Chapter 4 Ch4

It took less than an hour for me to conclude that I have catch feelings; fallen head over heels in love with my boss and CEO, Mr Jay.

I'm in deep trouble because I can't keep my eyes off him and his magnetic eyes.

I'm in his car, warmed up by both the car heater and the invisible chemistry building between us. . . Seconds by Seconds. . . Minutes by Minutes. . . Hour to Hour.

The feeling is getting stronger and I think I'm about to lose it.

I can tell from his eyes that he feels something for me too, but I don't know if he's single or dating.

Whether this man has a girlfriend; mistress; secret wife or a lover, I don't know anything yet I truly want him to be mine. I'm sure of one thing about him; the fact that there's a soft flesh buried deep within his heart, behind all the hard, stony and cold surface. Behind the heartless, arrogant and a pompous demeanor. Behind all the false and misunderstood criminal facade.

"Make sure to come to office as early as possible tomorrow. I have a very busy schedule. Come along with the essentials you need, like your drugs and keep them close to you. I may have to travel to Busan for the launching event. You'll be right next to me to keep track of my schedules. I've e-mailed some documents to you, check them before you go to bed tonight."

"Yes, Sir. Thank you for today, I'll be going. . . then. . ." I say, and I don't know exactly why I'm hesitating to leave the car. Its as if I'm expecting a kiss or something. He has neatly parked in the opposite direction of my apartment's ten-floored story building. I can't help but to think that he may be holding back his emotion only because he has to; he's my boss after all.

But the car is darkly tinted, he could kiss me if he wants to. . . Like, definitely, he doesn't look like the shy type. Or maybe he doesn't feel that much attracted to me?

"Miss Han?"

"Eoh?. . . Oh. I'm sorry. I'm off, goodbye Sir." My hands sadly falls on the door handle and I'm about to pull open when his hand holds me back.

"Wait." He orders.

I feel the intensity of his hold, and even before I can turn, his hand falls to my jaw and he swiftly turn me around to face him.

The second our eyes meet, electricity passes through my veins almost as though I've just been electrocuted. Time seems to have halt as his face slowly inches close to mine.

Something sparks inside of my stomach, activating my hormones and the moment our lips touch, my heart starts fluttering and pounding hard.

I'm struggling to contain the rush of emotion going in and out of my mind. His lips are pressing hard against mine, but the kiss is slow, gentle, raw, mind blowing and thrilling.

The kiss is building momentum with his warm hands cupping my face securely in a way that makes me feel like I'm his'. And he's mine.

But then he pulls away quickly, breathing hard and running his long fingers into his dark hair, roughing the slicked perfection. He's ruined the beautiful moment.

He doesn't look me as he whisper out an apology in a rough, masculine voice that makes my heart to melt.

I feel like I'm about to pull him back and continue what we've started. That just felt so good and better than my first kiss which occurred when I was in Senior High School.

I lost my first kiss to our school bully who protected me against our class bullies because he liked me. So much that he asked me out five times and got rejected.

"Your handbag, take it." He says, now looking at me with a sudden, serious expression on his handsome face. The black handbag hangs in the air as he holds it up against my chest.

My hands are quick to snatch the handbag and push the door open.

I run out sprinting towards the building entrance as fast as I can before the embarrassment will swallow me.

Ground, open for me to jump in.

How do I face this man tomorrow?

*

"Wipe that smile off your face before I get there! How can you look so happy when you know that your friend is suffering? You're so mean!" Jenny continues yelling into the front camera, her temper making my phone to shake.

My ears have temporarily gone deaf, I regret putting on a headphone to answer her video call.

I can see her messy bun with wisps of hair escaping out of the bun only to make it look like a deserted bird's nest.

The skin under her eyes have puffed up, with an overall tired expression that says she haven't gotten any descent sleep for several nights.

I don't know where or how to start consoling her. She's not getting over her ex and I'm sure she's still crying over the breakup.

The idea lights up in my head, suddenly, making me to chuckle a little. "Yes, right. Jenny let me set you on a blind date with Eomma's friend's son," I say, winking at her suggestively. "I heard the guy is rich and very handsome. He finished his college overseas. His birth name is Lee Dong Woo, what'd you say girl? Are you ready to get back at your jerk ex-boyfriend?" I hope she says yes. This way, I'll be hitting two birds with a single golden stone.

If I set them up together, I'll be helping Jenny to forget her ex boyfriend at the same time make my Mom stop bothering me about him.

"Yaaa, who gets into a relationship just for the sake of revenge? It's unfair to the other person."

Aigoo. . . Can't she just for once, listen to my advice as a friend?

"Hya, just do it to make that jerk regret what he did to you. Men need to feel jealous in other to cherish their relationship in most cases. It doesn't have to be serious, just go on a blind date and post pictures of you together on your SNS."

"Stop lecturing me about men, you've never even dated. I don't want to hear anything like that again," she glares, turning away from the camera for a few seconds before her face swims back into view, holding a pillow to her chest. "Ah, right. Sarah ya, I almost forgot what I wanted to tell you earlier. Do you remember Soo Bong from our middle school?"

Looks like Jenny is up for some hot Internet gossips.

"Eoh. I remember." I lie, even though I don't really remember the name. Maybe just going along with the gist might help to cheer up her mood a little?

"I'm following her SNS you see. She started her modeling career around two years ago, and yesterday she just opened up about being sexually assaulted during her childhood, can you believe who her assaulter is? He's the former Chairman of Famingo Cosmetics, your work place. But people don't even believe her. The Netizens are slamming her that she's only accusing the dead man because he can't talk. Some of her followers on Stargram even posted nasty things about her that she lost her virginity chasing politicians and. . ."

My hand has just taps on the screen and ended the video call. I'm becoming irritated with the flow of the conversation and for some reason, I just can't stand it today. I can't tolerate it right now.

Jenny has reminded me of my past without even knowing what she's done to me. It's so easy for her to focus on only the good things I have in my life and be jealous about it.

Same goes for those Netizens and Internet trolls. They form quick judgements without knowing the reality about others. They don't know the real you, yet they make it so difficult for you to open up about having a traumatic past, especially having a rape history which is a very sensitive topic in our Korean society.

I'm not going to dwell on this only to end up ruining my mood.

I spring out of bed and head for the kitchen to make some spicy ramen to eat before I go to bed. I've already prepared some of my work clothes and other necessities I need for the travel. I've packed them into my smallest luggage just in case if we'll be going to Busan for the launching event tomorrow. Which reminds me. I'll have to check on the documents Mr Jay has sent to me before I take my sleeping pills.

I can't risk getting into another drama with him at the office. I don't even know how to face him after everything that has happened between us.

From the looks of it all, or let's say I'm just having a hunch that he'll probably be giving me the 'I don't care' attitude tomorrow. I hope he won't say the kiss was nothing but a mistake!