Chapter 2 how long I can keep holding myself back

The sky was shrouded in gray clouds, and heavy rain poured down, drenching the rows of silent gravestones in the cemetery. Grief hung in the air, clinging to everyone dressed in black and dark glasses. Among them, Rachel stood tall-her body trembling, yet she didn't move. She clenched her fists tightly, struggling to contain the storm of emotion threatening to erupt.

Even as others began to leave her father's grave, Rachel remained. Her eyes were fixed on David's freshly placed headstone. Her heart felt colder than the rain that soaked her skin. Her world had collapsed. She had lost the only person who had ever loved her unconditionally.

But David hadn't left her empty-handed. He had given her one final gift-someone he believed could protect her: Lucian.

The man stood two steps behind her, silent as ever. He didn't dare hold an umbrella over her-only stayed close in quiet companionship. When Rachel finally staggered, her body weakened by grief and unrelenting rain, Lucian was quick to catch her.

"I'm fine," Rachel whispered, gently pulling away from his hold and turning to walk away from her father's grave. She knew this wasn't the end of her life. It was the beginning of a new chapter-one her father had asked her to face with strength.

Lucian opened the car door for her and soon took the driver's seat. Rachel didn't look at him once. She kept her eyes on the rain sliding down the window, as if avoiding the truth that the man beside her was now her husband-even if only in name.

When they arrived at the grand house that now felt unbearably empty, Rachel was about to step inside when Lucian's voice stopped her.

"In that case, I'll be leaving now."

For the first time since the funeral began, Rachel spoke to him.

"Where are you going?"

"To my apartment."

"You don't agree with Daddy's request?" Rachel asked, lowering her sunglasses, her gaze cutting through him.

"I don't have the right to refuse his request," Lucian replied softly.

"Then why won't you stay here? Isn't that what Daddy wanted?" she said, this time with more certainty.

Lucian froze. He hadn't expected Rachel to ask him to stay. He had assumed the marriage was just for her father's sake. He thought she would send him away the moment David passed. But he was wrong.

"I was afraid it might be inappropriate."

"You're supposed to live with me, aren't you? But I won't force you if you don't wish to honor this arrangement. If you're uncomfortable, you can tell me now," Rachel said, her voice firm. But again, Lucian shook his head.

"I have no such intentions. I accepted his request with an open heart," Lucian replied, assuring her that he wasn't fulfilling David's wish out of obligation.

"In that case, good. I don't have to feel guilty for letting you stay," Rachel said. She turned again to open the large door in front of her, but once more, Lucian stopped her.

"But for now, I need to return to my apartment," Lucian said, prompting Rachel to look back at him again. Before she could speak, Lucian continued, offering his explanation before she misunderstood.

"I need to collect my belongings before moving into this house. That's why I'm asking your permission," Lucian said respectfully-like a secretary speaking to a boss-leaving Rachel speechless for a moment. Then she nodded silently, and Lucian returned the gesture.

He waited until Rachel entered the house before driving away to retrieve his things-ready to begin their new, uncertain life under the same roof.

As the door creaked open, David's scent welcomed her. It was still the same, as if he had never left. Rachel stepped in slowly, her fingers brushing over her father's favorite chair before she sat down. Her hand traced the edge of his desk, now neatly arranged with files and a laptop-everything untouched.

And there, in the stillness of that room, Rachel finally broke down. The tears she had held back since the funeral now flowed freely. Her sobs filled the study-one of the last places where she could still feel close to David.

"I miss you, Dad. I love you," she whispered. Rachel wept uncontrollably, hugging her father's desk as if she could embrace the man who was no longer there. She remembered all the dreams they once wove together-of a joyful marriage, a small happy family, and grandchildren to brighten David's old age.

But those dreams had become nothing more than memories. David had left too soon, leaving Rachel with just one final wish-that Lucian would take care of her.

"I'm sorry, Dad. I failed. I couldn't hold back these tears..."

It took a long time for Rachel to let her sorrow spill completely. She no longer had the strength to even sit upright. She leaned against the desk, letting the memories of David wash over her.

Her childhood moments flashed before her eyes, offering the smallest comfort. Her father's warm smile slowly soothed the pain in her heart, until her eyes grew heavy and everything went dark. The beautiful memories of her time with him gently lulled her to sleep.

Minutes passed in silence before the door creaked again. Lucian, still drenched from the rain, stepped inside and quietly approached her. He draped a warm blanket over Rachel's delicate frame, her body now seeming so fragile.

"I'm only following his wish... but I don't know how long I can keep holding myself back," Lucian murmured softly, brushing his hand over her head.