Chapter 6 DID I MAKE A MISTAKE

IRIS' POV

Everything began to change soon after the wedding. Julian became very cold and

distant. He began to spend more time at work and when he came home, he slept in a

guest room and not the room we shared.

It was as though the Julian that had courted me and the man I had married ceased to

exist. He was now cold. Whenever I spoke, he brushed me aside and it hurt a lot. I spent most nights wondering where it had all gone wrong, how everything had gone from being rosy to being a total mess. I missed him, but I was beginning to resent him.

One night I stayed up to wait for him to get back from work so I could confront him

about how he had been acting. I had never been a confrontational person, I usually

avoided situations like this, but I was married to the man, and I knew if I didn't know what was going on I would just lose my mind thinking about it.

It was well past midnight when I heard him coming up the stairs. I got out of my bed

and opened the door just as he had gotten to the top floor.

"Hello." I greeted him.

"Hey." He muttered in his usual cool tone and was about to walk past me to his

bedroom when I stopped him.

"I am sorry to bother you, but we need to talk," I said strongly.

He had a bored expression on his face. "Can't this wait till tomorrow? I have just gotten back from a very long day at work, and I am tired."

A part of me wanted to be understanding and let it go till tomorrow, but I knew if I

did, I would lose my zeal to say what I had in mind.

"I'm sorry, but it cannot," I told him, causing a frustrated sight to leave his mouth.

"Okay. What's it about?"

I had not thought this through enough to know how I would even start the

conversation so I simply said the first thing that came to my mind.

"You've changed. Why is that?" I let out simply. There was no need to beat around the bush about it.

"Changed? What are you talking about?" I knew he was playing dumb, he knew

exactly what I was talking about, but I decided not to mention that fact.

"Yes. Why don't you spend the night with me anymore? And you hardly talk to me

anymore." My voice was now shaking with all the emotions I had been feeling for the

past two weeks that I had been trying to keep at bay.

"Because I am busy, and I like to have my own space." His voice was cold, and I knew

that I would only hurt myself more if I continued with this conversation or said

anything more.

So, I just stared at him trying to read his face, searching for any answers. I got nothing.

He cleared his throat and then spoke. "Will that be all?"

"Yes," I said. He turned and left without a single hesitation.

I went back into my room, and I broke down in tears. It was my fault for rushing into

the marriage, I should have waited and investigated him a bit more before making a

lifetime commitment to him.

I imagined my life in a loveless marriage to a cold and distant man and I knew I had

made the worst mistake of my life. I could not even tell my family about it. They had

been so excited about the joining of two powerful families, that I just couldn't let them

down. This was my fate, and I knew I had to deal with it.

That night I vowed to myself that I would keep to myself and stay as far away from

Julian as possible. I might be stuck in this marriage, but I most certainly was not going

to beg for love and one day when the time was right, I would leave.

***

JULIAN'S POV

When I got into my room, I let out a huge sigh and tried to ignore the heavy feeling of

guilt in my chest. I knew I had married Iris for all the wrong reasons, I also knew she

didn't deserve any of the treatment that she was getting from me, but it was for her good and mine.

I could not allow myself to fall in love with her and the possibility of that happening

was high with her. I was not cut out for it, especially not after what happened the last

time.

It had taken me a very long time to get over losing my wife. It had hurt and it took

everything in me to pick myself back up again. I didn't even think I had it in me to love anybody the way I had loved her and losing her had shattered me. I only lived because of my daughters, I fought to come out of the horrible pit of depression for the sake of my girls. They had lost their mother, there was no reason for them to lose their father too.

I remembered what it was like when my mom died and how my dad had changed

completely towards me. I didn't want my children to experience that. I knew I was not

home alone, but I always tried to make time for them.

The image of Iris' defeated face came to mind, and I felt that stab of guilt again. Iris was a lovely girl, and she was extremely gorgeous, it had taken all of my willpower to remain stoic as she stood in front of me in her transparent nightwear and her luscious black hair that was messily pushed to the side and to stop myself from pressing a kiss to her soft, pink, plum lips that were calling out to me.

I shook the thoughts from my head as I felt myself getting aroused. That was exactly

why I needed to stay away from her, she was dangerous. A disaster that was waiting to

happen. One I could not afford to happen.

I went into the bathroom to take a cold shower, an attempt to cure my mind of the

perverted thoughts I was harboring towards my new wife.

I blamed myself for this whole thing-I could have married any woman that I wanted.

One that I wasn't attracted to, but instead I let my desires win and I went after the one

woman that set a fire in me and ignited a passion within me that I had not felt for any

woman in a long time.

When I finally got into my bed that night, I could not sleep. The guilt that I had been

able to bury came back up to the surface. I felt like the worst possible person in the

world, but it was too late to go back now.