Chapter 5 Over the past.

I want to start a new fresh life devoid of all forms of trauma, maltreatment, and detest. Of course here in Florida nobody knew about my dirty past. Here I hoped I would find some good job, with good bucks as monthly pay and start all over. Initially when I arrived it was difficult for me. I had not even a dime on me. I managed to secure food stamps with which I fed myself. But yet there was no place I could stay. I usually slept beside the stalls. I had only high school education with which I managed to find a simple job.

For three whole months I stated in Florida where I had no shelter over me, and continued to feed from the aid of food stamps. I became very emaciated and skinny. I looked pale, any person sighting me would never think I was from a well to do family residing in California. You may simply conclude I am a reference refugee from one of the war torn regions of the middle East. Out of the sheer instinct for survival, I managed to y move to here Florida at first appeared to be a prosperous one. I had hoped to land a good job start working as a hand for a gardener. I spent first half of the day watering, cutting and arranging the flowers. The later part of the day I spent in hawking the flowers, to road users. With this I was able secure some bucks with which I began to take care of some of my needs. I got myself a manageable shelter. It was a dilapidated small one room apartment. This was located in a shabby area, in the south of Florida. It was a terrible place to live in but I had no choice but to manage it. This one room apartment was so much worn out, it's roof made of zinc material was already bin rust. This made room for easy penetration of water when the rain fell. It's door was already disfigured and broken. It was just there to serve as a cover for privacy for it's occupants. This door served no security of any form. There was no any furniture in it. I managed to buy a blanket with my savings from selling flowers and slept on the bare floor. I really suffered from the cold and dew formed on the floor. But I had no means to help. I decided to begin savings and rent a better apartment. Worst of all about the place where this my apartment was located was the fact that it was an area occupied by junkies. The smoking was so much that it usually affected my breath. I already used to have chest problems and the exposure to endless smoke in this place led to my condition developing to asthma. In a fateful day I came back to my apartment in the evening and met something that shocked me. All my things and the savings I had managed to make were gone. The blanket, the chair I had bought, and the money I had kept from savings for renting an apartment were all no where to be found. I had no doubt whatever that it was the junkies marauding the area that had took all my things. I had no means to do anything about it. I just continued to manage the place while I worked in the garden and sold flowers.

After about seven months starting my savings from scratch, I had gotten enough to rent an apartment that was a good one. This apartment was located in a multi story building bin central Florida. It was a good place to be for someone like me. But I continued to work as a hand to a gardener. I tried various places including stalls, supermarkets and nursery schools to apply for a job, but all to no avail. Something led to my fate of finding a better job, this was my close association with the gardener with whom I worked. He has a friend who visited him on weekends as I noticed. In the course of my work with him he was really impressed by my diligence and hard work. He might have been wondering within himself why I was not something better. I knew he admired me much. He used to ask about my background, and how I came to be hawking flowers for him in Florida while I was supposed to find something better. I told him my story, not the truth of it. But I told him my story in a way he would have much sympathy for me. I of course won't let anyone know about my bad real story here in Florida, when I actually came here to get over the dirty past. Hence I made none of such obvious to him. After I recounted my own woven version of my false story the gentleman appeared much sorry for me and promised to help me find a better job through his friend who visits during weekends. He told me that the man is a manager at a supermarket, and can possibly help to employ me. I was filled with hope. After he had made arrangements with the man about employing me, I was finally lucky to secure a place in the supermarket when one of the salesman resigned. I was most glad. I thought this would be the end of my quest for a better life in Florida. I believed I would finally overcome the trauma and depression of the past.

In a sense, of course I had fulfilled my quest to start a good life. I moved into this apartment in which I live now few months after I started my job as a salesman. It was much better and furnished than the previous one, and closer to my workplace. Hence I found convenient. But this was the beginning of the end for me. I soon started to have terrible nightmares at night, I dread the first Nightmare. It would forever remain fresh in my memory. It till this moment made me feel scared whenever I recall it. Ever since that experience I had fell scared whenever I sight a cat, most especially if it happens to be a black cat. I came home that particular day exhausted from work. The room was not dark, I reached for the switches and put on the light, but strangely there was no power. I of course knew there was no power cut. Maybe electric fixings of my apartment had developed a fault. Hence with the aid of my phone Torchlight I saw around the room. I suddenly felt a very light growling voice behind me, which made me jerk and look back, but there was nothing. On the reflection of the torch light I saw a shadow of a cat on the wall, it must be a cat I'm my room, but when I looked towards the opposite direction there was no any cat there. This really shocked me and I was a bit scared, but thought it may just be that I was mistaken with what I saw. I decided to go to bed after I had my dinner. I was hearing some sorts of mild growls at first, I just concluded to my self it must be cats close by and dozed off. I was sleeping and it must have been very late in the night when my nightmare started. I saw myself walking on a lone boulevard that was very long and narrow. On both sides are little girls looking at me and on the floor we're laying skeletons. I was hearing this statement repeatedly" Sidone is watching you". In the dream I saw a black cat on the far end of the boulevard staring at me. The Nightmare was scary, and all of a sudden a cat leapt over me, making me to wake with a stare. It was the same black cat that Left earlier. When I saw it I was scared to death due to it's strangely glowing eyes and black color. I thought it may be a neighboring cat, and have nothing to do with my nightmare. I managed to sleep back, but I had merely dozed off when I saw this cat in my dream telling me " I am Sidone, you shall hunt your father and make him pay for his sins" I leapt up, and to my dismay the black cat was sleeping right beside my bed. Ever since by life had become a nightmare.