Chapter 5 Part 4

Prithvi...(past)

"I don't understand what seems to be the problem" his mother stared at his class teacher who had a skeptical expression "you said my son is very quiet..he doesn't talk to anyone and is extremely shy..that's a good thing right?"

The teacher observed the boy who stood next to his mother, his head bent and looking at the ground "Prithvi? Why don't you wait outside?"she said sweetly. He looked up and nodded, walking out of the staff room.

He waited outside, his heart hammering in his chest. He stared at the burn mark on his hand which wouldn't go..no matter how hard he tried to rub it. The scar seemed to have remained as a painful reminder with him for six years.

He waited for the meeting to get over, his mind full of unexplained questions. He wished his mother would change, he wished his father would come back..he wished his brother would stop annoying him... but those were wishful thinking.. a blind hope.

His mother came out after sometime "come on, let's go home" she said and he quietly followed her. They took a taxi home and he looked out of the window as the traffic signal came on.

A kite seller was selling different coloured kites.

"Maa? Can we buy those?"he pointed far away "Pratham likes to fly kites". She shook her head "not now Prithvi.. maybe tomorrow". His eyes brightened with excitement "really?"

She smiled "of course..after you've learnt your lesson". His smile faded; he knew she wasn't taking about his class lessons. He wondered what she was going to hit him with; he didn't like the pan, nor the wooden stick. And definitely not the burnt ladle...it scarred his body.

They reached home and she didn't speak a word. Pratham wasn't back from school yet. Prithvi walked back to his room and kept his bag on one of the shelves.

"I'm going to the office..will you be okay?"she called out to him. He turned "okay"his voice was a whisper "what about lunch?" She shrugged "that's your punishment Prithvi..no lunch for today" she locked the room.

He didn't scream, nor did he bang on the door. He simply collapsed on the bed, hungry.

He opened his eyes after a while and realized the room was open and Pratham was back. "Bhaiya?"he nudged him "how was the meeting?"

Prithvi rubbed his eyes "I don't know" he said truthfully. Pratham blinked "oh..how much did you score?"

Prithvi walked to the kitchen "sixty five percent" he searched for any signs of food but there was none "where's maa? Isn't she back yet?"he rummaged through the fridge for anything to eat.

"No" said Pratham, watching his brother curiously "what are you searching?" Prithvi took out an apple and started munching on it "this".

Pratham stared "I'm hungry too..can I have that?" Prithvi threw the plastic cover at him.

"Can I ask you something?" Pratham asked, taking a big bite of his apple "will you help me?" Prithvi took out another apple "what is it idiot?"he snarled.

Pratham fidgeted a little "I want to meet papa". Prithvi stopped eating "no way..he's gone and he's never coming back" he said honestly.

Pratham shrugged "I want to see him once..I've forgotten what he looks like". Prithvi scoffed "he looks like a monster".

"Please bhaiya!" Pratham caught his hand "please take me to him!" Prithvi pushed his hand away "but I don't know where he is..and if maa comes to know..she'll kill me!"

"Then we won't tell her I promise!" Pratham pleaded "just once I swear..I won't bother you again anymore!" Prithvi thought for a while "let me find out then".

The closest his father had been to was with one of their neighbours Rajesh and Prithvi had somehow weasled the information out of him.

One Sunday, they set out lying to their mother that they were going to practice. Although suspicious initially, she let them eventually.

"How do I look?" nine year old Pratham asked excitedly. Prithvi looked out of the bus window "great..". Pratham beamed "I'm going to draw a picture of him and show to my friends".

Prithvi turned to look at his brother and let out a laugh. "What's funny?" Pratham asked, puzzled. Prithvi shrugged "nothing really". He couldn't understand a thing though; why did people choose to have kids if they didn't even want them?

"Your stop has come" the conductor reminded him and Prithvi got down with his brother, his inner feelings in turmoil.

"Are you sure this is where he lives now?" Pratham asked, looking around..the place looked oddly strange.

"Yeah..Rajesh uncle gave the address" Prithvi replied, checking the piece of paper "maybe we should go back..this isn't a great idea". Pratham held his hand "please don't do this bhaiya"he whined.

Prithvi took a deep breath and nodded "okay..let's get it over with". Pratham smiled and they walked together until they reached a gate.

Prithvi opened it and walked towards the door, ringing the bell once while his heart beat rose rapidly. Sometime later, the door opened to reveal a small boy of Pratham's age "who are you?"he asked.

Prithvi blinked and was about to answer when Pratham intervened "where's papa?"he asked rather rudely. The boy raised his eyebrows but yelled "papa!someone's here".

Prithvi felt bile rising in his throat, he wasn't prepared for this; his father had another family "what is it?"came a familiar voice and they both just gazed at their father.

"P..Prithvi?"their father gasped "how did you..?"he couldn't even finish the sentence. Pratham looked at him "how are you papa?"he asked.

"I..you shouldn't have come here" he looked at his elder son. Prithvi didn't waver his gaze "is that your son?"he asked, looking him in the eye.

"Stepson.." his father said and Prithvi scoffed "stepson..who looks like me..." he burst out laughing "you're a monster and I hate you! You're a disgusting piece of shit and I don't want to see you again!"he spat "I'll never forgive you for what you've done to us, you destroyed us by running away..." he caught his brother's hand "let's go Pratham, I think we're done here".

Pratham gave one last glance at his father and walked away with his brother.

"Prithvi wait!"his father yelled, following them as they had reached the sidewalk "I can explain".

Prithvi stopped "explain that you were cheating on my mother?"he shrugged "I don't think you can".

His father sighed "you don't understand what it's like to be married to your mother...I tried a lot to change her but she wouldn't..".

"Then why did you marry her in the first place? Why did you have us?" Prithvi yelled "you're even worse than her...I don't want to see you again!"he turned and walked away and his brother followed him.

◇◇◇◇◇

"Did you know we are living in a dystopian world?" Kevin scratched his head in frustration. "What the hell?" Prithvi laughed "what's a dystopian anyway?"

"Like an alternative universe" Kevin explained with a shrug "like a parallelism". Prithvi burnt his cigarette in the ash tray and took out another one "you're full of crap today..what's the matter?"

They were seated on the parking lot of their company basement which was on the backyard and they would usually come here to chill, mostly smoke and talk about...nothing and everything in particular.

"He had a fight with his father" Prashanth, their human resource manager stated with a chuckle "regarding the bills you know".

Prithvi inhaled deeply as the smoke filled his lungs "does he ever stop? Why don't you explain to him for once that money doesn't grow on trees?"

The others laughed at that and Kevin glared at him "I don't blame him dude" he sighed and Prithvi knew he was in deep shit; his friend never spoke in such serious tones otherwise. It was a rare occasion.

"It's my fault..this job sucks like anything and instead of aiming higher and trying for a better placement, I'm stuck here since forever..what the hell's the matter with me anyway?" Kevin swore badly.

"It's not you..it's this place.." Prithvi admitted "it holds you like leech and doesn't allow you to get out..I've tried myself you know".

Prashanth exchanged a brief glance at Kevin who nodded "you never tried dude..you blew your chance when you had it..all because of that bitch...she had you.."

"Shut the f##k up!" Prithvi got up "I don't want to talk about it anymore.. and I really appreciate it if you guys forget about it too..I'm sick of hearing the same thing again and again...".

Kevin looked at Prashanth for backup and the latter shook his head and Kevin changed the topic at hand "hey how's your chick from Facebook?"

Prithvi stared at him and then realized what he was talking about "oh..her" he forced a smile "she's great".

"Still going around?" Kevin teased. Prithvi shrugged, trying to lie a little more "I don't know man..like you said, she's a great distraction".

"Prithvi?" Teena approached them and Kevin let out a whistle "talk about distraction". Teena gave a bright smile "I'm done with the design..can you check and tell me if I've to do any improvements".

Prithvi nodded "yeah why not?" But Kevin faced her with an air of defiance "Teena? Want to know a secret?"he snorted "Prithvi's dating a girl, from Facebook..apparently they're very serious and he's whipped like a magnet to an iron".

Prashanth laughed and Prithvi glared at his friend "do you need a microphone Kevin?"

But Teena looked like taken aback by the news "really? That's..um..great" she stammered "you know what? I've already shown it to Sen and he approved it..I guess I'll go then" she walked away before any of them could stop her.

"What the hell was that?" Prithvi asked in disbelief. Kevin smiled "I'm saving her...from having a heartache". Prithvi shrugged "she was being friendly".

"No dude..she's in love with you" Kevin spoke like a philosopher "and the sooner she gets out of her sweet little bubble, the better...I don't think I can take any more office drama".

"Screw you!" Prithvi gritted his teeth "there won't be any drama..I assure you" he checked his watch "I've to go.. it's time".

He made his way back to his cubicle, but his mind raced to Aarti. She was a mystery, and the more he thought about her the more confused he was.

She was twenty five! But didn't look a year older than twenty.

He remembered the incident at the hospital and had to stifle a laugh. She seemed innocent enough; but he knew she was smart for her own good. He was curious about her but she had already warned him not to go looking for answers.

"Prithvi?"he hadn't realised Teena staring at him "oh hey" he smiled "need help?" She ignored the question "are you really dating someone?"

Shit! Kevin was right, "um..yeah.." he lied forcing a fake smile "you know Kevin..he's a big mouth". She raised a curious eyebrow "so you've..moved on?"

Why did everyone keep asking him that? what did they expect him to do? Get drunk and destroy himself in the process? It wasn't like he hadn't tried that...but now the thought felt stupid to him, somehow.

"I've never stopped you know" he joked, at her expense and she gave a half smile "that's good to know..who is she?"

He repeated the same thing he had said to Kevin and she didn't look happy no matter how much she pretended to be "well..that's nice..but are you sure she's the one?"

He observed her..how long had she been in love with him? How could he have missed the signals? Shit shit shit!

He missed the old Teena who was fun loving and always smiling and not this stranger who was trying to sound happy for him but genuinely upset. "Teena...you know you've always been my.." God he hated himself! He hated to give this speech on friendship and loyalty and...

"Colleague and friend..nothing else" he finished, hoping she would understand. She nodded "I'm sorry Prithvi...I should have told you long before...but you had eyes only for.." her eyes were misty "and then you were alone and I..didn't want to be the leftover..I waited for you to make the first move..I guess it got wasted on me..let's forget we had this conversation okay?"

He didn't know what to say to her, she was about to shed tears and he was standing like a buffoon, with nothing but printout in hand "I'm glad we cleared this out" he said finally, something he wanted to say long back, but not to her...but to someone else in another lifetime "you would have regretted it you know..that's who I am..that's who I've always been..someone with no ambition and no forethought and insight into the future..with no dreams and aspirations...and we would have been miserable with each other".

She smiled lightly "you're not a loser Prithvi..." she patted his arm "you're a great human being and I respect you". He smiled back, genuinely this time "thanks". She nodded and walked back to her cubicle but not before giving a small wink in his direction.

He winked back, happy that things were okay between them, if not normal.

◇◇◇◇◇

It was past midnight when Prithvi reached his apartment. It was small, with a single room and kitchen and an attached bathroom but it was enough for him.

As he walked towards the door, he noticed it was unlocked. Only one other person had keys to his room and that meant...

"Bhaiya?" Pratham beamed at him as he opened the door and hugged his elder brother "what a surprise!when did you arrive?"he asked as they walked in together.

"In the evening..I though of surprising you" Pratham said. Prithvi looked around his room, impressed. His brother had cleaned out every bit of the house, even the kitchen looked neat and tidy.

"Why did you touch my things?"he glared mockingly but Pratham looked unfazed "I know you always wait for me to clean up..so".

Prithvi smacked him playfully "how long is your vacation?"he asked as Pratham busied himself by preparing tea.

"Three days but I'm not sure, apparently there's some protest going on in our college so we've been relieved for a couple of days" Pratham explained, pouring the tea into two small cups "I made dinner too".

Prithvi blinked "who the hell are you?" Pratham laughed and set the dishes on the table "just roti and paneer..don't get too attached".

They sat on the small table set for two "so..how's work? did you even think of resigning?" Pratham asked, placing the rotis on his plate.

Prithvi waited till he had munched the roti on his mouth as he was too hungry "work is terrible..and yes I've thought about it twice in fact".

"Did you even discuss with your boss?" Pratham rolled his eyes, already knowing the answer. Prithvi shook his head, taking one more roti.

"What the hell bhaiya!" Pratham glared "okay..what about Amsterdam? Have you considered your training atleast?"

Prithvi snorted "please don't make this dinner miserable like the rest of my day..". Pratham went on to say something but stopped as they continued eating in silence.

'You won't believe..Teena almost proposed to me.." Prithvi smiled and narrated the incident at the office. Pratham nodded "thank God you didn't lead her on..it would be terrible".

Prithvi stared at him in amusement "you don't like her?" Pratham, who had met most of his office staffs just shrugged "I do..she's a sweet girl but she's not good for you..I can tell".

Prithvi wondered what his brother would think if he told him about Aarti; he didn't want him to know..but keeping things from his brother was suffocating for him. And he knew his brother being the saint that he was, would understand the circumstances with which he married her. He would be scandalized..and hurt too..

"You need someone in your life..not your staffs or friends..someone very mature..and simple and uncomplicated" Pratham smiled "why don't you start seeing people?"

Prithvi took his plate and kept it on the sink "let's not talk about me..how's your studies going on?"

Pratham didn't like the interruption but answered anyway "it's alright I guess...you know..papa called the other day.."

Prithvi almost dropped the plate "what? Why? Did you talk? How did he get your number?" Pratham shrugged "I don't know..he was worried..."

"Did he ask about me?" Prithvi looked at his brother "yeah..he said you wouldn't receive his calls.." Pratham approached him "don't you think it's time we forget.."

His words weren't complete when Prithvi cut him off "forget? I'm not a saint like you...and next time he calls, tell him to go piss off...and ask him never to call you or contact any one of us ever again!"he seethed in anger "got it?"

Pratham looked indignant but nodded anyway as they were interrupted by a phone call for his brother "who's Aarti and why is she calling you this late?"

Prithvi immediately snatched the phone from him "er..a new recruitment.." he said and walked to his room "why the hell are you calling this late?are you drunk?"he snapped, throwing the words back at her.

He could sense her silence "hey! What's wrong?"he asked, his tone a little softer. What was wrong with this girl?he could only wonder.

"I'm sorry..did I disturb you?"she asked after a while. "So I'm not the only one who asks dumb questions" he grinned.

"I called you in the evening many times..your phone was switched off" she explained. "Yeah..I was working.. and we're not supposed to use phones on call..I just came back home" he murmured "everything okay?"

"Yeah..er..are you free tomorrow?"she asked rather timidly. He remembered how they had left their last conversation "I've night shift tomorrow so I'm free on the day..why?"

"I need you to accompany me to a place..at sharp nine...can you come?"she asked. He thought for a while "I was serious about my payment" he said in a serious tone.

"I haven't forgotten, I will pay you more" she said "thank you". And the phone went disconnected.