Chapter 10 I Don't Envy You

"I don't envy you right now," Derby said as she saw me scavenging through several files on my desk

I looked up at her, a wry smile cut on my lips. "Me and you both"

Derby leaned against the edge of my desk her brow furrowed in concern "Is there a way I can help?" I have noticed you always end up doing most of the work and yet you never receive any recognition for your effort."

I shrugged, trying to downplay the situation. "It's all good, Derby. I'm sure they see how much of an asset I can be so they are trying to harness that."

Derby's eyes narrowed slightly and I could tell she wasn't buying my forced optimism. "So what got you so worked up now? I thought you had everything all under control," she pressed

"I thought I did but no matter what I present to him, it never gets approved. It's just so frustrating." I complained as I sat on my chair, and before I knew it, tears started gushing from my eyes

Derby didn't utter a word, she just placed a gentle hand on my shoulder and that was the trigger for my lamenting

"I have dedicated my heart and soul to this project, worked late nights, and even missed out on moments with those who matter most to me. Yet what do I get in return? Rejection without explanation. There is always that mounting pressure to prove to everyone that I am just as good as anyone else here. Sometimes it gets too much to handle. I feel like I am always caught between a rock and a hard place with the onus of meeting unrealistic expectations and stuck on the vicious cycle of being overworked and without recognition." I cried

"I can only imagine how you feel, Sophie. But remember your worth shouldn't be measured by external validation. You're strong, capable, and resilient and I see you," Derby said soothingly

"Thanks for giving me a listening ear. I've been keeping it all inside, with nobody to pour my heart to. I'm glad you checked on me today because I almost lost my mind." I said wiping my tears

"I will always be here whenever you need an ear to vent to and a shoulder to cry on," she said her voice filled with empathy

"What would I have done without you?" I teased forcing a smile

Just before Derby could say anything, Mia strode in, her face twisted in a sneer

"Well, well, look who got the boss's attention," she said her voice dripping with sarcasm

"Mia, I'm not in the mood for your drama." I snapped

As if she had just noticed Derby, her face turned even more sour

"What's going on here? Why are you in this godforsaken place and when did both of you become this close?" Mia asked all at once

"Nothing that concerns you, Mia. I was just saying hi to a colleague and I don't see how that's a problem." Derby replied her voice calm and composed

Mia scoffed crossing her arms over her chest

"Funny how everybody is warming up to you," she sneered

"What exactly is that supposed to mean?" I managed to ask, my nerves on the edge

"Oh, come on, Sophie. You can't seriously be naïve, Mia sneered. "We both know the real reason you wouldn't get this project right."

"And what reason would that be, Mia?

"Mia's lips curled into a sardonic smile. "Please, don't play innocent with me. I see beneath all this. There's no way you can't get a single thing right."

I cleared my throat trying to maintain my calm. "Mia, I'm not sure what you believe is happening but-"

"I'm well aware of the situation," Mia cut in sharply her tone filled with bitterness. "You're using this project to get close to him, and you're not even trying to hide it. That's why you always give him something not up to standard

"Mia" Derby called out her voice firm."That's enough. I thought we were all making jokes about his looks the day he came in never thought you would take it this far to the extent of laying accusation."

I finally found my voice though it came out shaky. "All you said isn't true, Mia. I have been working my ass out for this project and I have no personal agenda.

"Mia rolled her eyes dramatically. "Oh, please. Don't insult my intelligence. You can fool him or even Derby about being too good but I know the real you. I can sense the pretense from a mile away."

Derby stepped forward putting herself between Mia and me. "Mia, you have said enough. If you have any genuine concern about her work ethics then take it up to the proper channel. Until then let her breathe. This is insane."

Mia's squinted her eyes appearing as though she might keep the drama going. However, she eventually let out a frustrated huff and stormed off, muttering under her breath.

I let out a breath sensing the tension in my shoulders somehow fading away. "Thank you, Derby."

Derby turned to me, her expression softening. "You're welcome but you need to learn to stand up for yourself and you don't owe anybody who isn't your boss any explanation on how you carry out your duties here."

I nodded, and then I got a beep on my notification signaling a message from Alex

"Make sure to be in my office by 8 am." The message read

"Noted," I replied

The day was finally here and I could barely keep it together. I tossed and turned all night, my night racing with a million different scenarios of how this meeting with Alex could go down. I couldn't even stomach the thought of breakfast.

When 8 am rolled around I slowly made my way to Alex's office praying and hoping he would finally acknowledge my hard work and not tear me down,

I lightly tapped on the door but didn't get a response. I waited anxiously shifting my weight from one foot to the other, checking the clock repeatedly unsure if he would even show up

It wasn't until 8:35 that Alex finally came in, his expression unreadable

"Good morning, Mr Hernandez." I greeted, putting on the best brave face I could muster

"Morning, Sophie," he replied. Come in after five minutes

"He must have known he'd be late." I thought to myself, feeling annoyed. "Why would he tell me to be here at 8 am if he wasn't even going to show up? To frustrate me, I guess."

At exactly 8:40 am I knocked on the door. "Come in," he called out

Before I could even say anything he dropped the bombshell "I have decided to go with the proposal you sent via email."

I stared at him completely dumbfounded. "I-I don't understand. But you said it wasn't good enough. You made me work day and night on this and now you're telling me you would go for the one I sent earlier?

"I know what I said about the proposal and I'm very much aware of what I am saying to you right now." He replied, his gaze unwavering

No, you don't get it! You wasted my time, my energy, my effort - all for what? So you could just turn around and say this? I felt like screaming, but I couldn't bring myself to speak. Considering he was my superior, I had to maintain my composure despite feeling frustrated

"So this is useless?" I asked, lifting the file I was holding

But Alex simply turned his back, leaving me standing there utterly frustrated and boiling with anger. "Say something damn it" I screamed in my head but I didn't get any response. I turned to leave but just as I was about to reach for the door, he spoke up

"The client can't make it to the office today for the first review so we will be going to them. Be ready by 1 pm and meet me at the parking lot."