Chapter 2 No.2

Zendaya's POV

Whatever they added into the burger I ate definitely had some form of high pill in it. The zeal that got me off the chair I sat on in the lunchroom, and had me packing my bags to prepare for home, all abandoned me when I got into the car.

Almost like I had an epiphany; what the hell, Daya? I slammed my head on the steering in frustration. One thing I forgot to mention is how much that bastard's demeanor intimidates me. You would think he studied psychology in college, or probably did for real.

Asher's whole expression is to make the other person feel small and closed in. And if I would be sincere to myself, he has that effect on me too.

Come on, girl! You can do this!

This is why I should really consider some yoga classes, to enable some adequate control of my nerves. Cause why the hell are my palms sweaty and my breath keeps hitching? Especially when I'm not standing in his presence yet.

"Okay, just relax." I reminded myself loudly, "All I need to do is tell him how annoying and infuriating his whoring lifestyle is, and how he's ruining my life, and that's all."

There was also a need to keep it in mind, that it is essential to keep a straight face and not allow him get to me. Bowing my head, I counted fifty to one and it worked like magic. I was back to breathing normally.

I think I should really see a doctor at this point; I might be prone to have panic attacks. This crazy being called a husband might drive me off the cliff someday.

A husband whom I hated with everything in me, mind you.

Driving into the compound, I kept repeating the words to myself. Trying to master them, my heart picked up on another circle of race the moment I neared the large house.

Call me ancient, but I would have just love a condo in an environment filled with trees and flowers. Not to forget some peace and quiet. I hated this space where everywhere is swamped with so many people who intend to help you with everything.

They wouldn't mind wiping your ass if you asked them.

"Let me help you with that ma'am." One of the maids In the house offered, rushing towards me as I got out of the car.

I held out a hand, "you don't need to worry. I've got it."

She had a look of disappointment on her face and it did nothing but amused me.

"Go rest somewhere, girl!" I murmured as I waved her off.

Taking a deep breath; I decided to stay put in the sitting room. Knowing myself, I might cower into my fear and decide against confronting him if I go to my room. I haven't even had a second to myself when the maids swamped me to ask; what I would like to have. Deciding I might as well relax, I ordered a chilled glass of iced tea.

That should do.

Sipping on my drink, I clinked on the side of the glass with my manicured nails to keep my anxiety at bay. All of this luxuries would have been enjoyable if I was with the man I love.

My train of thoughts halted when he walked in. I inhaled deeply, almost swallowing my heart along.

This is it, Zendaya!

The surprise on his face was obvious; the only time we have collided in the sitting room are on evenings where there are scheduled occasions we needed to attend, and the last official gathering we both attended, had been weeks ago. Aside from that, I really can't recollect the last time I saw him in person.

And we both live in the same house.

"It's good that you are back early. I was waiting for you." I began, shocked at the stiffness in my voice. I held his gaze and kept talking to prevent him from diffusing my boldness. But, he beat me to it.

With a blank look on his face, Asher unbuttoned his suit jacket and sat on one of the couches, crossing his leg.

"This had better be quick." He gruffed out, voice chilling and firm.

Gulping nervously, I squared my shoulder, "I need you to keep your playboy attitude on a low, please. It's bad enough that a married man and the president of a country shamelessly sleeps around. But, I am the one at the receiving end of the insult and mockery. It's a different mold of embarrassment each day and I can't take it anymore. I have become a laughing stock everywhere, people blame me like it's my fault that you don't have an ounce of control and shame in you."

Exhaling, I clasped my hands together, holding it up against my front.

"Please, for my sanity and reputation, keep your escapades in check. Be more secretive, I can't take this anymore."

His long silence had me feeling victorious inside of me; he definitely is going to have a change of heart, judging from the blank emotion in his eyes. He has probably come to realize that he really shouldn't be sleeping around so openly.

"You must be delusional." Asher said to my utmost shock as he stood up, glaring deep into my soul. "Do you know how petty you sound right now? It's your audacity for me. What right do you think you possess to talk to me the way you want or make a request of me?"

I licked my dry lips, my eyes darting around the room for an escape. I could sense the maids hiding in corners to hear our conversation. Asher sure knows how to put up a show, and how to put me in my place, that is.

"Be more secretive. I have become a public joke. Blah, blah, blah." He spat out in a high voice, mocking me without hesitation. "To think you have the guts to stand in my face and lie about things that aren't true to begin with. Just to gain attention from me, hm? How pathetic can you be?"

He took two strides towards me, everything I wanted to say got stuck in my throat. "Your problem is; you can't stand the fact that those women have me and you don't. You are just jealous. And I don't care." A dry laugh escaped his lips as he walked away. "So pathetic."

Hot tears streamed down my face as I tried to hold my breath together. Turning my head to the back, the helps and maids all scurried off. They had obviously been listening in. Gasping shakily, I grabbed my bag and ran off to my room. Shutting the door tightly behind me.

My lips shook as the tear dam opened up, pouring out. I have never been so humiliated all my life. As much as I hate to admit it; Asher was right about me being pathetic. That bastard stood right in front of me and called me all sorts of names. While accusing me of lying. But my miserable self stood there and did nothing to defend myself.

Not thinking, I stood up searching through my things, when I caught sight of a blade, I held it to my wrist, staring at myself in the vanity mirror.

"You know you don't want to. Stop being foolish." A voice that sounded like Asher's mocked me.

I threw the blade away as I fell to the ground, pulling at my hair. I am not just a coward, but a weak, pathetic and miserable being. Ending my life would be the best thing to do, but then I can't even slit my wrist in peace any longer.

I hate it here so much.

Burying my face InBetween my knees, I screamed loudly till I couldn't feel my voice anymore. My room was sound proofed so I was sure the sounds wouldn't be escaping these four walls.

I hate Asher Smith! I hate him with every depth of me. I am never going to forgive him for putting me through this.

My shoulders shook heavily as the tears kept coming nonstop, it feels like there is no end to this. I hate this world I am living in.