Chapter 5 His Break-up

🤍🖤💜 Jacob 💜🖤🤍

I thought this evening and this party would lighten my mood. But I am feeling the complete opposite. I am beginning to regret being with my girlfriend. I am beginning to regret leading her on this far.

"I am sorry, Jacob. I am not sure what got over me at school." Sadie, my girlfriend, says to me while leaning into my body. She knows I don't like it. It makes me uncomfortable because now-a-days she only leans into me, expecting a reaction.

How the fuck I can give her a reaction when I don't feel anything for her?

But I won't say anything right now. It will create another argument right here.

"I said I am sorry," she pouts when I do not reply.

I just smile at her and say, "Just don't do it again..."

She makes a face. She probably expected I will say 'it's okay'. But it wasn't okay.

I am tired of her fake apologies. Every other day, she creates some new big drama. She seemed really sweet when I started dating her. But now I can see how controlling and possessive she is... Today she started an argument with my project partner, saying she was trying to flirt with me. I had to pull her away when I saw Sadie trying to hit her.

It's her birthday today, so I am not in the mood to upset her. I drink my beer to smother the unbearable dread I am feeling right now. I understand it's difficult for her too. But I won't sleep with her, just because she is pressuring me.

"I haven't gotten my kiss today," she whispers in my ear, looping her arms around my neck. Then plants her lips on mine.

I enjoyed kissing and holding her before. But it changed when she started showing her true colors. It's difficult for me to ignore personality. She still tries to keep her facade up, but her genuine nature is too loud to ignore.

I am kissing her back just for the sake of it. I wonder if she can sense that I am not into her anymore.

"Hey, you guys! Stop PDA and get a room!"

One of her friends yells at us. Sadie laughs and pulls me with her into her bedroom.

I have to break up with her. Everything is not her fault alone. Yes, I am tired of her drama and fights. But I also feel bad for disappointing her again and again. I hate it when she asks if she is not beautiful enough. If that's why I won't have sex with her.

"Wait here. I will grab some more drinks," she says, going out.

"I won't take any... am kinda drunk already." I tell her. I am surprised how she managed to get beer for this party. We are barely seventeen, for God's sake. It's nice to have it once in a while though.

She waves me off. "One more. Come on!!!" and goes out.

I sigh and lay in her bed, closing my eyes. After a while, I hear her coming back and calling my name.

I mumble with my eyes closed, "Let me sleep for a while... I am too drunk..."

She lays next to me. I spoon her and fall asleep.

......

I am still half asleep but I am feeling uncomfortable and slimy. Something is wrong.

I am not sure if it's sleep paralysis or what, but I am trying to wake up.. I am feeling something, but I don't want to believe it. When I force myself to open my eyes. I feel disgusted and dirty when I see what Sadie is doing.

Sadie is naked and has undone my pants and is licking and sucking me. I am shocked and speechless for a moment but I bark at her, "SADIE!!!"

I pull myself away and get out of the bed. I feel slimy as my cock is wet with her saliva. I grab a T-shirt lying on the bed to dry it.

Fuck, it's her top.

I throw it away, sickened, as if it will make me feel any better.

"You are a liar, Jacob! If you weren't into sex, why would you be so hard?"

I look at her in disbelief while buttoning my pants. "That's how a body works ... That doesn't mean you can try it without my fucking consent!!!"

I want to yell at her at the top of my lungs. I am seething and want to punch her face.

I start pacing out of the house towards my car. Party is over and everyone is gone.

Why did I come here today? Her drama at school today should have been the last straw. If I had taken a stand today, this wouldn't have happened.

Sadie is following me outside. "I am sorry Jacob... Please don't go. That was stupid of me to try. But believe me... You will feel good if you let me touch you."

"Stop Sadie! I am fucking repulsed by you. Just STOP!!"

I get inside my car and she stands there with a sheet wrapped around, watching me. I can't even look at her face right now.

"It's fucking over," I tell her and drive away.

After reaching home, I take a shower. I want to burn myself with scalding hot water. Anything to feel normal. I am feeling so much disgust and revulsion within myself.

Fuck.

Never again.

Never again I will let anyone get close to me unless I want to.

No more, let's try and see if it works shit!

Probably I am supposed to be alone.

....

Time heals nothing unless you move along with it...

- A Year Later -

🤍🖤💜 Jacob 💜🖤🤍

"It's time Jacob!! I told you to get ready half-hour ago!"

I grunt, trying to reach my shoes below the bed. I should listen to my mom often. It's getting more and more difficult to find things in this messy room lately. And how the hell did my shoe go this far under the bed? Coco's deed. I am sure. They say dogs don't hold grudges, but I call it animal dung theory. She knows how to annoy me. I should have taken her for a walk last night.

"Just Go!! I know their house, "I yelled at mom in annoyance and grimace immediately.

"OK!! We will talk about your condescending tone later." I wince, imagining the late-night lecture. Thanks, Coco. She sits next to me amused, watching me move the bed. It's heavy... Wish I hadn't thrown all my shit on bed earlier.

Considering the level of enthusiasm, I should be the first one to reach there. But looks like, Thanks to Coco, we will exercise play-it-cool tonight. This girl has been on my mind ever since we came here to view this place as an Open house. I have seen her before a few times. Sometimes at matches and sometimes at parties. I couldn't stop myself when I saw her in her front lawn painting her mailbox. I remember the first time I had seen her. It was more than a year ago. Her skin is still flawless white. Her hair is longer. So... When dad was trying to close the deal, I was trying to figure out where she lived.

Just when I am about to wear my shoes, Coco decides to go tug-of-war.

"No Coco! I am late! "

That gets a whine from her. After patting her and rubbing her ears for a minute or two, I go downstairs and she follows me with enthusiasm.

Perceiving her mood, I ensure her idiotically, "I will take you to a walk after coming back"

It gets her super excited. It was dense of me to mention W-A-L-K. June says it is a forbidden word now. I can see why.

I am sure she will create mayhem once I am gone. She has barely been with us for a month and Mom is already fed up with her. Nobody claimed her even after many social media posts and flyers. She isn't well trained and gets on our nerves sometimes. Could be the reason her previous owner dumped her.

I don't want her to end up on the streets or shelter again. They put down dogs sometimes. I shiver at thought and tie her harness to take her out for a walk.

Looks like I will die alone... For the first time ever I have gotten this much interested in a girl and I don't even know anything about her.

I don't even know if that girl is single or what. I stopped my conquest after finding her house. Ahem! yeah... I might have played a mind game or two with my mom to get this dinner planned. Our families think it's just a 'know-your-neighbors' get together, which it totally is. They came to our house first. For a brief visit. I was disappointed when she didn't come. My heart will splinter if I don't get to see her tonight.

As I start walking Coco in the opposite direction of their house, I cannot help but wonder if it's freaky? My interest in this girl.... I don't know how normal people feel. For a long time, I didn't even understand the concept of sexual attraction. I sincerely hope it falls somewhere in the normal range.

I have only dated a girl so far and barely went out with her for a few months. It's difficult to pretend when you don't have an attraction to someone or anyone, for that matter. I don't think I have gotten attracted to anyone in my life yet.

Ok, that's an overstatement.

I do get attracted. But it's usually an urge to know them better. Rarely sexual. In peer pressure, I did try to date. Not a good experience. I will rather be called black sheep than feel that awkwardness and disgust again in my life.

I am much happier jerking off alone than sticking my dick into something or someone I don't like.

But for a change and for the first time, I have an urge to know a stranger.

... ...

After walking for a good 10 minutes, I turn back towards home and Coco is resisting. Smartass dog! She knows it's time to go home. After five minutes of back and forth, I finally manage to get her home.

When I finally leave for their house, my phone gives me 4-5 chimes back to back.

June: 'don't tell me you got cold feet'

June: 'ohh it smells nice'

June: 'ohhh she smells nice'

June: 'Are you not coming? I am freaking out. They are asking me questions'

June: 'about my private life!'

June: 'where the actual F are you?'

Me: 'Language young lady!!'

Drama Queen! She is there to watch the drama of my life unfold. She had no interest in dinner otherwise. A year younger than me, but as nosy as a grandma.

I knock at their door, and Mrs. Relish opens the door.

"oh look, here you are!"

"Sorry I had to walk my dog"

"oh... Natalie would love to hear about your dog. Come on in."

So this indeed is her name. Natalie...

June told me. She started school a week ago and I am sure she can tell me a few things about her if I ask. But I didn't. I want to know her by myself.

"Did you say there is a Dog?" A voice booms from their living area and then I see her...