Chapter 4 Down on Her Luck

Rainey

I walked back to the living room as if I hadn't sneaked a taste.

"What's Dad up to today?" I asked, opening the next box of decorations. Tinsel burst from the stuffed box and I tried to untangle it.

"He's checking some job." Mom snapped her fingers and I looked up at her. She mimed swiping her hand over her hair.

I did the same and realized I had a chunk of lasagna in my hair. Busted. I smiled at her and tied my hair up into a messy bun. It was always in my face. I needed a cut and coloring really bad, but that wasn't in the budget this month.

She rolled her eyes. "You never could wait."

"It's so good, though, Mom."

"Well, you know how your father is with leftovers. I need to give it to someone."

Dad hated leftovers. It was a repeated argument in their house. At least Tanner and I would benefit from Dad's pickiness. Though I had an idea she made two lasagnas instead of one, knowing we would be able to eat it for a few days.

"Can I have some too?" Tanner asked. He was a scrawny kid, but he could eat more than me. And he did on a regular basis.

"No, we're saving that for dinner," I said.

He stuck out his little bottom lip.

"But if you're hungry, you can have a snack," I amended.

"Cookies!" Tanner pumped his fists in the air and hopped over the ornament box and ran into the kitchen.

"No more than two!" I laughed and resumed his ornament-hanging duties.

"Any luck on the job front?" Mom asked now that Tanner was out of the room. The kid was like a sponge and repeated everything he heard. I didn't need him to say anything at school about my work situation. Or worse, to Killian.

I picked out one of the more fragile ornaments, a large red and green ball, and hung it close to the top.

"I found a job this morning that looks pretty good. And I'm qualified. I'm going to check on it Monday." Nerves raced through the center of my chest. Another job interview, another try, another possible failure.

"Well you just graduated in May so don't worry if you can't get something."

"Mom, I do worry," I said honestly. I expected bigger things for myself at twenty-nine. And for six months I'd been working my ass off to find a good job. "I'm not twenty-one and fresh out of college. I have a kid and I need to find my own place."

"You and Tanner are always welcomed here," Mom said. "For as long as you need to get on your feet."

"I know. And I'm so grateful for you taking care of Tanner while I was at school and offering this apartment when you could be making money off a tenant."

Mom waved a dismissive hand. "Don't listen to your father. We don't need the money, and I'm happy to have my daughter and grandson so close to us. It's every mother's dream to keep her family close.

It wasn't my dream, though. Since the divorce, my life had been in a tailspin. I thought after getting married and having a child, my life would be complete. A cheating husband put a wrench in that. And since I didn't want Tanner around someone who had a drinking habit to boot, I didn't have much help other than my parents.

"Besides, I know you're a hard-worker and none of this would have happened if Killian would have been honest with you."

"Mom," I warned.

She put up her hands defensively. "I'm done."

She knew it was a sore subject for me. And with Tanner in the other room, I didn't want him to know what his dad did to us. Even if Killian was a shitty husband, he was good with Tanner. At least when I was around. Since the divorce, Killian has only had supervised visits with our son.

"Anyway," I said, desperate for some positivity. "It's an assistant job to a real estate mogul. I could get some experience while building relationships with clients. I'm actually excited about it and I'm hoping they will let me interview last minute."

"I'm sure you will do fine. You were always good with interviews."

Yeah, I thought, I'm not so good about getting the jobs.

"What are you going to wear?" Mom asked.

I shrugged. "I have that pantsuit." I'd bought it on clearance at a department store a year ago. It was a little big in some areas, but I couldn't afford to get something tailored.

Mom sidestepped the tree and placed both hands on her thin waist. "You're still wearing that hideous thing?"

"Mom!"

"Well, it is! I'm taking you shopping tomorrow to find something more professional." She looked me up and down. "And something that fits."

I sighed. "No, you've done enough."

"Think of it as an early Christmas present," she said.

"I don't want any more charity. I'm so much in debt with you it's not funny."

"Fine," she said. "I'll loan you the money and you repay me when you get the job."

"With interest," I said, not backing down.

"Absolutely not," she said as if I'd insulted her.

I smiled, a little giddy to go shopping for myself. I hadn't been in quite some time, and I loved hanging out with my mom for sure. "Deal."

She picked up another ornament and held it in front of her. "Now about your hair." She wasn't holding back today.

"What about it?"

"I know you like to wear it down, but maybe for this interview, I think you should wear it back. You'll look smarter and accentuate your eyes." She wagged her eyebrows.

I rolled said eyes and knelt down next to the box of ornaments. I grabbed the small box of hooks to find a new one. "Mom, it's an interview. The last thing I want is some guy's attention. Seriously."

"Rainey, I know you hate when people put attention on them, but they are absolutely gorgeous. Embrace what God gave you."

As a child, the other kids made fun of my honey-brown eyes. They were different and kids had a way of exploiting unique qualities in order to bring others down. It wasn't until after high school that I started to be okay with them. Killian had a way of complimenting them several times a day, which made falling for him so much easier. Sorrow raced through my heart, and I couldn't help but reach up and rub my chest. Even after all the shit he'd put me through, there was some small part of me that wanted things to work out. Mostly for Tanner, but it was there nevertheless. I needed to get my mind on something else.

"So you're saying the reason I haven't gotten a job already is because of my clothes and wearing my hair down?"

"Well, it couldn't hurt to change something after being in a rut. Though I think blame mostly falls on that outfit."

She was right. I needed something to change. I was nervous that I didn't have an appointment for the interview on Monday. I hoped by going into the office early Monday morning I'd be able to show my dedication and persistence. It was something that Mr. Carrington admired. At least that's what the article about him in the New York Times had said. It was worth a shot and I had nothing to lose since I was already close to rock-bottom.