Chapter 5 Life as Soleil Jenner

I know I'm overreacting, but.

He's so fucking annoying! I have never been kissed that rough!

I'm an updated version of Maria Clara for his fucking information!

I'm wearing a black top with a Queen-Anne neckline and black tattered skinny jeans pairing it with open-toe stilettos. These are the only clothes I saw in Soleil's closet that are popular to my taste.

While downstairs, I was raking my bucket handbag. I stopped when I heard crying.

"I'm sorry, Mama, I'll do my best next time," the poor girl plea in a brittle voice. I think she was on her knees with the woman in her mid-40s, angry at the look.

Who are they? Maybe, Soleil's relative? I was about to leave when the girl's eyes and my eyes met. I see how her eyes squint. I shrugged and continued walking. I have so many things to do!

Soleil's father wanted to have a talk with me in the backyard. I was still a little lost before reaching their backyard. Her father and the butler talked seriously, but when they felt my presence, Aunt Lena's face immediately lit up on me.

I kissed the butler's cheek before Soleil's father's cheek. I tried to act cheerful, innocent, and kind in front of them. I guess I have many masks to wear now.

"I'll leave you first," the old woman whispered before leaving us there.

I sat in the vacant seat and faced Astrid's father slightly. He's reading a newspaper with just his household clothes.

I slightly cleared my throat to catch his attention. He sipped his coffee before putting the newspaper aside. He glared at my hand, so I looked there too.

"Daddy, what's wrong?"

He let out a loud sigh before he looked at me directly. His eyes state a sadness.

"You look completely different right now, Soleil. Tell me, how it's going between Primo and you?"

I am now out of breath. "Dad, my relationship with Primo is a private matter."

The side of his lips rose, bothered by what I said. "My dear, Aunt Lena told me everything the day before you left our country." He tenderly took my hand and caressed my finger where the ring should be placed. "My dear, please open up to me; I can cancel the wedding-"

That made me rise from where I sit.

"No!"

Primo plays a significant role in my plan! That darn wedding is my ace! It can't be canceled because I'm sure it will do a lot of damage to my plan.

I immediately calmed down when I saw the shock on his face.

"D-dad... I l-love Primo, and I'll p-promise to you that our r-relationship will work out." Trust me; I'm hesitating to say that. I plastered a fruity smile on my lips.

He shook his head. "When I found out if you like Primo, I immediately accepted his father's proposal to me though I can't get that many benefits on their school. It's because I want you to be happy. So if what I give you pleasure he will also give pain in your life, I'm ready to take back what I gave!" He held both my shoulders. I looked there. "Soleil, I won't let anyone hurt my big baby."

I tried to smile. "Dad, just trust me."

What did the older woman and Soleil talk about that day?

He hesitantly nodded. I grinned and hugged him from behind. His hug is so soothing. I hope in my next life, he will be my father.

"Dad, have you heard a Johnson surname?" My lips pursed while asking that. I just want to know if Dad's approval got approved.

I couldn't help but let go when he turned his back on me.

"Yes, I heard a proposal on him just a week ago-"

"You should accept it, Dad! That was my friend's family business. I've visited their company, and it was nice-"

"I am about to, but they turned it down," he said and took the newspaper to go back to reading, but I immediately took it from him.

"T-they turned it d-down? Why?"

This fucking proposal changed Dad! And then he turned it down ?! I see no reason for him to do that!

He took the newspaper from me. "I don't know, Soleil, so let me enjoy my newspaper and go on now to your orphanage. The children there missed you a lot."

I left there with nothing on my own.

Daddy is unbelievable! He made me turn like this to save our company, and now... he just wasted my sacrifice!

I ordered Astrid's driver. I gave him our address.

I have to know his reasons, and he should give me a valid one!

My brows furrowed when I saw the things in our house being lifted out. I immediately hopped out of the car and approached a man bearing one of our furniture.

"What's going on here?"

"Uh, Mr. Johnson is going to sell it."

"The hell... Why?"

He shrugged and continued what he was doing. I ran into the house and almost ran out of things in it. I tried to find one of our maids, but I didn't see a familiar face.

Where is Mommy? Vince? I even saw him yesterday! I don't know, but I'm already crying over my thoughts.

It was as if a thorn had bitten me when I saw Vince just entering the house. His eyes narrowed, trying to familiarize my face. Seconds later, the curiosity was discarded and replaced by anger.

He sneezed. "What are you doing here?"

"Vince..." I stepped closer, but he backed away. Disgusted. I felt something in my heart because of his action.

"What are you doing here, Ms. Jenner?" He mocked the surname he mentioned.

"Don't call me that!"

"I'll call you the way I want! You're not Andra anymore! That look is what you'll carry until your death-"

"Why are you like that ?! I was forced, Vince! You know that!" I know that at any second, my tears will burst out.

He sneered. "Don't act like you're in the damsel just because you were forced! You're the one who will benefit the most-"

"Vince!"

I feel I was a stranger to him. I've never seen this side of him because he is always soft and kind to me!

"Get out. I swear you won't like it if I'll be the one who drags you out."

I nodded slowly. I'll talk to him some other time. If I asked where Mommy was, I knew he wouldn't answer me, and he might just scold me. When I got to the door, I looked at him with teary eyes for the last time.

Are we going to go back to the past, Vince?

From what he shows, it's hard to predict.

Until I got out the door, no Vince followed me. I was expecting it! I was expecting him to take his words back.

My jaw clenched when I saw my reflection in the car's window. Before, Vince despised his parents the most. But now... this is the face of the person he hates.

"Andra!"

I tightened my grip on the handle and immediately turned to Vince. Why is he calling my name? I thought he couldn't stand me, eh!

"This will be the last time you'll hear that name coming from me." He handed me a small white envelope. "Read that later when you're in the car." He was cold.

He gave the driver an address before turning his back on me and not looking back. I collected myself before I hopped in the car. I immediately read the envelope Vince had given me. It was my mother's letter.

Dear Andra,

I know if you'll read this, I'm out of this world. I can only tell you one thing. For you or the people who surround you, I may not be your real mother, but you were my daughter for me. I regret every day, sweetie, the day I sent you abroad. If only my brain hadn't been closed that day, you wouldn't have walked away from me. I would never have lost a child. I'm so sorry, Soleil. I'm so sorry. Please don't take the operation. It's all my fault, sweetie. Blame me. Revenge your mother's death on me. I will accept everything, sweetie because I love you so much. Always remember I love you unconditionally.

Love,

Mother

My grip on the paper tightened when I saw where we were. "No! No, It can't be!"

"Ma'am, we're here," said the driver in the review mirror.

I refrain from crying in front of her because I don't want her to be surprised, and she might even report me to Astrid's father.

"Leave me here. I will meet someone here." I went out and didn't wait for him to answer.

I feel like a fool now, crying while looking for Mommy's name. I hope I don't see his name here, but I feel drenched in cold water when I see his name.

"M-Mommy..."

I lost two precious women in my life.

What have I done in my previous life that made my life so cruel right now? Why is it like this? Why does karma seem to be chasing me now ?!

My feet felt so numb from running earlier. But I don't have time to endure it. I have to be wasted to be able to forget the pain on this day!

Back then, I didn't want to introduce a new person into my heart so that I had no one to lose. But now, the pain gets worst when I have no one to lean on.

No Vince. No Mommy. I have nothing now.

"Party!" I shout at the wave of people while holding Antonov in my right hand.

This is my third bar now, and I don't know if my eyes are playing with me because I saw the man I had seen before in the bars I went to.

I'm not drunk, just a little bit tipsy. My alcohol tolerance is not that high and not that low, just neutral. I get drunk, but it's not that easy.

I immediately knocked over the bottle of vodka and immediately drew its heat down my throat. I need Jack Daniels! I stood up, but someone stopped me even before I reached the counter.

"You're drunk...."

A smug appeared on my lips when I saw the face who was trying to stop me tonight. The man who I was talking about.

"What about you?"

Andra? Are you lowkey flirting with him?

Maybe I'm his type? He probably wouldn't have followed me if he hadn't, right?

I smiled devilishly as I wrapped my hands around his neck. I saw how he missed what I did. My eyes narrowed when I saw him looking around as if afraid someone might see our position.

I like to tease people who are especially visible to their feelings or reactions.

"S-Soleil, what are you doing?" He mumbled.

I tightened my grip on him even more and whispered in his ear. Enough for him to inhale and feel my breath.

"You were following me like a madman. You like me, don't you?"

Before he could push me, I crushed my lips on his. I felt him still, especially when my lips moved. Slowly, he kissed me back, and I didn't like it, to my surprise.

This isn't my first time kissing strangers. And for the first time, it was like I was looking for what. I want to feel something in my system!

When I felt his tongue entering my mouth, I was about to push him when someone dragged me. I fell to the floor because of the force of his pull. My eyes widened when someone punched the man I had just kissed seconds ago. And I think my eyes widened even more, when I saw who beat the man I was kissing.

The mighty Primo!

He punched the man three times right on his face, I wanted to stop Primo, but I couldn't stand up. I'm sorry! For Pete's sake! I'm the one who kisses him first!

"Stop!" I shouted even though I knew they couldn't hear it because of the people's screams.

"How could you make out with my fianceé when dating my sister!" Primo shouted, full of fury. That resounded.

Two bouncers are preventing him. While the man is still on the floor and has not yet recovered. Fuck, I really can't get drunk tonight!

Instead of watching them, I stood away from there. Maybe, I'll find another bar? I returned my handbag to where I was sitting earlier. Many people looked at me, but I didn't bother to pay attention to them. I don't care. All I want now is to get drunk!

"Isn't that Soleil Jenner?"

"She is! For Pete's sake-"

I was stunned by their whispers before leaving with a sore foot.

Standing Primo greeted me in the bar lobby. I gave up when he pulled me over and forced me into his car.

Minutes later, I found myself in a small convenience store and waiting for Primo to have something to buy inside.

"What for? I'm not drunk?" I sat down when he put coffee in front of me. He wants me to get sober.

I heard his heavy sighs before he sat down in front of me. "Explain."

"Why would I? I'm an adult. It's okay for me to kiss strangers-"

"Stranger ?! Gino is not a stranger to you, Soleil!"

Damn it, Andra! Who are you kissing! Whatever. I'm not in the mood to explain.

I rolled my eyes at him before I stood up. He hit the table, causing my belongings to fall out of my handbag.

"And where are you going ?!" His voice is like thunder, but my attention is not on him but the paper.

The paper that Mommy last gave me. Everything I feel now is gradually being replaced by sadness.

I slowly sat down. I didn't know that I still had tears to shed. I shouted in frustration and pulled myself together before sinking my face into the table, crying out loud.

Minutes later, I felt someone tapping my head softly. That made me lookup.

He averted his gaze. "Stop crying; I hate a cry baby."

When he said that, I cried even more. My sobs got louder.

Yes, I'm maybe a bitch sometimes, but I'm such a cry baby.