Chapter 5 INTERRUPTED DESPAIR

CHAPTER 5: INTERRUPTED DESPAIR

I sat in my bed thinking about what to do regarding my current situation. My head throbbed from crying, I felt dirty from my experience with Leonardo at the diner. Thoughts raced through my mind, swirling in a chaotic whirlwind of confusion and uncertainty.

The future I had imagined, with dreams of a college education, now seemed like a distant mirage. I looked outside the window to watch the sun setting, casting long shadows across the campus, mirroring the darkness that consumed my spirit.

I clutched the crumpled letter tightly in my hand, its words of denial etched into my memory. "We regret to inform you..." Those words echoed like a relentless chant, reminding me of my shattered dreams.

I scrubbed my body over and over again in the bathroom in a bid to feel clean. The realization that I would have to forfeit my education in the long run as I had no other options left to explore dawned on me once more, hitting me like a tidal wave as tears flowed freely down my face.

As I was thinking about moving back to the island, the door to my dormitory was pushed open, I hurriedly wiped my tears half expecting to see Serena but when I looked up, it was a stranger staring back at me. Concern written all over her beautiful face, her blonde hair cascaded on her shoulders.

"Hello. Um," I paused, trying to gather my thoughts. Who was she? I didn't know how to ask her what she wanted without coming off as rude. I was already in a terrible mental place and I did not want to seem like I was lashing out on other people. I looked at her questioningly, letting the silence linger.

"Were you crying?" she asked, as she walked towards my bed and sat on it.

"No. Are you looking for something?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"I saw you crying. I came looking for Serena, I'm Licia. What's your name and why are you crying?"

"My name is Elsa. Serena isn't here. She went to her family's villa for the weekend. She's expected to be back today or tomorrow. Perhaps if you checked in later tonight, you might have a chance."

"You're deflecting Elsa," She said pouting. "That's an indicator that something is wrong. What is going on with you? Perhaps I might be able to help."

I looked at her for a few minutes and sighed dejectedly. "I've grown weary of telling my problems to everybody. It changes nothing. Thank you for your concern."

"Well, I'm not leaving now that I know I'm right. You were crying when I walked in. You look like shit, your eyes are swollen, your hair is messed up and I like a good story," She paused and peered at my neck. "Did someone put their hands on you?" She asked.

"No. Why?" I replied. My voice was laced with panic as I remembered Leonardo's threats when I ran out of the diner.

I felt my anxiety level rise, my heart pounded heavily against my chest, beads of sweat formed on my forehead and my hands started shaking. I quickly grabbed a pillow, placed it across my knee and tucked my palms underneath to hide them.

"You're still lying, I can see fingerprints. They're faint, but they're there. Who did this to you? What else did they do?"

"I swear, I'm fine Licia. Truly. Thank you."

She looked at me and shook her head. "If you're not going to say anything to me, perhaps you would like me to get the school authorities involved cause clearly you've been abused and you're too scared to state your experience. I'm going to walk down to the administrative department and get people involved in this if you don't start talking."

"Authorities?" I asked, panicking as she walked towards the door. "Wait!" I yelled as she opened the door.

She arched her eyebrows questioningly and I sighed. "Fine. I'll tell you what's going on with me but you have to promise me that you won't tell anyone else. Especially not the school authorities."

She closed the door and walked back to my bed. She smiled a little, lifted up her palm and put her little finger forward. "Pinky swear," She said and took my trembling hands in hers. "Elsa, what's wrong? You look devastated," she continued. Her voice filled with genuine worry.

I sniffled and wiped away a stray tear but that was futile as the tears flowed down my face freely. "It's the school board. They rejected my application for financial aid. I don't know how I'll be able to afford tuition fees now," I said, my voice trembling with despair.

Licia sighed and placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. "I'm so sorry, Elsa. That's incredibly tough. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult this must be for you but you can't give up. There has to be another way," she said, her voice filled with determination.

I glanced at her, and shook my head. "I've tried everything, Licia. Scholarships, loans . . . nothing seems to work. It feels like all my hard work and dreams are being crushed. I'm going to return home to my Mamma, I don't know how to tell her that all our efforts were in vain." I said, as I tried to stop the tears from ceaselessly flowing down my face.

Licia's gaze softened, her voice gentle yet

resolute. "Elsa, I know it's hard right now, but you're not alone in this. We'll find a solution together. I'll help you but first, we've got to go do something fun."

Fun? I chuckled at the thought and Licia looked at me quizzically.

"I can't afford fun right now... I barely have enough money to feed. All I have, I'm saving for my journey back home."

"You're not going back home. We're going to a party."

"A party? I've never been to one. I don't have clothes for that type of occasion." I replied, suddenly insecure about my fashion choices.

She looked at me, walked up to my wardrobe stationed in the corner of the room, opened it up and chuckled. "Elsa, darling. I mean no offense when I say this but I don't think you have clothes for any occasion."

"I told you." I replied with a shrug. "No partying for me which is rather great cause I would prefer to stay indoors-"

"And wallow? Not a chance babe." she said, interrupting me. "I'm not going to let you stay in here feeling depressed and miserable about your misfortunes. We're going shopping but first, we're going to revamp this wardrobe of yours. Your entire style needs a complete overhaul. I can't believe Serena has been letting you wear these." She said, gesturing to my stack of clothes.

I smiled at her statement. I deduced that Serena hadn't said anything about my clothes because she didn't want me to feel unhappy, insecure or inferior. I liked that she was thoughtful. I also liked that Licia had said something about my fashion choices. Her outspoken nature drew me to her. She had an allure that seemed to keep me on my feet, happy and distracted from my problems.

"To be fair, she's barely here so she scarcely sees me dressing up for classes," I replied.

"That explains a lot. We're throwing these out. Every single one of them is a fashion

disaster."

"What? No! That is not happening. Some of those were made by my Mamma." I retorted.

"Fine. We'll leave the clothes that were made with love, and find appropriate pieces to pair them with as well. The rest have got to go. Give them to charity, burn them or something. They're absolutely hideous."

"They're not all that bad."

"Yeah. If you were living in the 1800s, thankfully we're in the 21st century. You're never wearing stuff like this while I am around. Come on, let's get to sorting. Show me the ones you want to keep. As soon as we're done with that, we're going to the mall." She replied and studied my hair as I walked over to the wardrobe and began sorting through the heap of clothes.

"I'm not letting you do anything to my hair," I said as she watched me intently.

"Yeah, like you've been doing a great job so far. Look at all that rich red hair stacked on that head of yours and somehow you have managed to keep your beauty hidden."

"I wasn't hiding anything."

"Yeah, you've just not been paying attention to yourself. Now I'm here, you're welcome." She answered and I chuckled.

"Fine. I'll leave all the fashion choices to you, milady. I know nothing about it after all," I said and she clapped excitedly.

"You've still not told me about the fingerprints on your neck."

"You don't miss a beat do you?" I asked, smiling.

"Nope. Some people find me insufferable but in the end, they love me," She replied, a smile playing at the corner of her lips as we finished sorting the clothes.

I changed into a fresh set of clothes and we made our way out of the room. As we walked out of the dormitory onto the campus hand in hand, I felt a renewed sense of purpose. The road ahead might be difficult, but I knew I had found a friendship of sorts in Serena and Licia and I was grateful for the company. My despair had been interrupted, and in its place blossomed a flicker of hope.