It's not her fault I'm hungry-

it's mine alone.

My child is no mistake.

She is my reason to keep going, my light in the dark.

I have to survive.

I need to wake from this nightmare.

I have to live my life,

I have to be...

I just have to stay alive.

So, wake up every morning, nurse my baby,

take her to the daycare center, then go to work-

put on a mask, fake being happy,

smile through the cracks that no one sees.

Inside, the pain still lingers,

a heavy weight pressing down on my chest.

Loneliness wraps around me like a cold fog,

but I swallow it down, because I have to be strong.

I watch other mothers laugh with their children,

and wonder if they see the storm behind my eyes.

No one knows the nights I lie awake,

wondering if I'm enough, if I can carry on.

Every step feels like walking on broken glass,

yet I move forward, for her-my only reason,

the tiny hand that clings to mine,

the soft breath that tells me to keep fighting.

Sometimes I cry in silence,

letting the tears fall only when she's asleep,

so she never knows the battles I face,

so she can believe the world is safe and kind.

But beneath it all, I hold onto hope-

that one day, this pain will fade,

that one day, I'll rise beyond this shadow,

and my child will know a mother who never gave up.

Until then, I breathe, I endure, I love-

because even in the darkest nights,

I have to stay alive.