Chapter 3 III

Richard's POV

My arms tremble, shaking with the willpower not to break down. I sniffle hoping it will at least grant me the strength to get the hell out of here.

Forcing my head up, I use the seatbelt and ignite the car engine into action. I noticed my hands are still trembling.

For a second, I consider calling a cab to come pick me up instead of driving so I won't end up driving into a pole as a result of this shock but I can't wait here.

I drive out immediately.

The more seconds I spend here the more risk. I might end up doing something rash like storming back into that apartment and breaking Jake's jaws.

Not only that.

The things I want to do to Eve includes slapping her face severally till she begs me for forgiveness.

The thought of her cheating all along causes me nothing but aches. To think I thought she was worth it all. She isn't.

This means she had been sleeping with that traitor all along. No wonder he came back from God knows where just a few days ago. Who knows if they were in London together all along while I was here maltreating Arabel, and even asking her for a divorce just because of someone who wasn't worth it?

I don't know if I am hurt from what I just saw or from what I said to Arabel an hour ago about getting divorced.

I saw the hurt flash across her expression but I chosed to ignore it because I wanted to be selfish for once in my life.

All my life, I have done things for people's happiness. I studied business because that was what my father wanted me to study so I could take over the family business.

I went to England to study because that was my mother's choice.

After graduation, I was forced to go back for my Masters simply because I couldn't take over with just a BA degree.

When Father died, Mother became the one to decide every single thing in my life. Then she brought up Arabella and her choice for her to be my wife.

I was in a relationship with Eve so I kicked against it. She burst into tears, talking about how lonely she had been since Father died and how sweet of a woman Arabel was, which made me feel guilty.

To me, it felt like she wanted Arabel for me so she could be her companion. I had seen Arabel on one or two occasions in our family home in Boston.

I didn't know how I managed to give in to her demands but I know I did and regretted it for a long time because of Eve. I didn't know how to explain myself to her. I didn't want to hurt her. I didn't want to tell her we were done.

So I explained everything to her. I told her it was just for a while. I told her Arabel would be gone in a year. But she chose to leave. She decided to go to London to further her studies.

A year turned into two and then three. And now she was back.

Then I felt it was time to let Arabel go.

The car jerk forward suddenly, forcing me to pull the car to a stop, my head resting on the wheels.

No!

What will I do now? What should I tell my mother? What do I tell Arabel?

Tears are threatening to spill but I force them back. I won't let her make me cry. She isn't worth it at all.

She is nothing but a cheat and a bitch.

My heart is in turmoil, yet, I sit upright and start the car again, this time slowly till I get home, thinking of what excuse they would both give for their actions.

Eve would use the fact that I was married while we were in a relationship as an excuse while Jake would pretend as if he never knew we were together despite my married status.

He knew.

In fact, he was among those who advised me to go ahead with the marriage. He suggested getting a divorce after a year and I thought of it as a nice idea, until reality knocked.

After I was married, I realized still dating Eve meant I was cheating but I kept telling myself it was Eve I loved not Arabel and I was in that marriage for my Mother's sake.

Just yesterday, Eve and I almost had sex. This was the reason why I had to hasten up the divorce process.

Asking Arabel for a divorce was enough heartbreak. I didn't want to add cheating to my list of offences so I told her to be patient till I was done divorcing Arabel.

Was it because we didn't have sex? How long have they been together?

No matter how much I want to forget the fleeting image of those two, it keeps appearing.

For a moment, I force myself to stop thinking about them, filling my head with the thought of Arabel and how exactly I am supposed to change the course of events. What exactly I am supposed to say to her when I get home is what I don't get.

I know I am supposed to apologize but what else will I say afterwards? I don't want us to be divorced anymore. What if she asks me why?

I know how much she adores me. She is a lovely woman. Kind. And sweet. She is also understanding. I'm sure she won't take it to heart. All I need to do is hug her and tell her I don't mean it.

Perhaps, I should tell her it is all a trick.

The quilt settles at the pit of my stomach. I am indeed selfish.

I wanted out because of Eve and now that I found her cheating, I no longer want to divorce Arabel.

As I approach home, I manage to keep calm and ball my fist to stop myself from venting my anger on the wheels.

As soon as the car is parked in the garage, I step out weakly as an angry sigh leaves my mouth. No matter how hard I try to wave it away, the scene keeps racing through my head and my heart keeps hurting.

It hurts like hell to be betrayed by Eve of all people. I waited for three goddamn years to have her back to me and this is all I get.

Realizing my intent on coming back home instead of going to a club to drown my sorrows with alcohol is because of Arabel, I shake my head intermittently, walking slowly towards the entrance of our house.

Our matrimonial home.

The butler throws the door open and I enter without replying to his greetings like I usually do. Instead of going over to her room, I hesitate a little, the guilt from earlier washing over me once more.

I drag my hand over my face, exhaling a breath before striding towards her room.

Arabel and I haven't been sharing a room. From the onset, I made rules which she stuck to firmly. One of those rules is having separate rooms. My mother was against it at first but when I didn't give in, she stopped pestering me about it.

But two months ago, something happened. She slept in my room, on my bed and in my arms. I don't know what came over me or how it happened. It just happened and I think that gave her the impression that I was beginning to fall head over heels in love with her.

I can't love two women at a time, can I?

Honestly, I was confused when it happened. But my firm resolution on coming back to Eve made me throw caution to the winds about what happened between us.

When I get to the door, I knock slightly and wait, expecting the door to be thrown open immediately.

There is no reply.

Is she crying?

I move close to hear if she is crying her eyes out because of what I said earlier but I can't hear anything.

With a brow raised and my heart beating twice its normal rate just like it has been pounding since I got to her door, I knock again. This time, it is louder and I know she will definitely hear the knock this time.

A second passes and the door does not open.

A minute passes and I am met with silence. Without hesitation, I open the door to her room and then step in, glancing around for the sight of her.

I halt in my step when I see the open closet which is completely empty. My eyes open more widely as I rush forward in confusion.

What the hell happened? Where did she go?

Panic strikes me at the thought of Arabel gone.

I get to the closet and it is still empty. Twirling around and hoping this is a prank, my eyes instantly fall on the document on her bed.

The divorce papers.

I grab it and open the page immediately to see her signature on it already. Just before the document leaves my hand in extreme shock, a sheet of paper falls to the ground.

Quickly, I pick it up and I see the two words which shatter my very existence as the heavy reality of her absence dawns on me.

"Thank you. Goodbye."