Chapter 2 Mixed Emotions

I was in my bed when Emma crossed my mind. Her beauty is unmatched but on top of that she's a genuine person. Her heart is so big, so pure.

I miss being with her, being by her side. I miss her smile, a smile that always cheers me up on a sad day, and her gentle caresses when we cuddle. I just miss her.

Has her appearance changed? I couldn't help but wonder. Has she gained weight or lost? Did she keep the Bob I suggested for her, or did she let it grow out? Either way, she'd be beautiful.

Getting out of bed, I poured myself some alcohol. I need to get her out of my head.

This has been my everyday routine since I parted ways with my loves. The liquor burned as I swallowed, but I didn't stop. I kept drinking it as if it was water.

After drinking the last of my liquor, I opened another bottle.

Four months

Four months have gone by since I last saw them. Alcohol is the cure I used to treat the guilt I experience daily for leaving my pregnant girlfriend. And breaking up with my boyfriend.

Speaking about my boyfriend, I miss him more than I do Emma. Don't get me wrong, I love her. I love them equally. But I've never spent this much time away from Clay, not since we confessed our love for each other back in college.

Flashback to the first time they confessed they had feelings for each other

"Why have you been acting so strange lately?" I questioned my best friend, afraid I'd lose him. He doesn't answer me, pretending not to hear me.

I grabbed his chin roughly, forcing him to look at me. "Clay please tell me what's going on. I don't want to lose you "

his eyes watered. " I don't want to lose you either. " I pulled my best friend into a hug, stroking his back.

"Then tell me what's going on?"

" you don't understand, telling you is how I'll lose you. " I pull away to look at him. None of what he's saying makes any sense.

I place my head on his forehead "I'll always be here for you, No matter what you're hiding" his eyes scanned mine and before I knew it, his lips were on mine it took me by surprise and I was sure it did him too.

"You have feelings for me. It's that what you were so afraid to tell me?" he nods shyly.

"Well, don't because I have for you too."

End of flashback.

That night, we stayed in bed, cuddled, and talked about our feelings. Turns out he developed a crush on me around the same time I developed to mine for him. Which was back when we were 14 a year after we met Emma.

I finished drinking my drink and grabbed another bottle, only to put it back down. Emma wouldn't want that.

Fuck, why am I thinking about her? about them. I crawl back into bed, getting under the covers, only to start crying.

Clay was right, this relationship wasn't gonna last. How stupid of me to believe it would. I was such a fool for thinking that.

I feel fucked up. All of this could have been prevented. Now they might both hate me.

Stumbling out of bed, I grabbed my phone book, searching for a specific number.

When I found it, I hesitated for a while before calling it.

"Who's this?" A familiar voice came through. "

"Leo, it's me,"

"Oh Ace, how's it going? haven't heard from you in months"

"I've been great," I lied

"And you?"

"I've been well. Jada and I are planning a baby. "

"That's awesome. Speaking about Jada, can I speak to her?"

" Sure," he yells her name and a few seconds later she had the phone

"Hi, Sir,"

"Hi there, I wanna talk about Emma"

"There's nothing to talk about, you poor excuse of a man," I was taken aback by her words.

"Apologies to him now" her dominant orders. I'm pretty sure punishment will be in store for her.

"No" she shocked me. She's a very submissive woman.

"I said to apologize to him now," a loud slap echoed through the phone.

"Ouch, Master, I won't. What kind of man leaves his pregnant on her own to suffer? "

Leo didn't say anything, which means he agrees with his sub.

Embarrassed, I hung up the phone and threw it across the room, shattering it against the wall.

She's right, what kind? Man am I?

I shouldn't have left her. I didn't want to leave her. The thing is, I wanted her for myself. sharing her with Clay was no longer an option since he's his mom's bitch

If she says jump, he'll ask how high. He hurt Emma and me multiple times due to that woman.

My phone rang, and I took it up, surprised it was still working.

"I like to apologize for my submissive behaviors and"

"It's fine, Leo,"

"She was right though, what you did was fucked up"

"I know man" I popped open another drink, my guilt more intense now than ever.

"Then what are you gonna do?, the last time I heard she was 8 months pregnant"

"Master, it's 7 she's seven months pregnant," his submissive corrected him.

"Go wait for me in the playroom, will you?"

"Please don't punish her. "

"She needs to know that no matter how she feels, she should always be respectful to others. Especially other doms,"

I agree with him, but I just can't help but feel bad.

"Give Emma a call and work it out with her. She needs y'all and so does that unborn child. "

"Thanks, man. "

I down my drink.

"Anytime"

When asked to choose, she should have chosen me. It's her fault. Why do I even care?. For all, I know that child might not even be mine.

Dedicated to: megha gupta