Chapter 4 Four

Rachel

"Rachel, do you think Daddy loves Jane?" Marline asks, scanning pictures of Brandon and Jane and placing them beside each other.

"You know you're smarter than any kid your age," I said, sitting beside Marline as she smiled at my words. "And yeah, I think your daddy loves Jane, and you know a secret."

"What a secret!" Marlin said, suddenly excited by my words.

"Well, I don't know for sure, but I think Jane loves Brandon too, in one way or another."

"Really, Marline jumps in excitement at my words.

"Hey, but don't say that to your dad or Jane; it's our little secret."

"What secret......"

We both turned our faces to see Jane standing in the doorway, with five-month-old Liam and loads of shopping bags in her arms.

"Jane." I quickly took long steps to the doorways, helping Jane with bags of groceries. "How many times do I have to tell you to call me when you need me? I scolded Jane, only to make her smile and baby Liam giggle.

"So cute," I said, watching Liam yawing in his mother's arms. "Watching you makes me want to have a baby, but then I change my mind, seeing all the hard work you and Brandon have to put in to raise these two devils."

"I hate you, Rachel," Marlin said from behind me, crossing her arms around her chest.

"No, you don't," I said, tickling her and making her laugh. "See, you love me."

"Can I play with Liam?" Marline asked after a while, as Jane relaxed her frame on the couch with Marlin sitting beside her, watching her. "Sure, baby, but Liam, as you can see, Liam is asleep now." Marline looked upset at Jane's words but then smiled. "Then can you tell me a story?" Jane nodded.

I sat on the couch, watching the three of them snuggle on the couch and have warm, cozy family time with each other. It's comforting to see how, even without being connected to each other by blood, they find comfort and love in each other's company.

I sometimes find myself an outsider watching them interact, but I'm happy to find such good people to work for, I can't lie I miss my past life, my old place, and people from my past mostly. Jayce, it's been a year, but I couldn't forgo my feelings for him. I just hope that he is happy, maybe moves on with his life, and maybe gets married and has kids that are as sweet as Marline and Liam. Even if he is not with me, I wish him all the happiness in life and in the future. I wish that I could say the same for myself.

"Hey guys," I turned my head and watched Brandon inside, washing his hands, before sitting beside Jane. "How is my big boy?" Brandon smiled, cuddling Liam in his arms.

God, they look so cute with Jane snuggling with Marline and Brandon with Liam, and with them playing and snuggling with each other's kids. This image is so cute that I'm so jealous.

I picked up the phone and clicked a few pictures, not letting this perfect moment go uncaptured. "So cute." My words came louder than I accepted, and both Jane and Brandon turned their heads at me. "Rachel."

I smiled, trying to act innocent. "What... Don't worry, I'll send you both a copy. For now, bye," I said, grabbing my bag and running.

"Rachel," I smiled, hearing them shouting my name again and laughing later together. They deserve all the happiness in life.

Small and simple moments and time with family are things that I would die for, but I don't think I deserve any of them. For now, I have to go to work, or I'm going to be late.

*******

Jayce

"So what do you think about the new recipe?" One of my chef's questions distracted my thoughts.

"It's bland; there's no flavor." I slid the plate away from me. "But this time, I tried my best."

"Yeah, as last time and the time before that," I stood from my table, wanting to get far away from the person who didn't even know how to cook a simple dish like this.

"But..." he complained.

"You know what you're fired for; just pack and leave."

"What...but..." He continued as I left the room without caring about his complaints. If a person doesn't know how to cook this simple dish, I don't know how he'll manage to cook dishes that are far more complicated and precise than this.

God, I need some fresh air and maybe liquor.

At times like this, I miss Rachel even more than I wanted to; she was the best, even without any professional experience or background in food. The flavor profile of her dishes, the aroma, and the way she presented each and every creation of hers with so much attention and detail I miss her cooking more than I want to accept it.

Even with years of work and learning, I can't compare with Rachel.

It's almost been a year, and yet I couldn't find a clue of where she is, what makes my search harder is that Rachel is a loner and secretive person; in many ways, she is like me.

Except for the fact that she is loud and quirky, which is quite the opposite of what I am, staying away from her made me realize one thing that I haven't realized working with her for years. Her smile and attitude are just a mask that she puts on to hide the true feelings in her heart. Her smile is nothing but a shield that she uses to protect herself from suffering, but that day, with alcohol in her system, she is finally able to show the pain, the thoughts, and the feeling she has been hiding for years, and that was the last day she did that because, after that night, she disappears like a mist in the air, leaving no clue behind whatsoever.

I sighed, shaking my head and forgoing thoughts of Rachel. I don't want to think of her now. It's been a year, and I'm trying my best to find her and find ways to contact her. But I'm angry too-anger not only because she left me alone while I was asleep, but not for once did she think of contacting me or clearing any misunderstanding before she ended anything between us.

I know that we were not lovers, not boyfriends or girlfriends, but still, we were something, at least for the sake of our work relationship. She could talk to me for once before ending everything and leaving with so many unanswered questions behind.