Chapter 5 VANESSA

Rowan paced around his office table taking in the whole fucked up shit I just spilled to him. I told him everything that happened since yesterday, not forgetting to exclude some of the parts where Leo had quarrelled with me as if I was at fault all alone and where Adrian had me in choke-hold from almost kicking him on his crotch.

"Has your dad gone mad? Is he out of his fucking mind? How can he do this? Hasn't he gotten enough money already now that he's involved you in this dirty mess?" He retorted, pushing his arms forwards in blank air out of frustration. I felt that too, he was getting frustrated from just listening to it, and I was dealing with it. I felt defenceless.

"How would I know, Rowan? If I did, I'd have done something already," I said, my voice dropping low to a murmur as my head fell in my hands.

I felt him crouch in front of me on the floor. No, please no. I am strong, I don't want to cry. Sighing, I buckled up some of the strength I barely had left in myself and turned my head to look in his eyes. But, I failed. I failed as his hands came behind me and he wrapped himself patting my back in slow strokes. My hands found their way behind his shoulders and I pushed my face deep in his neck trying to calm myself down.

I can't cry. I can't cry. I shouldn't cry. It felt as though my very core was trembling, my heart wracked with pain, and my eyes betrayed me as a tear rolled out, making its path down on his shoulder.

"God, Vanessa. It's alright, I'm here for you. You're not alone," He said, hugging tightly. I snuggled my face deeper in his shoulder and my body shook with the turmoil. I never do this. I never cry in front of anyone but sometimes you just can not help yourself. That's what happened to me right there.

"Ssh, it's going to be okay. I'm here for you. It's going to be alright. Don't worry. Everything happens for a reason. You're going to be alright," he comforted me with those words. I tried to focus on them, but I felt nothing. Not a single hope. Will I ever find true happiness in this lifetime, or is that just an elusive dream? I felt pity for myself. I was on the mercy of a man, who tempted me, and on the mercy of a man, who wanted me gone from his life.

Fight it or accept it, he'd said.

I stayed in that position for a while, calming myself down while his hand patted my back in an assuring way. Gaining composure, I pulled my arm from beside him and sat there running my fingers over my eyes and cheeks to dry my tears off.

"Thank you, thank you so much Rowan," I genuinely meant every word when I said it. When you don't have anyone to comfort you, not that you need it, not that you need someone to listen to you, but you just want someone to lend you a shoulder to cry on, you then understand what it really means to have someone there for you. It's not about needing someone to solve your problems; it's about having that emotional support.

"You should come to meet up tonight. Natalie and others will be there too. It'd be fun, you will get everything off of yourself even for a while if that is," He said thinking for a moment adding, "And, about Adrian. It's-a coincidence that you guys met like this, although he's my friend from back in the university days. If you still want to work for his company after whatever is happening in between the families then it's totally your choice, V," Reassurance sparkled in his eyes.

"No, I get it. You don't have to justify it. Your friendship stays at place with him, our family's relations stay in their place. I've worked my ass off for years to get to this point with God knows how many breakdowns. And after thinking with a cold mind..." I inhaled some oxygen thinking if I was doing it right or not, I added, "I don't think I should let this chance go from my hand like this. It's just all so fucked up." I gestured with my hands up in the air.

"I know, and that's why, it's all up to you. If you want to have it or leave it. It's up to you and I mean it. You work in my company and moreover you're my homie but it doesn't change the fact that I want the best for you," He said getting up and giving me a slight smile.

"I know, and I love you for it. After all, no one would have approached a resting-bitch-faced like me in college if it wasn't for you," I admitted trying to shift the atmosphere.

"Anyways, I'll go now. Will meet you tonight. Don't forget to pin me the location, okay?"

"No, I'll pick you up. Come as my date today. I gotta show them that I've such a beautiful and gorgeous best friend," He said with a wink followed by a lopsided smile.

That pulled a laugh out of me, God what did I even do to deserve such a gem like him! Turning around, I took my handbag and walked outside.