Chapter 4 Fractured Silence

The moon managed only to knock the tops of trees aside as Lila forged through into shadows. The sound of a twig snapping underfoot sent the well-honed reflexes that should have saved her jumping up and down like gymnasts in her gut. Her heart rate increased and her breath grew short as she raced through memories of Lucas the sweet to sour whispers in dark corners, love molded into chains.

She was lost in thought when suddenly a voice boomed through the darkness.

"Lila! Is that you?" Lucas and his voice was filled with urgency. She felt panic run through her bloodstream. With a hesitant pause, she glanced back at the direction where Jaden had gone and followed her heart as it pounded from within her chest.

"Lila!" He sounded closer now. "Please! Don't run away!"

Under her breath she swore, anger was coated in fear. "What do you want, Lucas? I'm not going back!"

"I just want to talk!" The way he said it, so quietly and almost beseeching. I never intended for it to be like this.

"Talk? Whenever we spoke I just felt like a caged animal!" She tried to speak without her voice shaking. You no longer get to decide what I need.

A rustle came from behind, and she whirled to look into the black. "Lila, please!" It settled into her resolve, a creeping question of his voice among the trees.

"Why should I believe you?" She shot back, digging in to be strong. You think sweet nothings were going to make everything better.

"I can change!" Then, a hint of desperation coloured his voice. "I swear I can. Just let me explain!"

"Explain what? How you manipulated me? How you could turn every kind memory into a gun? She clenched her fists, biting back tears.

"I " He faltered. A thick, brooding silence lay between them. "I was scared, Lila. I remember it as, Well... when I see you talk to other people ... It just burns me up that we both want this [, ughest]- thing and youre over there conducting a symphony like nothing else even matters.

"Protect? You call that protection, I called it control!" With a shake of her head, anger vibed in every way she moved. "This isn't love, Lucas. It's suffocation."

"Please! Just wait!" He asked, some panic in his voice. "We can fix this together! I'll change, I promise!"

You say that all the time. she asked, taking a step back her heart racing. You never changed, and you always said that the next time it will be different.

The darkness changed and she thought he stepped out of the shadows closer. Lila, I am still that person you loved. That hasn't changed."

"No, you're not!" she countered fiercely. There is no more that person. "okay, well you have once again proven to me who the hell I thought you were... and trust that I will not allow myself to be subjected to such hideous lies from a coward like yourself ever again..."

'But I love you,' he choked out, in a strained voice. "You know that!"

Lila stopped, her heart twisting with the words she used to beg for. "Love doesn't hurt, Lucas. It does not bind one or instill fear. You would understand why I need to go if you loved me

Now I could see his silhouette, and a glimpse of pain across the light from the moon on his face. "Whatever it is you are going to do, Lila. You don't have to go solo. We can fix it together! Just give me a chance!"

C.j asking for more opportunities to see who she is "i need a chance to find me first" ( ohgirltype) Not when you're standing there watching and just waiting for me to finish falling so can pretend like nothing ever happened.

"Then come back with me. He implored, with desperation in his words "We can wipe the slate clean. "I'll do anything!"

Lila sucked in air, drawing strength from the burden of his words. "Anything? If you really meant that, You would set me free. Do you even hear yourself?"

For a moment, Lila waited with Lucas as he struggled inside himself to become someone else or surrender. " I ... just cannot bring back myself to lose you," he admitted, his voice cracking.

It was the first time she had spoken since their confrontation in her prison, and even now Jeret could clearly hear every icy word his dreams bring to him still: 'You already did when you tried to control me. I can never return to those shadows. I won't."

The quiet that followed was big with noise. She could feel the tension stretching tight thin, and with it she felt her last few strands of connectivity unwind. Another step and she would be gone between those trees if only she could find the strength within to reach it.

Lila... A whisper on those almost too kissable lips. " Lila...it..." His voice shook "Please don't go."

Her voice was steady Type 0 (or whatever number she knew in Arabella Prisca) I'm sorry Lucas, fighting for something that's already shattered Lila said using her American accent.

"Please, just one more," he pleaded closing in on desperation "I'll show you I can. I promise!"

She shook her head, tears dripping from her eyelids. "You't understand. Ideally not promises anymore. It's about trust. "Damn thing is broken. shattered it too many times."

"What if I seek help? Is not that a sign I mean business? He looked at her with an urgent desperation in his eyes.

Lila broke a pained heart. "It's not just you, Lucas. I need to heal, too. I am not someone who can catch you when we are both still crashing to the ground.

He made a step and, taking her hand, begged;.."

"No," she said firmly. I have to reclaim my energy first. You have to respect that."

He was torn and the hurt in his eyes said as much, but her resolve were undeniable. "I can't do this anymore. I deserve to be free."

But I love you, he whispered again in a voice that cracked.

"I know," she said softly. That's why I gotta leave.

In her eyes last glance, she turned round and then departed walking into the shadows as he stood there against the moonlit night now vanishing silhouette. []