Chapter 4 4

c H A P T E R|FOUR

(FLASHBACK)

CYNTHIA|P.O.V

I woke up EXCITED Because I'm excited to see my Bebe labs hihi.

I went to the bathroom after I got dressed which was too short. I did my make up.

"That's perfect!" I promised myself

maybe my zandro babe will like me hihi.

I went down and saw them laughing but when they saw me one by one they stood up and left

What else can I expect?

It's always like that HAHAH it's boring.

Instead of going to school, I went straight to my hangout.

When I arrived there, I changed my clothes and painted.

Yes paint.

AFTER I went out and it was afternoon. Time went by fast.

I sat in a chair and poured out all the pain.

"B-why is s-pain pain?"

i smile

"What do I lack? I've done everything, I'm trying to be a *sob* m-good son p-but why is it still missing?"

"I-I just want to feel that they m-love me m-is that hard?"

C H A P T E R|FOUR 1.1

CYNTHIA|P.O.V

"Are you alright, cyn?" Anastasia asked.

One of my friends.

"Sorry." I looked at Zandra, zandro's twin sister.

"You have no marriage" I said and smiled, he bowed

"I-I'm going to apologize for g-what my brother is doing, cyn. I'm sorry if I can't do anything, right?" He said so I hugged him.

"That's okay, Zan. It's okay, it's not your fault." I promise.

-

"LOOK who's here, the girl who's deeply in love with my BOYFRIEND" Crystal said and emphasized the word 'BOYFRIEND'

"I-I don't want trouble" I said weakly.

"Tsk, you know my hand is itching to slap you" he said and without saying anything he slapped me on the other cheek, I saw that he reached his own and took my hand to slap him.

"Ouch huhuhu b-babe zandro, she s-slap me" That's when I was surprised when someone slapped me.

'PAK'

'PAK'

"WHAT RIGHT DO YOU HAVE TO Slap OUR BROTHER? YOU ARE A LITTLE WORTHLESS PERSON! I AM REGRET THAT YOU HAVE BEEN MY BROTHER, I WISH YOU DIE!" Brother Sevi shouted.

sh.t is that what I'm with? I didn't do anything wrong.

I saw that crystal was smiling.

I looked at them" I-I hope so, I hope I just die" I said.

'PAK'

Mom slapped me. they are here too.

"YOU WOMAN HAVE NO SHAME! YOU ARE ALREADY GUILTY YOU ARE STILL ANGRY! I WISH YOU KNEW I DIDN'T SEE YOU SON, I WISH I KILLED YOU! YOU HAVE NO USE"

"It's not my fault that I'm alive mom, who did that to me? Right? I wish I lived here, mommy. if you're asking me to die, that's what I'm asking for too. Every day, every night, I wish that you would love me for just one second. I hope you love me when I wake up, but that's vague, mom. I also want to feel theA mother's love for her child, just want to feel love but why do I receive pain?all I want is attention, care, and love, is what I'm asking for difficult, mommy?" I made a long promise that silenced them.

"I hope you also asked me if I wanted to live, I didn't want to live mom," I promised and turned away but before that I said something else,

"If you blame me for being your son or brother, I blame you for being my family."

C H A P T E R|FOUR 1.2

CYNTHIA|P.O.V

"Am I THAT hard to love, mom?" I will ask

"Yes, You are a useless child. I regret raising you, You are a flirt! I don't have a flirtatious child, Fool like you! You know I hope you die." His long words crushed me.

"B-why? why? b-why am I the one who is n-hurt? I didn't n-do anything else?! Mom, I'm also your child, can you love me too?" I said while trying not to cry.

"I can't love you" he said seriously.

"W-why?"

"Because I don't want to, I can't love you because I can't love you--" I cut her words off

"I WISH YOU KILLED ME!" I shouted before running.

I'm free now that I'm far away from you.

I sat on the pavement crying and shed all my tears.

why are they angry with me?

I looked up at the sky and watched the moon.

I took my cell phone, good thing I got it.

I smile while staring at Zandro's picture.

"I w-wish I w-was crystal, Zan."

There's nothing wrong with what I'm doing, right?

I also fell in love when the person I love has another love and that is crystal, my sister.

I don't know why out of so many people in the world, why do I fall for someone who loves someone else?

I also fell in love with the wrong person.

C H A P T E R|FOUR 1.3

CYNTHIA|P.O.V

"Can you please go away?!" zandro said angrily.

"What if I don't want to?" I said while smirking.

"What do you want?" Saad said coldly.

"You."

"When do you plan to fall in love, Zandro?" I asked when he didn't answer.

"when will I love you."

I smile sadly.

"I hope that day I still love you, zandro." I said he was looking at me.

"What do you mean?" he asked

"Nothing" I said and left.

'I hope that by the time you love me, I still love you and by the time you remember, maybe by that time I will have forgotten you.'

'You don't hold my feelings, zandro, so at any time I can fall for someone else.'

'I love you but I love myself more, I'm tired my love.'

TOMORROW

I woke up early and baked cookies because this is the day I will give up.

"Hi zan, I made this for you" I said to the man in front of me. His friends and my brother are with him.

"Tsk," He said and took the cake I baked.

I smiled because this was the first time he took it when I gave it to him.

But my smile immediately disappeared when he threw it away.

I heard a lot of laughter and whispers saying that I'm poor if there are too many cheeses.

I want to cry but I don't want to look weak in front of them

"W-what did you throw away?" I asked with tears in my eyes.

"Can you please stop chasing me, cyn? How many times do I have to tell you that I can't love you back! i don't love nor like you, cyn. i love someone else and that's crystal" my sister...

"W-why is he, z-zan? b-why is he still my brother?" I asked while trying to hold my tears.

"Easy because she's different from you, cyn. she's everyone's ideal girl, she caught my attention. I love her more than my life. and you? Your an attention seeker, a slut, bitch, I can't love you back because I don't love you" He said.

Why? Why is pain pain?

After all, who am I? I was touched by beauty. Because if you compare me to my sister, I lose, she's beautiful, she has everything that I never had.

"I know that" I said, I tried to laugh just to stop my tears from falling. "B-but don't I-face me, I-I don't know you, zan" I promised and burst out laughing.

"Honestly" I promised and looked at him "I'm d-tired too, I'm t-tired chasing y-you Mr. zandro chase Sanford, if H-I don't love you, can you not judge me?" and laughed."Maybe you just know my name but not my story, remember this moment, zan. this moment, this day when you lose the girl who truly loves you" I smile at them "I'm Cynthia Agatha Yvuelian officially done chasing you, Mr . Zandro Chase Sanford" and left them silently.

I ran until I realized that a truck was coming and I just found myself bathing with my own blood.

and that they I lost my memory.

(End of flashback)

-

Laugh first in the next part